Midnight Rx (S16, E06-341)

Somebody at the studio actually thought this bit was funny.  How.

Plot Summary
Mr. Burns invites all of his employees and their families to an outing at an aviation museum.  However, it is a ruse: Burns wanted to lull his employees into a false sense of enjoyment before laying down a 'nasty surprise': due to rising costs, the plant will be halting its prescription drug plan.  He's not alone: other major companies in Springfield are doing the same thing as drug costs continue to skyrocket with no end in sight.  Even the retirement home is forced to have its residents go cold turkey.  Grampa has enough.

The old man recruits Homer to go 'across the border' to smuggle in drugs.  The two reach their destination in Canada, where prescription drugs are as cheap and available as candy.  The two easy get past the border control, and the two are able to distribute their goods across town.  Later, both Apu and Ned Flanders have need for specific drugs that they weren't able to get previously, so Homer allows the two of them to go with him and Grampa on their next smuggling run.  This proves costly, as a coffee mishap between Ned and Apu causes border patrol to suspect Homer as part of a terrorist cell, ultimately recovering and arresting the group for the smuggled drugs.

Banished from Canada, Homer and Grampa are once again despised.  Meanwhile, Mr. Burns learns that because of his prescription plan drop, Smithers is no longer able to afford a key medication and his thyroid swells pretty badly.  As Homer comes up with a plan to get back into Canada via a plan, Burns meets the two just at that point to offer his services as that plane's pilot.  In a gigantic wooden plane which, earlier in the episode, couldn't fly well and caught on fire from rain, the three easily fly into Canada to get another shipment of drugs.  However, the plane gets caught in a storm on the way back, and combined with increased weight makes it unable to fly.  Burns escapes, but Homer and Grampa are forced to crash the plane, conveniently into Springfield.  As the police arrest Grampa for scaring them, the town comes up to defend Grampa for what he's done for them, and the police let him go.  Meanwhile, Burns returns with the medicine needed to heal Smithers and, learning a lesson maybe, Burns decides to re-institute the drug plan for his full-time employees.  Perhaps as a coincidence, Homer reveals to Marge that Burns has made him a 'freelance consultant', just as he discovers a lump in his neck.

Quick Review
This was just not a funny episode.  All the references to people taking this drug and that drug and their supposed reasoning wasn't funny.  That whole spiel near the end with Smithers wasn't funny.  The half-assed attempt to mock Canada wasn't funny.  Hardly anything about this episode was funny, least of all the 'everyone likes to pop pills if they can afford it' plot.

Final Score: 3.6

The Bart Wants What It Wants (S13, E11-280)

"Laughing time is over."

Plot Summary
The Simpsons go to a fair hosted by a prep school which, to Lisa's amazement, exists.  While there, he rescues a girl from a pack of prep school bullies.  The girl, Greta, becomes infatuated with Bart while Bart learns that Greta's father is Rainier Wolfcastle aka the actor who plays McBain.  Greta invites Bart over, and soon the Simpsons become friends with Rainier who is happy Greta has a friend in Bart.

Though Greta clearly likes Bart, and makes several efforts to display as much, Bart is oblivious to it and doesn't return Greta's affection, even bringing Milhouse along for some of Bart's visits.  Greta is able to convince Bart to go to her school dance, but Bart forgets about the dance when he learns Principal Skinner is going to attempt stand up at a comedy night, easily opting to see Skinner than going with Greta.  Lisa confronts Bart over this later in the night, and as Bart admits he doesn't feel the same way about Greta, he decides to break up with her, confident she'll take it fine and the two can remain friends.

Of course, Greta takes it poorly.  Bart feels bad for making Greta cry during the break-up, and goes to apologize, but learns that Greta has already found a new boyfriend: Milhouse!  Though he hadn't really been interested in Greta before, the fact that he can't have her now drives Bart insane, and spies on Greta and Milhouse constantly while trying to find a way to get back with Greta.  Then he learns that Greta is going to Toronto with Milhouse as her father is taping for a new movie.  Unwilling to give up on Greta, Bart convinces the family to go to Toronto to find her.  They get there via bus and, after a few throwaway gags against Canada, Bart finds Greta at a movie set.  Milhouse stops him and the two get into a fight.  Greta intervenes and, after breaking up with Milhouse, swears off dating for a few years because of how bad Bart and Milhouse were.  Bart and Milhouse reconcile and decide that, while they're there, to join the Canadian basketball team because its that easy.

Quick Review
I was hoping this episode would score better than it did.  I recall seeing this when it first aired and I remember enjoying it more than other episodes around that time.  It might've been because the parts featuring Rainier Wolfcastle were pretty good which I remembered, but when the plot focuses on Bart and Greta, also Milhouse, it struggles to stay funny which I had forgotten.  Ah, well, its still about on par as far as Season 13 episodes go.

Final Score: 7.5