Much Apu About Something (S27, E12-586)

Addicted to scratch-off tickets is bad enough.  Addicted
to Big Bang Theory tickets is irredeemable, honestly.

Note: not to be confused with the Season 7 episode Much Apu About Nothing.

Plot Summary
Mayor Quimby attempts to make Springfield a tourist attraction by replacing the old Jebediah Springfield statue with something more interactive.  A parade is held for the new statue, which turns out to be a total dud, but during the parade Bart instigates a feud between the police and the volunteer firefighters which results in the police's new heavily armored vehicle to crash into the Kwik-E-Mart, injuring Apu and his brother Sanjay.  For his part, Bart's misdeed was both seen and caught on camera by Homer, who makes a deal to Bart not to turn him in as long as he stops pranking altogether.

In the hospital, Sanjay admits to Apu that he no longer cares to operate the Kwik-E-Mart anymore and has decided to give the business up to his son, Jamshed who had agreed to rebuild the store.  Six weeks later, Apu sees to his horror that Jamshed, who goes by "Jay" now, has rebuilt the Kwik-E-Mart into "Quick & Fresh", a modern store which sells only organic food.  Its revealed that Apu became addicted to scratch-off ticket playing after winning $25 on his first try, but in order to fund his habit Apu gave up more and more of his share of the store's ownership to then Sanjay, allowing Jay to have majority ownership of the new store.  The two constantly argue, with Jay somewhat offended by Apu being an Indian stereotype, and Apu offended that Jay is acting like a complete hipster millennial stereotype.  Ultimately, Jay fires Apu from the store.

Meanwhile, Bart holds up his word and refuses to prank despite Milhouse's attempts otherwise.  Bart starts becoming a good student overall, but as Homer doesn't care about that, Lisa connects with Bart now that they've both been shunned.

Wallowing away in his sorrows, Apu goes to Moe's to sulk, but the gang there gets the idea of having Bart pull a prank on Jay as part of a plan to get Apu his store back.  Homer is reluctant at first, liking Bart as he is now, but Apu's friendship with everyone is too much to ignore so Homer agrees to have Bart pull the prank.  Homer again is reluctant when he sees Bart being good, but when Bart begins to try to negotiate the terms of the prank, Homer realizes Bart has turned once more.

Bart's prank is rather simple: pull the plug on the store's power for a little bit, and since everything in the store is organic, the lack of conditioning would force the food to immediately go bad because that's a thing that can happen.  Despite Lisa's last second plea to stop Bart, Bart goes ahead and turns off the store's power and sure enough everything in the store rots.  Bart turns the power back on, but that causes an accident in the store that sets it aflame.  Apu goes to console Jay over his failure, but notices one scratch off ticket survived the fire as well as a single penny.  To his luck, the ticket wins Apu a million dollars, enough for him to rebuild and fully own a new Kwik-E-Mart just like his old one.  As thanks to Homer, Apu presents him a golden Squishee cup with free and infinite refills that will only cost him $3 in the long run.

In the episode's conclusion, Quimby orders the police to destroy the failed new Jebediah statue, but the police only end up destroying their new armored vehicle instead.

Quick Review
After a string of disastrous episodes, this one gets the show back on track.  Jay was not a good character, I don't know if "buzzword-spouting hipster millennials" like Jay actually exist, I tend to think that's not the case but I may just be naive.  In any case, Jay basically brought the episode down single-handedly.  The scenes with Apu himself were good, the parade has its moments and Bart's subplot was overall fine, but the episode suffered every time Jay spoke.

Final Score: 7.3

Covercraft (S26, E08-560)

Sideshow Mel's family, nothing more than a quick gag.  Sure was worth the wait.

Plot Summary
A dispute between Moe and the owner of the next door music shop ends with both of them going to jail and their businesses closed down.  This forces Lisa to go to the "big corporation" music store for her needs.  Homer takes her there and quickly becomes the target of opportunistic salesmen.  They get him playing the bass guitar and as Homer finds that he's actually good at it, the salesman sell him that plus tons of accessories, the combinations of which cause low-pitched chaos at home.  Marge complains about this to her circle of friends, who then admit they have similar problems with their husbands.  Marge then realizes that the husbands can form their own band, and thus only bother one wife at a time.

The husband crew consists of Homer at bass, Kirk van Houten at piano, Dr. Hibbert at drums, and Reverend Lovejoy at guitar.  After learning they all have the same taste in music, the four quickly gel and jam.  Soon after that, Apu arrives to be the group's singer, and reveals that, due to his time at the Kwik-E-Mart, he has developed the voice of the lead singer from the group Sungazer to maintain his sanity listening to the group's songs nonstop at the store.  With this voice added in, the group decides to become a cover band, dedicated to their craft, thus the name Covercraft.  The group gets a gig at the Springfield Cabbage Festival, but Apu is nervous.  Homer convinces Apu to believe that he's at the Kwik-E-Mart with nobody around, handing Apu his work uniform to help with the setting, and with that mindset Apu helps Covercraft become a popular cover band in Springfield.

Soon, Sungazer - whose lead singer passed away - decides to make Apu their singer for their tour, and Apu gleefully accepts.  Homer becomes envious of Apu's supposed success, and out of panic disbands the remains of Covercraft.  Still, Apu sends the Simpson family tickets and backstage passes to Sungazer's concert in Springfield.  Homer 'realizes' that Apu couldn't of gotten this far without Homer's advice and goes backstage to steal back Apu's uniform.  Forced to hide, Homer witnesses Sungazer treating Apu like crap thanks to a harsh contract Apu signed.  Realizing Apu does not, in fact, have it good, Homer drops his anger and helps Apu enact a little revenge of his own by ordering in a buffet of Kwik-E-Mart quality hot dogs for Sungazer.  They quickly become ill, and Apu takes the opportunity to have Covercraft perform the concert instead.  The police figure out the hot dog scheme, though, and Apu and Homer are arrested in due time.

Quick Review
This episode was pretty boring, I felt.  Not a lot of jokes, but not a lot of "bad" things either.  The focus was clearly on music, and the few attempts at comedy (the opening bit with Moe and the music shop owner, for instance), had a few misses that held the episode back.

Final Score: 6.0

The Sweetest Apu (S13, E19-288)

Now, see, if a guy tried this, it would be seen as creepy and/or sick.
Gotta admit though, that is pretty hot.

Plot Summary
At the Kwik-E-Mart, Apu is exhausted after Manjula brings the octuplets to the store.  The kids, plus a wife that isn't putting out, and Apu isn't feeling the best.  After they leave and Apu cleans the mess, Homer comes in to rent a beer keg for a civil war reenactment that's about to start.  About this time, the "squishee lady", Annette, comes in to refill the squishee machine, and Homer and Apu note that she may like him despite his current marital status.  After a rather inaccurate reenactment, Homer returns the now busted keg in hopes that he can get his money back.  He doesn't see Apu, but he hears giggling in a side room.  Curious, Homer takes a peek, and finds Apu makin' squishees with Annette, if you understand what I'm saying.

Homer backs away, all the way back home where Marge quickly figures out that Apu is having an affair.  Marge is particularly distraught over this, having hosted Apu and Manjula's wedding, and she and Homer decide to try and help Apu before Manjula finds out.  Homer (eventually) confronts Apu over what he saw, and Apu does feel shame over it and agrees to break up with the Annette.  However, Annette comes on to him again, and the two presumable have fun once more.  Manjula starts to catch on that something is amiss, and is able to grab security footage from the Kwik-E-Mart which shows Apu in the middle of his adultery.  Angered, she kicks Apu out.  Homer and Marge try one desperate ploy to get the two back together, but it doesn't work, and Manjula decides to file for divorce.

Manjula still has some feelings for Apu, and with the divorce lawyer she visits acting rather devilishly, she decides to hold off on divorce for now.  Marge is able to get each of the octuplets to ask for Manjula to get back with Apu, and she finally relents although she still wants Apu to suffer.  Marge comes up with an idea: create a list of rather off-the-wall tasks for Apu to complete that, once finished, will allow Apu to come back.  The tasks, which include breaking up with Annette as well as doing a rendition of My Fair Lady with the octuplets, are all eventually completed and the two reconcile with Homer watching rather creepily (again).

Quick Review
This wasn't that great of an episode.  In the now four episodes where she has had some focus, Manjula has yet to develop any sort of character quirk that would make her a funny, worthwhile character, and "Apu's arranged wife who gave birth to eight kids at once" isn't a funny character quirk.  In fact, I'd even say that her presence has limited Apu's comedic potential.  It sounds weird, I know, but really, just compare the episodes focused on just Apu with the ones that include Manjula: usually the solo-Apu episodes are much better.

There's a few other things I didn't like which kept this episode's score down.  Homer constantly backpedaling home was an okay gag, if a bit stretched out, but for him to peek into Apu and Manjula's home late at night on a ladder, and then after seeing them get it on start to hop backwards while on said ladder, well that's just stupid.  The collar-pulling gag is one of my least favorite gags and it makes several consecutive appearances in this episode as well.  Ignoring all of that, there are several jokes that do work, but it gets vastly overshadowed by everything that went wrong.

Final Score: 6.4

Eight Misbehavin' (S11, E07-233)

"Help, I need tungsten to live.  Tuuunnnnngsteeeenn..."

Plot Summary
The Simpsons go to a Ikea-like superstore, where they come across Apu and his wife Manjula.  The two spend a little time with Maggie, and come to decide that it's time for them to have a baby of their own.  Initial efforts to conceive a child prove fruitless, but Apu enlists Homer's help and eventually Manjula becomes pregnant.  Nine months later, Apu meets his first-born child - and then the other seven as Manjula has given birth to octuplets as Apu, Manjula and members of the Simpson family gave Manjula fertility drugs nine months ago.

The couple are initially thrilled with the babies, as is the local media, and companies are giving them free gifts for the miracle.  However, news turns up that a Shelbyville couple has given birth to nine babies, and suddenly all the media attention and free gifts are redirected to the nonuplets of Shelbyville, leaving Apu and Manjula with nothing.

Raising eight babies becomes overwhelming for the two, when a man comes over to talk to Apu.  The man, Larry Kidkill, offers the chance for Apu's babies to be raised at the zoo complete with nursing and care, with the only 'catch' being that the public are allowed to watch them as well.  With Butch Patrick around to help convince them, Apu and eventually Manjula agree to the terms.  Later, though, they learn that the babies are also contractually obligated to be part of an extravagant show, a detail that the parents overlooked but neither are pleased with.  They try to confront Kidkill, but are shown off the premises.

Apu again enlists Homer's help and the two sneak in at night and grab the eight babies.  They flee back to the Simpson place, but Kidkill finds them and demands their return.  Homer instead convinces Kidkill to let the babies go by having him be part of a new show, where he and Butch Patrick fend off venomous snakes (or robot snakes filled with venom).  Seeing Homer's trials, Apu and Manjula realize that raising eight babies can't be all that difficult.

Quick Review
This was an okay episode, for the most part.  It had its moments and a few jokes were pretty good.  Throughout the episode, though, I found it odd that the Simpson family kept being involved in Apu's affairs.  He gets Homer to help him conceive a baby, the Simpsons are there during the birth for some reason, they go see the baby show at the zoo, and them Homer helps Apu out at the end.  It seems like this Apu-centric story had the Simpson family kinda, I dunno, shoehorned into it, and it didn't really seem... natural, I guess?  Is that the word I'm looking for?  Probably not, but it still bugged me.

Final Score: 7.4

I'm With Cupid (S10, E14-217)

Its very clearly a star yet nobody recognizes it as such.

Plot Summary
Marge goes out to the Kwik-E-Mart late to build Bart's project (which Nelson ruins later on), and checks up on Apu's relationship with his new wife, Manjula, but Apu only mentions that she understands that Apu has to work at the Kwik-E-Mart nearly non-stop, though Apu does invite Marge and Homer over to his apartment for dinner.  At that dinner, Marge blurts out that, no, most American men do not work every day like Apu and, no, nobody works for 18 hours a day like Apu.  Angered that Apu cares more about work than her, Manjula gets into an argument with Apu, forcing the two Simpsons to leave for the night.

The next day, Homer catches Apu at wit's end over his relationship with his wife, but realizes that its only a week away to Valentine's Day, and decides to go all out on rekindling his relationship with her.  He puts out a note, in public, that he will do an act of love for Manjula every day up to Valentine's Day.  The acts are indeed extravagant, from a carriage ride to Apu covering himself in chocolate, to a singing parrot informing Manjula that she's invited to go to an opera with Apu.  These acts of love make taken women across Springfield jealous, and even upset that their men are cheapskates.  The men across town, including Homer, have had enough of Apu's antics and in response decide to find a way to sabotage Apu's final act of love (rather than, you know, do romantic things for their women instead).

A strike team is created consisting of Homer, Moe, Dr. Hibbert, Chief Wiggum and Flanders, though Ned gets tossed out for being too reasonable.  The remaining four tail Apu to the airport where they find Elton John.  Mistaking that he's part of Apu's act, they trick him into going in a cage, but then they learn that Apu's real plan is to have a skywriter take a plane to draw out the phrase "I ♥ U MANJULA".  Homer is able to get in the plane just as it take off, and he and the skywriter get into a fight.  The fight causes the spray can to explode, instead creating the phrae "I ♥ U *", with the five pronged star somehow being interpreted across town by women as a message meant for them, though Marge can't make the star out to be anything.  The fight continues, the plane descending at a rose garden where Homer is swarmed with prickly roses.  The plane flies low over the Simpson backyard, and Homer is able to fall out, somehow grouping the roses into a bouquet and landing in a kneeling position despite barely being conscious.  Marge adores the supposed gesture of love, and is happy with Homer once again.  Though the skywriting plan fails, Apu is able to recruit Elton John to sing for Manjula as the Kwik-E-Mart is closed for the remainder of the day.

Quick Review
This was a good episode overall.  Elton John's appearance was well done, I felt.  There wasn't much comedy going on during Apu's acts of love so the episode's score is hurt from that, but otherwise it was fine.

Final Score: 7.9

The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons (S09, E07-185)

Staff: "Wow, someone sure likes his kidney mush!"
Homer: "Damn right!"

Plot Summary
At a bachelor auction, its learned that Springfield's bachelor pool is... pretty bad.  One notable exception is Apu, who eventually makes himself known.  After listing his credentials, five ladies pool $900 to each have a date with Apu.  As he's having these dates, he comes to enjoy the bachelor life, telling Homer some stories one day at the Kwik-E-Mart.  Just then, he gets a letter from his mother, which tells him that its time for his arranged marriage, one that was agreed upon when Apu was still a child (this was touched upon in Much Apu About Nothing, back in Season 7).  Unwilling to lose the bachelor life he just gained, he gets help from Homer and decides to call his mother to tell her that he already married.  With that out of the way, Apu goes back to enjoying himself.

Some time later, again with Homer hearing Apu's stories at the Kwik-E-Mart, Apu is stunned to find his mother coming out of a taxi.  Realizing that she here to see Apu's "wife", he desperately has Homer come up with a new plan.  Homer casually comes up with the idea to have Apu pretend Marge is his wife, and goes home to get things ready.  Of course, Homer forgets about it, and only tells Marge just seconds before Apu arrives with his mother.  Put on the spot, Marge reluctantly agrees to go along with the charade, barely able to fill the kids in on what's happening as well.

Needing a place to hide, Homer finds that Moe is going on a vacation so instead he goes to the retirement home to visit Grampa.  There, the staff confuse Homer with another, otherwise unaccounted for patient, and Homer is more than happy to play the part.  While having fun eating mush, riding in wheelchairs and getting others to do the most basic tasks for him, Homer is eventually busted when the actual patient returns, having previously escaped to go on a bender.  Homer returns home to Marge, but a bit too early as Apu's mother sees Homer and Marge in bed, forcing Apu to admit that he does not have a wife and that he really doesn't want to go through with the marriage.  His mother understands but still forces Apu to go through with it, having his bride Manjula flown in as soon as possible.

Perhaps to make up for playing a part in the ruse, the Simpsons host the wedding in their backyard.  Apu continues to dread the event, but his attitude starts to change when he actually sees Manjula, who is a very attractive young woman.  The two quickly get to know one another, and despite Homer's last second attempt to sabotage the wedding, the two become wed.

Quick Review
I'll say this to start: the entire scene regarding the wedding was hardly funny.  Homer, and to a lesser extent Moe try to add humor to the scene but it just wasn't working for me.  Most of it was either making sure they portrayed the Hindu ceremony correctly or it was Apu and Manjula trying to make the situation more humorous than it was, and it just wasn't happening.

What saves the episode is the rather short subplot when Homer hides out at the retirement home and sees just how babied the residents of said home truly are.  Without this portion of the episode, which one could argue was thrown in to fill time, I have a hard time seeing this as being a good episode.

Final Score: 8.0

Much Apu About Nothing (S07, E23-151)

"Say, lets take a relaxed attitude toward work and watch
the baseball match.  The Nye Mets are my favorite squadron."

Plot Summary
"A large, bear-like animal, most likely a bear, has wandered down from the hills in search of food, or perhaps employment."  Kent Brockman states to start the episode.  The bear is quickly tranquilized, however Homer starts up a bear panic with the neighborhood and an angry mob confronts Mayor Quimby over it.  Quimby vows to stop any and all bear intrusions from now on much to the joy of the mob.  Soon, high tech bear patrols roam Springfield, but the cost of maintaining it means taxes go up ever so slightly, again enraging the town.  Finding true leadership within himself to duck this issue, Quimby rests the blame solely on illegal immigrants, and states that a vote will be held a week from now - Proposition 24 - to determine whether to deport illegal immigrants.  The mob is again appeased, and xenophobia quickly sets in town.  Homer is apart of this, even after learning that Apu is an illegal immigrant, and has no idea what to do if 24 passes.

Later, when Marge visits Apu, he tells his story.  Having been the highest ranked graduate out of a million or so at Calcutta Technical Institute, Apu is granted a visa to continue his studies in the United States, which he does.  When his visa expired, though, Apu was unwilling to leave as he had made so many friends in Springfield, and just stayed around.  Marge decides then to vote 'no' on 24.

However, it still seems 24 will be passed easily.  Desperate for an answer, Apu sees Kearney's newest fake ID and inquires him on where he got it.  Soon, Apu makes a deal with the mob for forged documents which 'prove' Apu was born in Green Bay, and Fat Tony encourages him to act American to avoid suspicion.  However Apu is neither able or willing to keep the ruse going for long, and breaks down after Homer becomes suspicious.  Seeing Apu in tears, Homer finally decides he'll vote 'no' on 24 as well, and decides to help Apu stay in America as well.

Its suggested by Bart that Apu could stay if he married a citizen, however the one person they tried, Selma Bouvier Terwilliger Hutz (!?) McClure, didn't want to marry for once.  Then, Lisa realizes that, since Apu has been in American long enough, he can simply take the citizenship test.  However, with the test just a couple of days away, he really needs to cram.  Homer tries to teach him, but Apu remembers none of Homer's lessons, much to Apu's fortune.

Apu is able to pass the test and become an American citizen.  At a celebration, Homer encourages the crowd to vote 'no' on 24, however 24 still passes by a 95% landslide.  Still, Apu is happy he can stay in American and in fact only one person is deported following the vote: poor Groundskeeper Willie.

Quick Review
This is another one of those 'start fast, finish slow' kind of episodes.  The whole thing with the bear at the beginning was wonderfully done, and Mayor Quimby's 'leadership' was humorous as well.  Once the episode settled in on Apu and Prop 24, the jokes died down a bit but overall this episode is another strong entry for Season 7.

Final Score: 9.1

Homer and Apu (S05, E13-094)

"Hey, he isn't happy at all!  He lied to us through song!  I hate when people do that!"

Plot Summary
Episodes featuring the side characters have been few and far between thus far, but this is the first of what will be quite a few episodes that center on the shopkeeper of the Kwik-E-Mart: Apu.  The episode starts on a typical day at the store, with Apu price gouging whenever possible.  He finds spoiled ham that expired years ago and, instead of getting rid of it, puts it in the bargain bin convincing himself nobody would buy it.  Of course, Homer quickly buys it and eats it, getting so sick he requires a visit to the hospital.  Confronting Apu about it later, Homer is calmed when Apu gives Homer not five, but ten pounds of what seems to be aged shrimp.  After a second trip to the hospital, Homer sees on TV that he can file a consumer complaint, and does so.  Kent Brockman contacts him in an attempt to expose Apu by using a gigantic camera hat.  Despite Homer's bumbling, the ploy ultimately works, and Apu is caught selling a filthy hot dog that fell on the floor.  Embarrassed, a superior of Apu has no choice but to fire Apu from his job.

Depressed, Apu ultimately decides to "settle the score" with Homer, though what that means is Apu is willing to work for Homer to make up for poisoning him multiple times.  Quickly, Apu becomes a big part of the family as his cooking, food placement, and shopping line skills help out tremendously.  To celebrate, Apu sings a song about how over he is from the Kwik-E-Mart, but a short time later, admits he still misses it deeply.  He decides to go to India to speak with the head of the Kwik-E-Mart, while Homer comes with.  The long, tiring trip ends poorly when the head of the Kwik-E-Mart only permits three questions, which Homer wastes to inquire as to whether he truly is the head of the Kwik-E-Mart (and he still isn't sure afterward).  Ultimately, Apu decides to face his demons, and go back to the Kwik-E-Mart for the first time since his firing.

In the meantime, the store manager hires actor James Woods to take over Apu's position.  Woods, who takes the job to get a better knowledge of the position for an upcoming movie role (which changes to something completely unrelated later on), is thrilled to see Apu when he returns, having watched him on security tapes.  At that moment, a robber walks up to the two of them and upon learning one of the men was James Woods, fires a shot.  Apu quickly jumps in front of Woods, taking the shot that leaves him a bit nostalgic.  Turns out, that bullet deflected off another bullet that had lodged in Apu from a previous robbery.  As thanks for saving his life, Woods is able to get Apu his job back, and with the happy ending the Simpson family hugs Apu, twice.

Quick Review
This ended up being a fine episode, not among the best Season 5 episodes, but it holds its own anyway.  Apu's "Who Needs the Kwik-E-Mart" song was done well (including the bits where Apu trips up Grampa twice), and James Woods had a strong part as well.  The quantity of jokes just wasn't here this time, I felt, and the whole trip to India bit was lacking in that department aside from one or two instances.  Still, a great episode.

Final Score: 8.3