Marge vs. the Monorail (S04, E12-071)

"Mono- d'oh!"

Plot Summary
After a long day of work, Homer goes home Flintstones-style, crashing into a chestnut tree in the process.  Meanwhile, Mr. Burns and Smithers take the opportunity to dump some toxic waste in the park (opting not to do the playground as all those bald children are raising suspicion), however they get caught in the act.  As a punishment for total disregard for human life, Burns is ordered to pay $3 million.  Soon, the town has a meeting on how to use that money.  After some discussion, Marge brings up the idea of using the money to fix Main Street, which has been torn apart and is full of potholes.  After Grampa unintentionally rallies support for the idea, it seems like that was going to be the plan.  However, one Lyle Lanley interrupts, and informs the crowd that they could use the $3 million instead toward building a monorail across town.  With some smooth talking and a nifty song, he quickly convinces the town to go for the monorail.

As the monorail is being built, Lanley holds a conductor course to determine who would get to operate the train.  Homer decides to sign up for this course, and after three weeks, Lanley half-assedly gives Homer the job.  A short time later, the family checks the train out, but Marge finds a family of possums in a compartment (Homer calls the big one "Bitey").  Looking to address the issue with Lanley, Marge stumbles upon a notebook with drawings that imply Lanley is gonna flee with tons of money while the train crashes and burns.  Later, Marge investigates the matter by going to a town Lanley had previously said the monorail had put on the map: North Haverbrook.  However, this town is decrepit, run down and its inhabitants scared or crazy.  Suddenly, a man by the name of Sebastian Cobb appears, having overheard Marge.  He informs her that he worked on the North Haverbook monorail, but Lanley cut corners everywhere and made off with the excess money.  As a result, the train was a literal wreck and left the town in ruins.  With the Springfield monorail due to go the next day, Marge and Cobb try to hurry back.

However, they come back too late (Cobb shouldn't of gotten that haircut).  The monorail, with Leonard Nimoy as the special guest, has taken off.  Lanley ran off with the money just before the train started up, but on the flight, it makes a stop at North Haverbrook and he gets his.  Meanwhile, the monorail quickly falls apart from the inside, leaving it speeding up with no immediate way of stopping it.  As the mayor and police chief argue over who has power in an emergency (and later how many "lasses of virtue true" they get in their positions), Marge and Cobb are able to contact Homer, with Cobb advising Homer to use an anchor to slow the train down.  Using the "M" in the train's name from outside, Homer is able to create a makeshift anchor which eventually finds a firm grasp within a giant donut at a donut shop.  Everyone is safe, and Marge narrates on how that was the last time the town wasted money, except for those other instances they did.

Quick Review
Marge vs. the Monorail is the best episode in Season 4, and is one of the best episodes in the entire series.  There is just so many bits, so many jokes, and nearly all of them are excellent.  Both Phil Hartman (as Lanley) and Leonard Nimoy provide superb guest spots as well.  I don't want to call this episode perfect, as that's just a silly word to use for anything, but damn if it isn't close.

Final Score: 10