Moe Letter Blues (S21, E21-462)

This story's biggest failing is the assumption Moe can actually talk to women.

Plot Summary
As narrated by Moe, he notices many married couples going through rough patches, including the Lovejoys, the Nahasapeemapetilons and, of course, the Simpsons.  Its the day before mothers day, and the family sees on a commercial an amusement park on an island to give mothers a break from her kids for the day.  Marge insists Homer take the kids while displaying no enthusiasm towards dealing with Homer's usual tomfoolery.  The next day, Homer, Reverend Lovejoy and Apu take their respective kids to the boat leading toward the island, when the three of them are given a letter at the last second from Moe.  It states that Moe plans on leaving town forever, and that he's leaving with one of their wives.  With the three unable to turn the boat around, they're stuck all day on the island trying to figure out whose wife it is.

Homer recalls a short time ago when Marge hosted a birthday party for her mother, but Homer ruins it for Marge by getting into another fight with Patty and Selma.  Moe was working there as a drink provider, so the theory is that Moe got to Marge after that party.  However, Apu remembers when his family went to Moe's to dry up from the rain, but after leaving a bickering Apu and Manjula realize they forgot a kid back at Moe's.  Manjula goes back by herself, and Homer was at the bar when Moe entertains Manjula and her left behind kid (before Marge took him home for her mother's party), so now its likely Manjula is the departing wife.  Homer and Apu then make Tim remember the Sunday after Marge's party, where the Parson helps the pastor realize that his relationship with Helen isn't as cheery as he had thought.  Inside the church, Moe and Helen get to talking, and outside Apu noticed Helen put her hand on Moe's knee.  So, in the end, none of three can figure out whose wife is being taken.

Finally, the day is at an end, and the husbands get to confirm whether its them or not.  Homer is the first to go, and sees Marge packing from a distance, but soon learns Marge was actually putting away painting supplies as she had been painting in front of her mother for the day.  Her mother helped Marge realize the fault of that fight wasn't Homer's, but Patty and Selma's and Homer and Marge make up, which Lovejoy and Apu can plainly see.  Next up is the Reverend, who upon returning to his room sees that Helen has packed up, telling Tim she's leaving... with him to Istanbul on the world's most romantic train.  Apu sees Tim and Helen kissing and realizes he must be the loser in this game, and upon returning to his apartment he sees Manjula and Moe sitting together.  However, Manjula states she wants to stay with Apu.  Moe then reveals to Apu, and later all three, that he noticed the three wives feeling down following their separate encounters, so he got in contact with Marge's mom to talk to Marge, convinced Helen to take the train to Istanbul with Tim, and then talked things over with Manjula.  Moe wrote the letter to the three of them to help them realize they hadn't been treating their wives right, as there's no better judge of that than an ugly, creepy, perverted, lonely bartender!  Still, Moe's plan worked out for the best.

Quick Review
This episode ended up being okay.  The plot was decently clever if not a little lacking in the humor department, but Moe provided a level of comic relief that kept the episode afloat.

Final Score: 7.0

The Boys of Bummer (S18, E18-396)

Sometimes I wonder why people get so mad at athletes.  Then I realized that if there
weren't any athletes, people would just get mad at politicians.  Now it all makes sense.

Plot Summary
The little league's Springfield Isotots, led by its pitcher Nelson and its other star, Bart, have won their way to the championship game, and Springfield has full-fledged Isotot fever.  As Marge bores someone about Bart at a store, Homer falls asleep in the mattress area.  He wakes up after the owner of the store finds him, but quickly gets his out of the situation by using his enjoyment of the mattress to procure a sale.  The owner takes a liking to Homer's unique approach and hires him to sell mattresses.  The next day, the championship game is played.  Its the bottom of the 9th, Springfield is ahead 5-2, but Shelbyville has the bases loaded with two outs.  Nelson is able to force the batter to pop up, right to Bart, but Bart drops the ball, kicks it away in a fumbled attempt to retrieve it, and makes so many errors on the play all four runners for Shelbyville come in to score, and Springfield loses the game.  The crowd quickly turns on Bart, who boo and throw crap on him constantly.

Homer's new job as a mattress salesman is going along smoothly, when he sells a mattress to the Lovejoys with the promise that it'll help their sex life.  It doesn't, so they go to Homer's house for a refund.  They go upstairs so Homer can angrily write a check, but the Lovejoys learn that the Simpson mattress just lights a fire for them, and the three agree to swap mattresses.  Of course, now Homer and Marge have difficulties in bed, while the Lovejoys are refreshed in more ways than one.  Desperate, Homer and Marge sneak into the Lovejoy home to get their mattress back but miss it so much they make love on it again.  The Lovejoys return home just in time to witness this and, after the initial shock, decide to cut the mattress in half (diagonally for some reason) so that both couples can share the love.  Homer gets turned on enough over what kinds of sandwiches the bed now looks like that they return to their honeymoon spot - behind a billboard where a friendly bum lives - and make out.

Meanwhile, Bart continues to get lambasted all across town for his miscue.  Lisa tries to help him out by taking him to see an old baseball player who also committed a major error way back in Game 7 of the 1943 World Series (for those wondering, its not really true).  However, the guy then learns he's talking to Bart and leads another stream of hate towards him.  Bart eventually cracks, and in a delusional state starts spray painting "I hate Bart Simpson" all over town.  The town witnesses Bart trying to paint the phrase on the water tower when his crazed recklessness gets the better of him and he takes a steep fall.

In the hospital, Bart's detractors continue to chant outside that he sucks.  Marge finally has enough and goes out to scolds everyone for their mindless hate.  The crowd settles, but the damage has been done... or has it, ponders Lisa.  Marge and Lisa decide to stage a recreation of the final out - somehow coercing the other team and the stadium announcer to go along with it, under a faulty premise to justify it being replayed.  Bart is thrilled to get another chance, but fails to make the catch on the redo.  Hastily, an excuse is made for another attempt, but that doesn't work either.  In total, 78 attempts are made, going to day break of the next day, but Bart finally makes the catch to the lethargic cheers of the few remaining.  Sixty years later, an elder Bart continues to gloat of his 'accomplishment' to an elder Milhouse, and Milhouse just can't bring himself to tell the truth to Bart (and stick with it).  Ghosts of Homer and Marge lament both how Bart has turned out as well as their inability to have sex as ghosts.

Quick Review
Well, well, we have a hidden gem in the rough with this episode.  The main storyline has several good moments, notably the scenes featuring the old baseball player and the town's desperate attempt to keep the ruse going for Bart (rather than just apologize for their behavior, mind you).  The mattress subplot had its moments as well, particularly with Homer's grumbling, and it all makes for Season 18's best episode thus far.

Final Score: 8.0

The Twisted World of Marge Simpson (S08, E11-164)

The "Whitey-Whackers", contributing to a dark day in baseball.

Plot Summary
Marge is a member of the "Springfield Investorettes", a group that includes Helen Lovejoy, Maude Flanders, Agnes Skinner, Edna Krabappel and Luann Van Houten.  The group seems to have made a wise investment previously, but now want to take those profits and invest in a small business.  Marge is the only one of the group to oppose the idea, and because it was apparently a final straw, the group kicks Marge out.  Later, Marge is convinced by her family that she should invest in a business herself to show the Investorettes what she can do.

Marge goes to a franchising expo, but is initially unable to find something that suits her.  She's discouraged further when the Investorettes take interest in a Pita stand, something Marge might have possibly of thought about taking an interest in.  Just then, a man at a Pretzel Wagon stand is able to convince Marge to start up a pretzel business.

Although marketing and making the pretzels aren't difficult, selling them is a whole different game.  An attempt to sell that at the power plant, with Homer's help, fails when the Investorettes' Pita van steals her customer base.  Faulty coupon creation coupled with an incident at a baseball game where all of her sampler pretzels are wasted to be thrown at Mr. Burns (and later Whitey Ford), Marge gives up.  Unwilling to see Marge like this, Homer decides to help.  He tries to contact the Pretzel Wagon guy, but he has died in a car accident.  Out of options, Homer decides to ask the mafia for aid.

The mafia is quick to work, sabotaging non-pretzel food options in Springfield, including the Pita van.  Marge's sales go through the roof, blissfully unaware of the mafia's hand in it.  Soon, though, Fat Tony tries to collect from Homer, but when Homer escapes, he goes after Marge instead, giving her 12 hours to cough up all of the profits from her pretzel sales.  After Marge and Homer come to an understanding over what happened, they confront the mafia the next morning, refusing to give in.  Just before the mafia advances on them, the Investorettes appear, having 'caught on' to Marge's 'game', and hired a mafia of their own: the Japanese Yakuza.  As the two mobs engage in battle, the Simpson couple retreat into the house to avoid getting caught in the middle.  Good times.

Quick Review
This episode has its moments, like Skinner's supposed "boaking" accident, or the scene at the baseball game.  The mafia and its battle with the Yakuza was a superb way to the end the episode as well.  Still, besides those moments there wasn't too much funny going on, with a few other good jokes here and there.

Final Score: 8.9

Marge in Chains (S04, E21-080)

"History's greatest monster", now with a new do!

Plot Summary
As the episode begins, Homer and some others purchase an orange juice maker, one shown on TV by Dr. Nick, and is high in demand despite being obviously inefficient.  In an Osaka shipping plant for the juicer, a worker has the flu, which carries into the juicer packages, later infecting the people who ordered them.  Soon, Springfield is plagued by the "Osaka Flu", including some of the Simpson family.  Marge finds herself stressed out and overworked trying to cater to her sick family, and Grampa as well.  At the Kwik-E-Mart, she had put a bottle of bourbon (for Grampa) into her coat pocket and forget to have it paid for; upon leaving the store she is found out and is arrested for shoplifting.

With Apu unwilling to drop the charges as per store policy, Homer and Marge get Lionel Hutz to defend them in court.  Unfortunately for them, the odds are stacked against them as Hutz has had trouble with Judge Snyder in the past (kinda running over his dog, except replace "kinda" with "repeatedly" and "dog" with "son").  What's more, as news about Marge's arrest spreads, so do rumors about her, giving off the notion that she's crooked.  At the trial, the gossipy Helen Lovejoy conveys as much, and though Hutz actually does a good job at discrediting Apu, he later blows it by giving his closing statement while wearing no pants.  Marge is sentenced to 30 days in jail.

Almost instantly the family struggles without Marge.  With neither the kids nor Homer able to wash dishes or clean clothes, the house begins to fall apart, becoming a huge mess.  Marge's impact isn't truly felt, though, until the bake sale when several customers learn that they can't purchase any delicious marshmallow squares because it was Marge that baked them.  The loss of those squares, $15, was exactly the amount needed for the bake sale to have enough money to purchase an Abraham Lincoln statue.  Instead, with the smaller amount of money, the town buys a Jimmy Carter statue instead, which causes an angry riot of course.  Soon, though, Marge's 30 days are up and she returns home with a crowd happy she's back and sorry she left.  They make it up to her by giving her a statue, though its just the Carter statue modified to have Marge's hair.

Quick Review
Marge in Chains, like pretty much all of Season 4, is an excellent episode.  The bits with the flu at the episode's start were done well, everything involving Lionel Hutz was comedic excellence, and the town rioting over the Jimmy Carter statue - and the events leading up to it - were well done as well.

Final Score: 9.5

Life on the Fast Lane (S01, E09-009)

Won't be the last time we see this.  No, really, its in a clip show episode too.

Plot Summary
Marge, frustrated that Homer "gave her" a bowling ball for her birthday, surprises Homer by actually keeping it and putting it to use at the bowling alley.  While there, she gets bowling help from a rather suave man named Jacques, and his aggressive moves escalate the relationship.  While both Homer and the kids realize something is amiss, Marge eventually has a tough decision to make: meet Jacques at his apartment to really get things going, or stick with Homer.  She decides on the latter, meeting Homer at the nuclear plant, and the two respark their relationship, in the back of one of their cars in a ten minute span.  All's well that ends well.

Quick Review
There are a lot of episodes on The Simpsons which delve into the marriage of Homer and Marge Simpson, and how things like an attractive man, an attractive woman, or Homer's general stupidity can put that marriage at risk.  For awhile, it seemed like there were one or two such episodes per season.  There are even flashback episodes which have their relationship tested.  Its one of the more common types of episodes in the series, and with but a few exceptions most aren't really that great.

Such is the case for the first of these episodes, Life on the Fast Lane.  In terms of humor, the episode didn't have much going for it.  There were a few good jokes here and there, which does include the ending, and the introduction of Reverend Lovejoy's gossipy wife Helen was excellent.  However, it was just too little for the episode to really be considered great.

Final Score: 6.6