Grampy Can You Hear Me? (S29, E05-623)

Recap: Grampa gets a hearing aid and learns he is mocked quite often outside of his old hearing range.  Meanwhile, Skinner has a falling out with his mother upon learning that she killed his dream of being a band marcher.

Review: The Grampa sidestory, and it was a side story despite it claiming the episode's title, starts off decently enough but after Grampa learns people mock him often the story takes a back seat and then ends on a dull, pointless note with little payoff.

The Skinner story, which I believe is the first case of the show actively ignoring The Principal and the Pauper, was better overall.  It had funnier gags, the stuff with Ohio State was decent albeit with a few misses, and it had better plot development overall although it, too, had a rather tame end.

Its kind of odd, the episode really didn't know how to end itself.  Its not like the ending needed to be rushed; the episode had the full, entire open, an extended couch gag, and a lengthening unrelated bit at the end because the episode itself was so short; that time could've been used to create a much more satisfying conclusion to both plot lines.  Sad, really.

Final Score: 6.7

Looking for Mr. Goodbart (S28, E20-616)

This stuff is cringe central when the Simpsons parody it as poorly as it does
for someone familiar with the source material.  I wonder how stupid it looks
for those who aren't familiar?  Does it actually work for them?  It doesn't, right?

Note: this is the first episode to air following the 30th anniversary of the first Simpsons short Good Night.  It celebrated that fact by airing the Maggie portion of the short followed by a quick song about the anniversary.

Plot Summary
After Bart pulls off more tomfoolery, this time on Seniors day which gets even Grampa in trouble, Skinner gets the idea of his mother, Agnes, be escorted by Bart.  Quickly, though, Bart realizes how much Agnes dotes on the boy just because he shows basic affection for the old lady and decides to make a con out of it.  Soon, he's approached by another old lady, Phoebe, who is on to Bart's scheme but nevertheless offers Bart $100 to help out leave her retirement home for four straight days.

Meanwhile, Homer becomes part of the Pokemon Go Peekimon Get craze, which includes him walking into all sorts of dangerous situations in search of imaginary rewards.  Lisa agrees to join him because she, too, is a big fan of the game.  Eventually, Homer and Lisa agree to just spend real money to acquire the creatures, $600 worth.

Phoebe reveals to Bart that she's a nature photographer and the two enjoy the four days together. Afterward, Phoebe bequests Bart her camera.  Unaware of the meaning of the word 'bequest', Bart eventually learns that its to give an item away before dying.  Recalling relevant memories, including one where Phoebe admits she's going to off herself, Bart realizes he needs help, and recruits Homer and Lisa, whose wilderness experience have improved thanks to their time playing the game.  The two, alongside other veteran players, start their search in perhaps one of the worst animated sequences in recent memory, but ultimately Phoebe is found.

Evidently, Phoebe has found a new meaning in life and decides to not die, requesting back her camera though Bart gets her to agree to have the two of them go on more nature walks.  It turns out this was all a story (albeit apparently true) Bart told Grampa to explain why he was sorry for getting him in trouble.  Also, during all of this Skinner tries to man up but can't.

Quick Review
This episode was unfortunate.  The main storyline with Bart and eventually Phoebe was actually very decent and set itself pretty well for a good, emotional ending.  However, the Pokemon Go-ripoff sidestory, which was nearly a year late in being relevant and even less so in doing the reference well, ruins the main story by becoming a major factor in Bart's search.

The search, which turns into a simulation of the game with Lisa singing the song from the American version of the original anime, was probably the worst thing the show has done since maybe the Ke$ha incident.  The song, which as far as I know isn't even in Pokemon Go itself, was poorly sung and the visuals during the song was both unimpressive and unnecessarily edgy as well.  It completely destroys any emotional impact of Bart's story and, as a result, hampers what could've been one of the season's better episodes.

Final Score: 6.0

Teenage Mutant Milk-Caused Hurdles (S27, E11-585)

Meanwhile, on Simpsons Singapore...

Plot Summary
Bart's class gets another new 4th grade teacher, Ms. Berrera, an army vet whom Bart quickly becomes smitten with.  However, Bart soon realizes that Principal Skinner is also smitten with her, and he and Skinner begin to clash for Berrera's affection.  Meanwhile, on an errand to buy $16 organic milk, Homer is instead convinced by Apu to buy the much cheaper and questionable Buzz "Milk" (a parody of Coca-Cola Fairlife which I forgot was a thing, thanks writers for reminding me of stuff from a year ago, again).

A few days later, Lisa grows acne and Bart, a mustache.  Once Maggie becomes gorilla-like in appearance and strength, the family realizes the "milk" is to blame and quickly ditch it.  During this time, Lisa wears makeup to cover her acne, which makes her quite popular.  In just a week's time she becomes obsessed with her popularity and tries to really go all out for an outdoor party, but with rain imminent Lisa realizes her luck is up and attempts to preempt the rain by revealing her flaws to everyone, but the acne has since cleared up so Lisa's plan backfires and she's back to being unpopular.

Meanwhile, perhaps due in part to his mustache, Bart eventually loses out to Skinner, whom he sees kissing Berrera.  In vengeance, Bart decides to pull prank after prank on Skinner while he's with Berrera in some attempt to break them up.  Lisa advises Bart that the hormones from the "milk" is responsible for Bart's current behavior.  He calms down, loses his mustache and invites both Skinner and Berrera to an ice-skating park where he simply wishes the couple the best.  In short time, Skinner attempts to introduce Berrera to his mother and his lame lifestyle, which disgusts Berrera so badly she goes back to the army.  Bart, Skinner and Milhouse for some reason bond over the experience some time later.

Quick Review
This was a pretty boring episode.  Not a lot of humor, especially later on, and the episode wraps up in a seemingly rushed, haphazard way which doesn't help it at all.  The premise of the episode was weird, there was a Lisa sideplot because apparently Season 27 is all about Lisa, and most of the plot just fell flat.

Final Score: 5.8

Mathlete's Feat (S26, E22-574)

Oh yeah, they wore hats for some reason.  I dare you to care.

Plot Summary
Lisa and the rest of Springfield Elementary's math team competes in a local competition against Waverly Hills but gets blown out in every sense of the phrase, except the literal one.  The three judges of the competition, the three college nerds Homer once befriended, and who have since struck it rich thanks to a popular phone app they developed, decide to help their old elementary school by upgrading its tech to modern times.  However, Skinner uses a power strip that isn't a surge protector to plug in all of the new servers and such, causing a quick overload of electricity, effectively shutting down everything.

With the school now with no technology or power, Lisa finds a sudden interest in Groundskeeper Willie's odd, (supposedly) ancient Scottish measurements for science while he's doing yardwork.  Soon, Lisa proposes the "Waldorf" method of education, which proposes students can learn without the use of any educational materials by making everything more hands on with what's available, "winging it", as it were.  Everyone in school gets to liking it pretty quick and more resistant stalwarts such as Homer give in soon enough.

For being the one to introduce it to Lisa and subsequently everyone else, Willie gets named coach of the math team.  Soon, Willie witnesses Bart throw one egg, and believing it to be a perfectly calculated throw, he makes Bart captain of the team.  Soon, the Springfield math teams gets its rematch against Waverly Hills, and with their new methods of math and Bart's last second save, the team earns the win thanks to, basically, lower standards.  Afterward, Willie reveals that his methods are not based on science but (supposedly) an old Scottish way to hang sheep thieves and such.

Quick Review
Wow, what a mess of an episode.  First of all, the plot is short; the episode starts with a very lengthy couch gag featuring Rick & Morty, which lasted over two minutes.  There was another half-minute of filler at the end with the Simpsons playing hillbilly music for no apparent reason, detached from the rest of the episode.  The main episode was quite short.

It was also very bad, the worst episode of the season.  I can even make a claim that its one of the ten worst in the series thus far; it scored low enough to do so.  I was worried that, when previews suggested plenty of heavy math jokes, that they'd be too tryhard to be funny.  Well, there weren't that many math jokes, and they weren't too bad, some were pretty clever, but otherwise most of the comedy in the episode was sorely lacking in delivery, and humor.

The plot, as brief as it was, could barely hold itself together.  The first part of the episode was mostly references and "hey look at all this tech, we're tech-savy are we cool yet".  The middle portion was just dull and the last portion just dragged on in what felt like nothing more that simple plot progression.  Last episode was half of a disaster, this episode is definitely a full one.

Final Score: 4.0

Yellow Subterfuge (S25, E07-537)

Nothing is more fun for a mother than making her son believe she's dead!

Plot Summary
Principal Skinner, dreaming himself to be some kind of big shot, announces to the school that he will be hosting a special field trip: on board a nuclear submarine.  However, the field trip is forcibly limited to just a few students, whom Skinner will decide on based on students' behavior from this point forward.  Essentially on a clean slate, Bart decides to be on his best behavior so that he can get on that sub, despite both his family not believing in him and Skinner being very strict with taking students off "the list" for things as simple as letting gum fall on the floor.

Bart's determination hits a snag when the bus stalls on the way to school.  Fearing he'll be late and thus scratched off the list, Bart gets out and makes a mad dash to school.  He arrives just in time, but unfortunately runs in with muddy feet, giving Skinner enough reason to scratch Bart off his list.  Bart tries to get on the sub in other ways, first via a prank and later by good ol' fashioned sucking up, but Skinner leaves Bart off the field trip list regardless, leaving Bart to watch the submarine sink into the ocean depths.

Homer arrives in time to see Bart in distress and decides to help the boy enact some revenge.  The next morning, Skinner wakes up in his home to find his mother seemingly stabbed dead on the kitchen floor.  Homer and Bart conveniently arrive at his house to 'see' the scene and the two 'promise' to help Skinner out, though its obviously a ploy devised by Homer and Bart, with Agnes gladly helping out.  The two convince Skinner that letting the likes of Chief Wiggum figure the scene out is tantamount to suicide, and that leaving town is the only option, dressing him up as the disguised "Dick Fiddler" and seeing Skinner off on a bus.  Homer and Bart return home, mission accomplished, however Skinner is there, finding himself unable to flee so easily.  He's ready to take the blame for his 'crime', even admitting that deep down inside he wanted his mother to die anyway.  Marge has enough, and blows Bart's scheme, and Agnes comes in to reveal to Skinner that not only is she still alive, but she heard his admission and plans on being even meaner to him as a punishment.

Meanwhile, Krusty is broke (again), and Lisa witnesses repo men take his stuff away.  Lisa convinces Krusty to license his show globally so that other people can act like Krusty in their respective countries, and Krusty can earn some of each show's profits.  Krusty agrees to do so, and is able to get 75% of each international show's profits for each person to act like a regional Krusty.  Soon, though, each Krusty gains their share of fame, so much so that the original Krusty becomes the least popular of them all.  Those regional Krustys demand the original let them keep more of their earnings, but Krusty tries to appease them instead by promising to appear on each of their shows, which due to Krusty's lack of popularity, only drives them to chase him out away from wherever he is.

Quick Review
This was a pretty good episode, all things considered.  The couch gag wasn't stupidly long, the focus on Principal Skinner (and Krusty, less so) worked well for the most part, and I enjoyed Homer and Bart's role in the episode.  The only downer I felt the episode produced was the Jamaican Krusty bit, complete with a Jamaican "Itchum and Scratchum" thing that wasn't all that good, but that's a minor complaint for what was otherwise a decent episode.

Final Score: 7.6

Yolo (S25, E04-534)

Homer's storyline got kinda Looney Tunes, no, Merry Melodies at the end.

Plot Summary
As Homer and Marge wait for Milhouse to be picked up after spending the day with Bart, they notice Kirk Van Houten arriving in a new car, dressed like he doesn't care about anything.  Turns out, Kirk is now living by the "yolo" philosophy - you only live once, after all.  Marge and Homer mock Kirk later on, but as Marge openly states how happy she is that Homer is fine with living his boring old life day after day, Homer starts to get depressed that his life is, ignoring most episodes, boring.

Meanwhile, Principal Skinner is rocked when the local news finds rampant cheating being done by students at the school.  At a teachers-parents meeting Skinner is left unable to come up with any answers, but Lisa is able to come up with a simple solution: an honor system, where students vow not just to cheat on tests, but to also turn anybody in they catch cheating.  Lisa is able to trick students like Nelson and Martin into signing up for the system, and it seems like its an early success, with cheating now at all time lows.

Marge sees Homer sadly looking over some old letters - it turns out in 5th grade Homer had a pen pal from Spain he occasionally wrote to.  Tired of seeing Homer so depressed, Marge decides to contact the pen pal and have him cheer Homer up.  Soon, Eduardo, Homer's pen pal, arrives in Springfield to help Homer out.  It seems Eduardo lives by a similar "you only live once" philosophy and agrees to help Homer live out as many childhood dreams that he listed that are feasible.  After doing several, including riding a fire truck and portraying pirates in a play, it seems like the job is done, except for one last thing: gliding through the air like his childhood hero Rocky the squirrel.  Eduardo is somewhat hesitant to go through with this, but Homer wants no regrets, so the two ultimately get into a plain and glide-enabled jumpsuits to do just that.

After a push from Eduardo, Homer is in the air though he's having trouble getting stable.  Soon, with Eduardo's help, Homer is able to get it together and glide through the skies.  Nearby, Lisa learns Bart has still been cheating, and confronts him but Bart knows that Lisa won't turn him in, as that would mean Lisa's shiny new honor system actually failed.  Lisa goes mad from the dilemma, but some time later comes up with a solution: force Bart to turn himself in instead.  Homer, meanwhile, has now flown into Springfield itself and unfortunately glides right into the town's tallest building, causing him to fall.  He recovers, but hits the building again, forcing him to fall for sure this time.  During this, Lisa tries to get Bart to turn himself in, but Bart agrees to only do so if he's given a sign from God.  Moments later, Homer falls right on top of Bart.  Bart agrees to turn himself in, keeping Lisa's honor system working, and Homer is glad Eduardo was able to help him live a full life.

Quick Review
How long was "yolo" mainstream popular again?  Like, a month?  A couple of weeks?  It was a flash-in-the-pan twitter meme, but yet someone decided it would be a good idea to write an episode centered around the idea even though by the time it aired, everyone would be sick of "yolo" to the point of derision.  You'd think lessons would be learned, but alas that would be too good to be true.

The episode itself is alright.  The brief appearance of the Jon Lovitz-voiced Llewellyn Sinclair was appreciated and a few of the gags were pretty decent.  The cheating subplot was the funnier of the storylines, and it a big reason why the episode scored as well as it did.  The main plot with Homer and Eduardo was mostly boring, centering around a minute-long fad, and did nothing to really make this episode any funnier.

Final Score: 7.1

A Test Before Trying (S24, E10-518)

Yes, this definitely beats school any day of the week.

Plot Summary
Mr. Burns hikes up the electricity bill by 17%, forcing many people to make electricity-related cutbacks to save money.  This includes the school district, which decides to close down a school to save money, deciding to choose the school based on how low they score on a standardized test.  Naturally, those at Springfield Elementary are especially worried.  Those fears are realized when, even with Lisa and Martin Prince there, the passing average at the school just falls into last place.  The next day, as kids are being reassigned to new districts, Bart shows up, revealing he skipped school the previous day to mess with a bug and thus never took the test.  Lisa tells the staff that the school can still be saved if Bart is able to pass the test.  Naturally, those at Springfield Elementary resign to their fates.

Meanwhile, Homer is forced to trash some electronics at the dump, where he comes across a rare find: a working parking meter, with a key to access coins inside.  Ecstatic, Homer takes the 90 pound item back with him and quickly starts up a scam to trick people into putting quarters into it.  Soon, Homer amasses a bag with $50 worth of quarters.  However, Homer is found out by the police and during the getaway, Homer crashes, dealing enough damage to the parking meter to render it inoperable.  After mourning his loss, Homer goes home, only for Marge to find out about his bag of quarters.  Marge insists this change be used for "change for the better", but Homer ends up wishing all of the quarters on a wishing well, wishing for many, many things.

The school prepares for Bart's test, headed by a test official who cares not for most things.  Realizing Bart isn't ready, Skinner is coerced into pulling a fire alarm, delaying Bart's test by a full day.  Bart, though, ends up not studying at all.  Lisa tries to talk some sense into him, but Bart falls asleep, having a dream that's far more convincing than Lisa would've been.  Bart realizes he's gotta study, but when that effort fails, Lisa shares with Bart test taking strategies, including picking B when he's not sure about an answer.  The test finally happens, and Bart is barely making it, but comes across the final question where he's unsure as to what to do.  Just as time runs out, the bug Bart had messed with earlier crawls out of his shirt and onto the test sheet, sitting on the final question's correct answer: C.  The test official scores the test on the spot and thanks to the final answer being "correct", Bart passes the test and the school is saved.

Quick Review
This was a fairly boring episode.  The side plot with Homer's parking meter provided the most laughs as the main plot really didn't do much good for comedy.

Final Score: 6.4

The Book Job (S23, E06-492)

"I don't get the reference... was that supposed to be funny?" I said just one review ago.

Plot Summary
The family attends a show about dinosaurs when Lisa notices someone half-in-costume that looks awfully familiar.  After chasing the person down, Lisa recognizes the person as the author of her beloved Angelica Button books.  As Lisa is confused as to why her favorite author is bothering to dress up as a dinosaur, the woman reveals that she was a model whose picture was taken to set up a fake author for the books, and that the book was actually conceived by publishers who use reader trends and dozens of desperate English majors to develop books that are most likely to sell.  Lisa is shocked by the revelation and runs off crying.

Determined to now burn her set of books, Lisa tells Homer about the conspiracy, and Homer comes to realize how profitable it can be.  He quickly assembles a team featuring Bart, a pro at cons, Skinner who knows all about preteen trends, Patty who knows all about fantasy novels, Moe who has some publishing experience and Professor Frink the "computer guy".  As the group begins to brainstorm they realize they probably shouldn't do yet another dreamy vampire theme as that has already saturated the market so instead they make their story about trolls.  The idea gains the praise of a snooping Neil Gaiman who joins the group as an errand boy.  Lisa learns of the scheme and, angered, decides to write a book of her own, but constantly procrastinates.  By the time Homer's groups finishes the final draft of their book, Lisa still hasn't written anything besides "Chapter 1".

The group goes to a publisher to get the book published, but they've made a critical mistake: they never came up with a fake author to sell the book with.  Luckily, Lisa has become so distraught over her failure that she'll do anything to get her name on a book and she happily becomes that which she hated to that end.  The group receives a million dollar check, and all is well.  The group except Lisa celebrates their victory... until they get an advance copy of the book which reveals that their troll characters and themes have been replaced by vampires.  Realizing that while they initially set out for money, they've become so enriched in the world they've developed that they can't deal with it being destroyed by the book publisher.  Angered by this, the group tears up their check and decides to take matters into their own hands.

The team sneaks into the publishing area where they plan on swapping the vampire mock up with the original story on a flash drive moments before printing begins.  However, they get found out as Lisa ratted the group out to the publisher, desperate to see her name on a book regardless of its content.  The publisher gives Lisa the clear to print the material, and all seems lost.  However, the next day the group is stunned to find stores being stocked with the troll version of their story: it seems Lisa switched flash drives with Bart while asking for his forgiveness, thus secretly restoring the original tale.  The group is happy to see people enjoying their original vision, though Lisa is angered to find that the book has been credited not to her, but to Neil Gaiman, now on some island who revealed that he, too, switched flash drives at some point and is joyous that he can enjoy being credited for another successful book despite not even being literate.

Quick Review
It was hard for me to get into this episode as, and I just spent the last episode lamenting this, most of the episode was set up as one big reference and I hardly found any of it funny though Neil Gaiman did a pretty decent job in his role.

Final Score: 5.7

Bart Stops to Smell the Roosevelts (S23, E02-488)

All hail President Roosevelt!  May his four years be full of conquest!

Plot Summary
Bart's latest prank leaves Principal Skinner looking like a fool during a school auction.  Frustrated, Skinner isn't willing to deal with Superintendent Chalmers' usual remarks.  Instead, Skinner lashes out against Chalmers, insisting he try teaching Bart once to see what hell he goes through everyday.  Chalmers casually agrees, though in a private moment he needs to get himself together, not having actually taught in quite some time.

Chalmers meets up with Bart at the library, and though Chalmers has trouble getting Bart to care about Presidents at first, the wise Superintendent gets Bart to focus on a specific one: Theodore Roosevelt, who led quite the wild life in his day.  Bart becomes completely engrossed in the life of the first President Roosevelt, and to supplement Bart's learning, Chalmers takes Bart out to a park founded by Roosevelt.  Bart recounts the tales of ol' Teddy to Milhouse, Nelson, Jimbo and Dolph, and they all want to be taught by Chalmers instead.

Chalmers is happy to see so many boys take an interest in Roosevelt, especially as he believes that public schools have become too wrapped up in teaching feelings instead.  He takes the five boys camping in hopes of uncovering a pair of spectacles worn by the President.  On that trip, Nelson finds the glasses while hanging off the edge of a cliff, but it gives way and Nelson takes a small yet painful fall.  Later, Nelson's mom threatens to sue the school for Nelson's injuries and as Chalmers took the boys on an unapproved trip, the comptroller relieves Chalmers of his duties.

Bart finds regular school boring again, and finds a defeated Chalmers hard to talk to.  Soon, Bart gathers up the "Brotherhood of the Spectacles", which includes himself, the four other boys as well as Kearney now, to come up with a plan to get Chalmers' job back.  Bart's plan is simple: take over the school and not relinquish it until Chalmers is hired again.  The operation goes rather smoothly as Bart is able to convince Skinner and every teacher to go outside to check on their equally pathetic cars.  As the boys threaten to ruin an expensive photocopier should Skinner try to break in, the police are brought in to end the standoff.  Chalmers then appears and tries to convince the boys to stand down, but they hold their ground.  Chief Wiggum is about to storm the school, but fumbles his gun and it shoots the comptroller in the knee.  The comptroller willingly gives Chalmers a better version of his job back, and Chalmers is back making Skinner feel bad again.  Chalmers and Bart go on another ride through Roosevelt's park, probably friends or something.

Quick Review
Not that long ago, I lamented over the change of Superintendent Chalmers' character, how even a character such as him that was introduced as being so normal could also succumb to be a caricature of his former self.  For the most part, this episode does a better job treating Chalmers' character right aside from a couple of odd Skinner-related moments.  The humor is also much improved from the previous episode, but there some sketchy moments as well that held the episode back a bit.  Overall, its still nothing special in terms of comedy but I appreciate the effort of an episode that focuses on Chalmers and doing it decently well.

Final Score: 6.9

500 Keys (S22, E21-485)

How did they even get some of those keys, like the school key?

Plot Summary
Homer takes the kids out to buy a returned wedding cake for cheap, but after returning home he accidentally leaves Maggie in the car, locked, with the keys.  Marge empties out a drawer full of keys hoping to find the car's spare, but Maggie is somehow able to exit the car on her own and return inside the house.  With panic subsided, the family takes a look at all the keys they have, and decide to do whatever with them.  Bart takes a handful of keys in hopes of committing pranks, but every attempt of his ends up doing the community good, which he hates.  Homer has the keys to the Duff Brewery somehow, so he and Barney sneak in, going to the back of the brewery where the blimp is.  Barney tricks Homer into thinking the blimp wants him inside, and Homer quickly steals the blimp and flies off into the sky.

Lisa finds a key to the school, and runs off to return it.  She's stopped by Nelson, who convinces her to live a little, and figure out what the key opens before returning it.  Lisa looks around the building, and sees three odd door side by side: Banned Books, Band Books, and Banned Band Books.  Lisa's key ends up opening the latter door, and she goes inside to find a strange sight: a large classroom that seems impressive at first, but none of the materials within are actually legitimate.  Lisa talks to Principal Skinner about the room, but when the two, along with a bunch of kids, go to the door, the path to the room is replaced by a bookcase, leaving Lisa stunned.

With Superintendent Chalmers apparently part of the cover up, Skinner is able to grab Lisa's key, and Lisa is left unable to solve the mystery.  Luckily, the school paper took a photo of Lisa holding the key, so she uses it to have a duplicate key made to reopen that door.  She busts down the bookcase and re-enters the room, where a mysterious stranger writes on the chalkboard about "the children of bus 23".  Bart, whose tired of his key adventure, teams up with Lisa at this point and has her talk to someone who has been at the school for a long time: the often held back Nelson.  Nelson does recall a bus 23, where on a wintry morning Chalmers forces Skinner to send off that bus through an ice bridge for the sake of time even though it'd likely be too heavy to cross.  Homer arrives in the blimp on coincidence, and the two decide to have Homer take them there.

Homer, of course, can't really operate blimps, so as they reach the river where bus 23 supposedly met its fate, Lisa ends up falling out of the blimp, and into the water where she finds the bus with the kids still inside.  Homer jumps in after her, but he knocks the bus on its side, allowing the bodies to float up through the window.  Quickly, the two realize that these aren't dead kids, but actually mannequins.  However, the two are quickly swarmed by the mannequins and are forced underwater.  Thankfully, another key side story where Marge puts a wind-up key in a moving flatulence toy comes to fruition, as the "Pooter Toot Express" hits an old tree which falls and creates a bridge Homer and Lisa can grab onto.

With the demise of the toy, Marge and Maggie meet up with the rest of the family.  Across the river, Lisa spies the mysterious man she had seen earlier, which turns out to be Otto, who drove the bus to its grave.  Otto is relieved upon learning the kids were only mannequins, and the family decides to bring the mystery to an end.  Skinner and Chalmers attempt to escape, but Bart is able to steal Skinner's car keys, forcing the two to reveal the truth.  Years ago, the school was given a government grant to improve the school.  Skinner cashed the check but the money he put in his pocket was lost when his mother washed his jeans.  Fearing the feds would go after them, the two along with Willie set up a fake classroom with mannequins to fool the feds into thinking they did spend the money wisely.  However, they were only renting the mannequins, so they had to return them quickly, which is why Chalmers risked using the ice bridge route.  Of course, the two never counted on the future Simpsons locking their baby in the car which would lead to them uncovering the keys to the mystery.  Later, Otto, still relieved he didn't kill any kids, now is under the delusion the current group of kids he's carrying are also mannequins as the bus falls into the river.

Quick Review
With a heavy emphasis on storytelling, the episode doesn't have much of a chance to build on comedy, though early on it looked like it would with Bart's and Homer's stories before the focus is put on Lisa's conspiracy story which, mostly, was unfunny.  This ends up as one of the weakest entries to the season.

As an aside, I want to take a moment to mention the character of Superintendent Chalmers.  Originally, the guy was played as a straight man to Skinner's tomfoolery, whom Chalmers tolerated none of.  His main role back in the day would be to critique the scared Principal and his school, which would usually go wrong once Bart pulls off a prank, leaving Skinner in Chalmers' dog house.  It was a gag that worked well, but since then Chalmers' character has changed tremendously.  Nowadays, he's a shell of his former self.  Him yelling out "Skinner!" isn't used as an angry yell to shake up an already shaken Principal, but rather yet another catchphrase that's used only for that purpose.  Further, Chalmers is now often used as Skinner's partner-in-crime in many instances.  It first become really noticeable a few seasons ago, where "Chalmskin" productions hurt the episode more than helped, and that combination didn't help this episode any either.  Chalmers is at his best when he's actually angry at Skinner for one reason or another, not to team up with Skinner to cover up something or working together to earn the school money.

Final Score: 6.2

A Midsummer's Nice Dream (S22, E16-480)

Life will never be this groovy again...

Plot Summary
On TV, Kent Brockman reflects on the careers of the celebrated Cheech and Chong, who are going to be in Springfield for a show coming up.  As Brockman reveals "Richard Marin" and "Thomas Chong" were once Channel 6 meteorologists who got their first whiff of fun from an unrelated event outside, Homer is stunned to learn his kids don't know who the two are (Bart also claims ignorance on Beavis & Butthead, even though that show has premiered, ended and recently come back throughout the entire existence of The Simpsons).  Homer was a big fan of the two back when they were big, and Marge was okay with them I guess, so the family goes to see their live show.  Homer and the rest of the crowd gets excited when the duo start their "Dave's not here" bit, but Chong has gotten tired of the repetitiveness, and gets into an argument with Cheech about trying to experiment and not selling out.  The argument eventually reaches a head, and Chong just ups and leaves.  With the show in the balance, Marge convinces Homer, who has remembered every line from the duo's antics, to go up and finish the act with Cheech, which proves to be a pot-influenced success.

Cheech is impressed with Homer's act, and invites him to tour with him across the country.  As "Cheech and Chunk", Homer is excited by this at first, but slowly he comes to learn that Cheech the person is not like Cheech the character.  Real life Cheech cares about making sure the show is perfect, while valuing his cultural heritage, things Homer just can not believe.  Meanwhile, Chong tries to start up a new act, bringing along Principal Skinner as his new partner, as Chong believes him with the unfunniest person there is could create a mindblowing show.  Calling the act "Teech and Chong", the show takes a rather deep look into the fact Dave is actually there, but the show is universally hated.

Meanwhile, Marge and Lisa take the dog for a walk, but it runs off chasing after a cat.  Running into a house, the dog leads the women to the house of the crazy cat lady.  Full of clutter and garbage, its quickly realized that the cat lady is a massive hoarder, and Marge takes it upon herself to clean up the mess.  Sending the cat lady to a movie, Marge along with a team go in and clean up the woman's house, leaving it sparkling clean.  Not only is the cat lady's house cleared, so too is her mind.  As the cat lady regains her sanity, Marge starts taking an interest in some of the clutter that was cleaned up, opting to keep it for herself.  In no time, Bart and Lisa return home to find the house full of garbage, and Marge has become a massive hoarder herself.  Lisa tries to call Homer for help, but Cheech is forcing Homer to continue a rehearsal and he's unable to answer.

Homer does answer eventually and finds a moment to escape Cheech's iron grip to return home.  Homer confronts Marge over her hoarding, bringing in the sane no-cat lady to talk with Marge.  However, the woman becomes enveloped in her garbage again and quickly devolves, calling back both her cats and her insanity.  Homer takes Marge out of the house, under the premise that things will work itself out with a crazy lady inside, and they leave.  The two go back to Cheech, but Homer brings along another person: Chong, who has realized that people just like their classics, for better or worse.  Cheech also comes to terms that its okay to go outside the box every now and then as well.  The two reunite, and things work out for the best.

Quick Review
This is one of the best episodes of the season.  I may be old enough to predate The Simpsons, but I'm still not old enough to remember Cheech and Chong in their prime.  Even so, the pair provide excellent guest spots for the episode, and the bits with "Cheech and Chunk" were excellent.  The hoarding side story has its moments, but nothing too notable, but for the most part the main plot of the episode was pretty good, though the end with Bart as the Shakespeare character Puck (referencing the episode's title) was too odd to be of any worth.

Final Score: 7.9

Flaming Moe (S22, E11-475)

For gathering the courage to try and kiss that thing, lets give applause to Waylon Smithers.

Not to be confused with the similarly titled Season 3 episode Flaming Moe's.

Plot Summary
Smithers is stunned to learn he's been left out of Mr. Burns' will.  Confronting Burns later, Smithers is told that because he's always been a follower, and has never been independent, Burns can't respect Smithers.  Torn by these revelations, Smithers tries to go to a bar for a drink.  However, a popular gay bar refuses him entry just from his looks.  Dejected further, Smithers goes to the bar across the street: Moe's.  As Smithers laments over a lack of a gay bar for regular guys, he notices that business is once again slow at Moe's, and comes up with an idea.  Smithers suggests to Moe that the two spruce the place up and turn into a gay bar.  Moe is initially hesitant, but given his only other customer at the moment is Barney, Moe decides to give it a try.

Once a lazy montage, the new bar is open for business, and Smithers is able to convince several gay men to come to it.  One of them, the school's music teacher Mr. Largo, finds a 'soulmate' there and the two decide to leave town for a bit.  To take his place at school, Superintendent Chalmers brings in a free spirited woman Calliope Juniper.  Principal Skinner eventually meets the woman and immediately falls in love.  Skinner calls in Bart for a favor: Calliope has a daughter named Melody, and he'd like Bart to take her someplace, and Skinner can chaperon Bart to meet Calliope.  Bart agrees to do so with some conditions, and Skinner's plan ultimately works like a charm, as the two go back to Calliope's place for the night.  However, Bart really can't stand Melody and before the rather obsessed Melody can get too close to him, Bart breaks up with her.  Calliope gets upset over this and decides to move out of town, but asks Skinner to come with her regardless of whether their relationship lasts for just one more day or a lifetime.  With that mindset, Skinner decides to go with them.

Meanwhile, Moe's new bar is work out pretty well, and Moe hopes it doesn't turn out like the other past, failed attempts at reimagining his bar.  As "Mo's" becomes popular, Smithers does receive the respect he desired from Burns.  However, Moe starts getting popular among his new patrons under the notion that Moe is also gay.  Moe picks up on this, but keeps up the charade to maintain his popularity.  Smithers doesn't like this, and on more than one occasion tries to get Moe to tell the truth about his preferences, but when patrons decide to let Moe run for a spot in the town council so that they can have a voice in government, Smithers reaches a boiling point.  Moe meets several groups out in public, but Smithers confronts Moe, and reveals to the truth to the stunned crowd.  Moe tries to defend himself, but Smithers forces Moe to prove his orientation... by kissing him.  Moe can't bring himself to do, and as he's likely running against a closeted gay Republican, he loses all of his support.  With nothing to lose (and nobody else around), Moe decides to kiss Smithers now, with no regrets.  Skinner also comes back, admitting that his relationship with Calliope lasted just one more day, though he's been gone for three months.

Quick Review
This was an episode that started off rather well, but fell apart at about the time where the Skinner subplot started up.  There was hardly anything about that side story that was even close to funny, and it brought the rest of the episode down.  The main plot also started to lose its steam as the episode shifted focus from Smithers to Moe, leaving it as one of the season's weaker episodes thus far.

Final Score: 6.7

Stealing First Base (S21, E15-456)

When one assumes the role of Bart Simpson, one must assume all of the risks.

Plot Summary
Mrs. Krabappel is away for a few days, but as the school can't afford a substitute, her 4th grade class merges with the other 4th grade for the interim.  As Nelson ends up befriending a blind boy, the adventures of which are touched upon throughout the episode, Bart sits next to Nikki, a girl whom Bart is able to befriend.  Bart also has feelings for her, but going to Homer yields no advice other than to talk to Grampa about women.  So, Bart gets advice from Grampa to 'steal' a kiss from Nikki to gauge how interested she really is toward him.  The next day, Bart does so, but Nikki is left disgusted by the act.  Soon, Nikki's parents, both of whom are uptight lawyers, threaten to sue both the school and Bart's parents if measures aren't taken to prevent PDAs at the school.  Superintendent Chalmers and Principal Skinner are forced to comply, and Homer and Marge are forced to prevent Bart from seeing Nikki again.  However, once the ban is in place, Nikki sees and subsequently kisses Bart herself, confusing the hell out of him.  Still, he doesn't mind kissing, and the two are together again, I guess.

Meanwhile, Lisa is given an F on her test.  As she begins to think about doomsday scenarios, she starts noticing people are starting to like her because of the F she got.  However, Ms. Hoover tells Lisa in front of everyone that the F was actually for Ralph and Lisa actually got an A+++.  Now everyone hates her again.  Lisa complains about it on her organic gardening blog where she gets a rather quick reply to keep in good spirits from a "Flotus1".  Some time later, a helicopter flies in, revealing the first lady of the United States - Michelle Obama (voiced by someone else, though).  Michelle points out Lisa, as 'Flotus' is an acronym for "First Lady of the United States" and therefore is an avid follower of Lisa's blog, and tells everyone not to mess with the academics because they'll rule the world when they grow up and you don't want to be on their list.

As the helicopter leaves, Bart and Nikki are on the roof, and while they enjoyed that moment, Bart tries to imply the two are a couple, which Nikki can't stand the thought of.  Bart has enough and tries to leave before she hurts him, but bumps into an air duct and falls off the building.  He's unconscious and having trouble breathing, but nobody in the school can give Bart CPR because of the ban on PDAs.  Nikki makes her way towards Bart anyway and gives him CPR anyway, saving Bart's life maybe.  The ban on PDAs is lifted, and Nikki remains hot and cold to Bart, who still has no idea what's going on.

Quick Review
So, this was a poor episode.  It really gives off a, I dunno, a feeling of disconnect.  Between Michelle Obama appearing telling kids to be friends with the smart kids, to the Itchy & Scratchy movie cartoon fully parodying a 'deep' cult movie, to the cliched main storyline complete with oversensitive lawyer parents, the entire episode seemed really out of place even compared to other episodes of this season, and it was difficult finding anything even worth a smirk, Nelson's tertiary story and Grampa's appearance being the closest things to humor there was.

Final Score: 5.7

Postcards from the Wedge (S21, E14-455)

Marge can't believe Homer is forcing Bart through that Desk Reference book.

Plot Summary
Bart misses another homework assignment and, despite his best efforts to prevent it, a letter is sent home which Homer reads indicating Bart's lack of homework completion.  Meeting with Principal Skinner, Homer is more than willing to pile on missing assignments for Bart to catch up on, but Marge is more merciful, believing it too much for a 4th grade boy to handle.  Those concerns continue at home; as Homer forces Bart to focus on his homework, a short time later Marge tells Bart just to do a couple more problems then take a break.  Bart describes this inconsistency to Lisa during his break, and she tells him that people who agree on most things can have one thing to disagree over which is normally called a wedge issue.  Bart decides to exploit this as much as he can.

Bart sneaks away whenever he gets Marge to let his ease up on his homework.  As the days continue, Marge becomes stubbornly convinces she's doing the right thing, and openly tells Homer his strict method is wrong.  The two begin arguing over all sorts of other things as spill over, and Bart is reaping the rewards as he is no longer their concern.  Homer and Marge fight really badly that night, and stay intensely mad at one another the next day though as they day goes along they get to talking and thinking and realize staying mad at each other is no good.  Homer and Marge find each other and quickly reconcile.  They realize Bart was trying to tear them apart and that until they iron out their differences, Bart can just fend for himself.

They start this practice right away, not giving a single care what Bart plans to do, despite trying to tell them while holding a suspicious bag of equipment.  A short time later, Bart and Milhouse pull a prank on Principal Skinner, and flee to an abandoned subway system Milhouse had found earlier.  The two get into a train and find out, amazingly, it still works, much to the shock of people above ground as the train causes tremors across town.  Despite that, Homer and Marge still don't care about what Bart did or might be connected to.  This really bothers Bart, and Nelson tells him his pranks aren't satisfying unless he gets in trouble from his parents.  Bart decides to pull off something so big not even his parents can ignore it, when he learns the earthquake has weakened the school's foundation, with another tremor likely causing it to collapse.

Lisa overhears Bart's conversation with Nelson (though not the part where Bart decides on the school), and soon a letter is written to Homer and Marge from Lisa warning about Bart's plan.  Homer rushes into the subway and is able to stop the train in its tracks just before the school crumbles (though a falling flagpole, implied to be rigged by Nelson and Mrs. Krabappel, finishes the job).  Homer and even Marge punish Bart severely for this, but Bart is happy to have the attention again.  Lisa talks to Bart, revealing that she didn't write that note and it contains the same misspellings commonly found in Bart's writing, though Bart doesn't particularly care.

Quick Review
This wasn't really a funny episode.  There's a few decent moments throughout, but for the most part the comedy fell flat.

Final Score: 6.5

Boy Meets Curl (S21, E12-453)

That passion.  That dedication.  That effort.

Plot Summary
Its date night for Homer and Marge, but Homer is forced to stay late at work.  When Homer eventually gets home they don't have much time left in the night, and the movie they planned on seeing has Ben Affleck in it, so that's a no go either.  Driving around, the two spot a skating rink they could spend time at, but upon entering they find that the skating rink is closed.  Upon further inspection, they find a group of people playing the ever obscure sport of curling.  Principal Skinner and his mother are both there as well, and they invite Homer and Marge to give it a try.  With Homer's bowling experience and Marge's sweeping experience, the two decide to give it a try and quickly fall in love with the sport.

Some months pass, and the two have become experienced curlers.  Skinner stops by to let them know that they've been invited to the Olympic curling trials for mixed demonstration curling.  At the event, it becomes apparent that Homer's poor curling throws are made up for Marge's godly sweeping abilities, and with her able to make up for any of Homer's mistakes, they and the Skinners become the U.S. representatives for the 2010 Winter Olympics in Vancouver.

While all this is happening, Lisa gets tricked into becoming addicted to Olympic pin collecting.  Soon, Lisa spies a rare pin she must have, but running low on funds she gives the guy her pearl necklace instead.  While in Vancouver, Bart sees Lisa playing her sax on the street for money and sees just how addicted to pin collecting she's gotten: her entire dress is made out of pins.  Bart helps her break her addiction by giving up her pins, then creates a fake pin made partly from Homer's driver's license face to give to the vendor as "Fatoff", the newly created mascot pin for the 2014 Winter Olympics.  The vendor falls in love with it and gives Bart the pearls.

At the Olympics, Agnes tries to convince Marge to kick Homer off the team, but she refuses to do so, citing that curling has helped their marriage tremendously.  Homer overhears this but doesn't really do anything particular to improve his skill.  In the semi-final match, Homer makes another poor throw, but Marge is able to sweep like no one has ever swept before to get the rock in the middle, but separates her right shoulder in the process.  The team makes the gold medal match, but with Marge's new injury they'll have no chance of winning against the rather bleak Swedish team.

The family starts to pack up when Homer notices Marge is very capable with her left hand.  She reveals to Homer that she's really left-handed and that she pretended to be right handed to avoid looking unusual.  However, Homer realizes this means she can still sweep, and the two quickly prevent Skinner from signing a concession form so that the gold medal match can be played.  Sure enough, with Marge now sweeping with her main hand, the United States wins its only medal of the Olympics: mixed demonstration curling gold.  During the ceremony, Homer and Marge admit this has been one pretty good date night.

Quick Review
Well, this was a weird episode.  For the most part, it seemed like an advertisement for curling, though the version that was shown in this episode isn't even the same type as the curling often broadcasted in the real Olympics.  As this was mostly an advertisement for a lesser-known version of curling, the opportunity for comedy was limited and while Lisa's pin story actually helps the episode quite a bit, the main story would be really forgettable if it couldn't be remembered as "that curling episode".

Final Score: 6.4

Pranks and Greens (S21, E06-447)

If Lisa flips her hand, she'd get what she was this episode: a big Jerk.

Plot Summary
Bart and Milhouse commit another series of pranks at school, but Principal Skinner catches Bart and puts him through a variety of punishments.  Still, Skinner admits, the stuff Bart pulls doesn't compare to a prank pulled by a previous student.  Bart wants to find out more about this mystery kid but Skinner refuses to talk more about it.  Bart gets Lisa's help to investigate further and learns that something happened several years ago, stricken from the record, which turned a previously fun Seymour Skinner into the shill he is now.  Bart figures out Willie was around at the time, so he questions him.  Willie reveals that, ten years ago, he was a swim coach at the school, which had a pool in the back.  One evening, the fun loving Skinner goes out to take a dive into the pool, going into the high up springboard and failing to see what was actually in it until it was too late: Skinner drove right into a pool filled completely with worms.  The mystery student then covered the pool, preventing Skinner to escape and, because it was a Friday evening and school was out Monday, Skinner wasn't rescued until Tuesday, where then-swim coach Willie is instructed by the rescued yet adversely changed Skinner to bury the pool.  Willie reveals the kid's name as Andy Hamilton and makes Bart keep it a secret.

Still, Bart visits Andy, now 19, still as big a prankster as ever.  Bart tells Lisa about Andy, how he does nothing except live with his mom, which prompts Lisa to proclaim Andy and his big fan Bart as losers.  Bart initially protests but does realize that Andy is wasting his life away.  The next day, Bart makes Andy realize that as well and promises to get Andy a job with Krusty the Klown, having perjured himself to aid the clown.  Andy agrees and starts work as Krusty's lowly assistant.  Andy can't deal with it, quits the same day, and winds up outside of Bart's house for some reason, gaining his scorn and Lisa's continued mocking.

Bart gets Andy's job back and insists Andy just deal with it instead.  A week passes and things seem okay, so Bart visits Andy at the studio when he notices a truck full of prank-quality worms being brought in.  Bart fears the worst and rushes into the studio, finding Krusty about to jump into a small pool full of worms.  Fearing Andy has struck another prank, Bart tries to save Krusty but ultimately fails.  Krusty falls into the pool, but comes out ready with a worm related joke.  It turns out Andy did set this up, as a gag for Krusty to use as Krusty has made Andy his lead writer.  Bart wonders how Andy could've improved so quickly, learning the answer once Andy's new girlfriend comes to meet him.  Lisa sees this on TV and, after learning Andy is a comedy writer now, continues to declare him a loser.

Oh, there was also a side story where Marge is shamed by other mothers for using chemically infused foods.  To combat their criticisms Marge starts buying only organic foods.  She tries to show this off to them, but now the mothers are even more upset that Marge uses cookware and plastic bottles containing other deadly chemicals.  Marge grows tired of this and gorges herself on Homer's stash of food she finds.  Homer learns of this and gets turned on, so the two end up making love or pigging out on food or doing both, I dunno.

Quick Review
The main portion of the episode featuring Bart and Andy was fairly strong with great use of several characters early on.  The strength of that storyline makes it one of the best non-Halloween episodes in some time.  The Marge plotline was pretty forgettable, though, and its a shame that it got tossed into this otherwise quality affair.  Those oversensitive parents not only tried to drag Marge down to their level, they tried to drag my enjoyment of the episode down as well.  Still, a good return to form for the show.

Final Score: 8.0

Bart Gets a Z (S21, E02-443)

He should've looked online for self-help, didn't Zack teach him anything?

Plot Summary
Its another typical day in Edna Krabappel's life, but she's still dedicated to teaching her class something every day.  This is made extremely more difficult nowadays as every kids in her class liberally uses their cell phones, phones they have for good reason ('safety') but aren't being used as such.  Tired of them, Krabappel forces the class to give her their phones.  After school, the kids gather up to complain about the strict Edna, where Bart takes a cue from Homer and decides that if Edna had some alcohol in her, she'd be more fun.  The kids steal some booze from their parents, and Bart mixes all of it together with some Hazelnut creamer to mask the taste, and slips it into her coffee.  Within a short period of time Edna gets pretty wasted and makes a public fool of herself across school.

Principal Skinner has no choice but to fire Edna for the incident.  The class feels bad about it, and Bart is ready to admit his wrongdoing, but just then a new teacher comes in.  The guy, who lets the class just call him Zack, is fresh out of college and tries to teach students how to master technology to gather their facts instead of just learning or memorizing them.  Still, Bart feels a little guilty and visits Mrs. Krabappel at her apartment.  Edna is in a miserable state, with bills piling up and having no sense of effort anymore.  Bart wants to help Edna out, but he and everyone else loves Zack so much he doesn't really want her to be a teacher again.  Just then, a woman advertises a self help book disguised as an epic quest called "The Answer" and Bart goes all in on it.  He details the book to Edna, and she decides to give it a try because, really, she doesn't have much else doing on.  The book has her write down her dream, to own a muffin store, and with some help from Bart the two are able to start up a muffin store.  Bart is relieved Edna is back on her feet, but lets that much slip out, making Edna suspicious.  Bart relents and tells Edna that he was the one who spiked her coffee that day.  Edna goes off, stating that her real dream was to be a teacher and, worse yet, tells Bart he has nothing good inside of him.

That last statement really gets to Bart, and he starts contemplating whether to get Zack fired to let Edna back in.  Late at night, Bart sneaks into class to sneak booze into Zack's favorite energy drink, but eventually opts against doing so.  The next morning, Bart simply tells Skinner what he did.  Skinner thanks Bart for his honesty (by punishing him severely), but tells him that as long as Zack is competent he has no plans to replace him with Edna.  However, just then Zack blares out anti-kid sentiments out in the hallways.  It turns out he's getting drunk from his spiked energy drink.  Bart didn't do it, however, as it was Zack himself who had snapped, poured vodka into his drink himself, and is dragged off yelling out typical conspiracy theories and such.  Edna is given her job back, and gives the class her old, stale muffin as a sly payback for what they did to her earlier.

Quick Review
Early in my run of episodes I came across a few episodes that I felt were dated.  Homer vs. Lisa and the 8th Commandment is a good example of this.  I always though it a little weird whenever the show even mentions newer technology for whatever reason.  At one point Homer tries to start up an Internet company despite having no idea what the Internet even was, then in a much later episode Homer uses the Internet to easily acquire a license.  I mean, yeah, it sounds silly to let such things bother me considering that the show even precedes Windows 3.0, but that's how it is.

So from that, the sight of seeing the kids all using cell phones to text and, hell, even tweet, really just bugs me.  Not enough to hurt the episode's already low score in anyway, but its still bothersome for me regardless.

Anyway, my personal preferences aside, this ends up being another subpar episode where the comedy is lacking.  The whole bit with glorifying "The Answer" didn't do anything for me, and plot had stretches where there was nothing funny.

Final Score: 6.3

Gone Maggie Gone (S20, E13-433)

Yeah, uh huh, sure, whatever.

Plot Summary
Springfield is a recipient of the ever-rare solar eclipse, and the Simpson family builds makeshift boxes to see the event safely.  Homer's is ruined, though, so Marge gives him hers.  The eclipse occurs, and the family is greatly enjoying this occasion.  Marge can't deal with being left out, and decides to see the eclipse dead on, just as sunlight begins to peek back out.  Marge's eyes suffer tremendous damage as a result, and so Marge is blinded, being forced to wear bandages over her eye for two weeks and must avoid all stress at any cost.

To make matters difficult, rats decide to infest the Simpson kitchen right then.  Homer goes to buy some poison, bringing Maggie and the dog along for no apparent reason.  Homer later laments his decision to bring the two as both cause chaos for him within the car on the way back.  Homer drives off a bridge and lands on a spot near a river he needs to cross.  There's a boat nearby, however it can't support him, Maggie, the dog and the rat poison all at once.  Homer comes up with a solution to his puzzle, and decides to row Maggie first to the other side, leaving her at a nearby convent so he can continue his puzzle solving.  However, the convent quickly takes Maggie in while Homer is rowing back.  Homer tries to get the nuns there to give her back, but they refuse.

Back home, Homer tells the kids what happened, and agree not to stress out Marge with this information.  Lisa decides that someone has to disguise themselves as a nun and infiltrate the convent to find Maggie.  Lisa agrees to be that person.  She's admitted in as a nun, but she can't seem to find Maggie anywhere.  A rather withered nun tells Lisa that the mystery of Maggie's location is linked to the mystery of a jewel, and Lisa decides the undergo the challenge of determining where this mystical jewel is located so that she can find Maggie.

As Homer and Bart try to keep the blinded Marge unaware of both Maggie's and Lisa's unavailability, Lisa goes across town as she continues to figure out the puzzles she's come across, the latest one asking her to find the biggest 'ring' in Springfield.  Lisa is interrupted by the comic book guy and Principal Skinner, both of whom have also taken an interest in the jewel.  The comic book guy expands on the history of the jewel, which includes nuns going overseas to find it, and even a staged revolutionary war by Freemasons to find the jewel, which will bring peace to Springfield on the first full moon after a solar eclipse.  As that happens to be the current night, Lisa realizes that the biggest ring in Springfield is the giant SpRINGfield sign nearby.  Mr. Burns stops them there, informing them that as a member of the Freemasons he, too, is interested in the jewel.  Lisa finds another puzzle, an anagram, and from it deducts that the jewel is actually her.

The group returns to the convent where a cocky Lisa reveals herself to everyone.  However, it turns out the crowd is praising someone else: Maggie!  Lisa solved the anagram incorrectly, and the correct solution reveals the jewel is actually Maggie.  A beam of light filters into the church and hits Maggie, sending rays of peace across Springfield.  It seems like a new age is about to begin.  However, a still-blind Marge barges in demanding her baby.  Though she's willing to let Maggie go if the first thing she sees is world peace, Maggie unwraps Marge's bandages, and Marge finally sees her baby, and decides to take her away anyway.  Marge feels a bit selfish afterwards, but Homer tells her he left another 'chosen one' at the convent: the ever devilish Bart.

Quick Review
In my review of the previous episode, I commented that the biggest problem with the show nowadays is that comedy is tossed aside at times in order to advance the plot or tell a story, elements that were once workable together in the past but I guess not so much now.  This fact was once again apparent in this episode, where the obvious parody of The Da Vinci Code took full precedence over the episode providing a steady stream of jokes and humor.  It didn't help that I never cared for that book turned movie so the references were lost on me, but even so the parody wasn't all that funny.

Final Score: 6.6

How the Test Was Won (S20, E11-431)

Skinner is likely thinking "this is still not worse than Vietnam... right?"

Plot Summary
Its the first day of school, and the kids have varying levels of excitement for it.  However, Principal Skinner informs the kids that they'll be taking federally-mandated aptitude tests in a couple of weeks, and the students' performance will affect funding.  As a result, everyone in school goes through a two week course of test preparation, including learning answer patterns.  The day of the test arrives, and both Skinner and Superintendent Chalmers are there to inform Bart that he got a perfect score on a practice test, and as a result gets to skip the real test and have a pizza party elsewhere.  Bart is thrilled, but soon finds out that it was a ruse; the bus with the other 'top scores' includes only Jimbo, Dolph, Kearney, Nelson and Ralph.  It turns out that Skinner and Chalmers are pushing aside the kids who would provide low test scores and the school can't afford any screw ups.  Chalmers agrees, and tricks Skinner onto the bus as well as it goes off.

In a side story, Homer is tasked by Marge to pay the insurance bill, which has come in handy for Homer's various accidents.  However, Homer forgets, and soon two weeks have passed (the same two weeks as earlier), and Homer finally realizes what's happened.  He sends the bill directly to the office, but reads a sign stating nobody will be back until 3 PM, and makes it a mission to avoid getting hurt.  Upon carefully returning home, Homer also realizes that nobody else can get hurt on his property or he'll be liable.  Worse yet, Marge is hosting a book club, whose patrons are walking a fine line of danger.  Homer is able to keep everyone there safe, but accidentally throws out a small knife that hits someone outside.  It's Mr. Burns, but luckily for Homer it was 3:01 when Burns was hit, so insurance will have it covered (probably).

Skinner, despite having been betrayed by Chalmers, still follows the mission of taking the boys to Capital City for the day.  However, Skinner takes the boys for a bathroom break, and upon returning is stunned to find the bus scrapped for parts.  The group now travels Capital City on foot, but Skinner loses track of Ralph, who somehow winds up on a trash barge.  Skinner tries to warn a nearby crane operator, but accidentally knocks him out instead, causing the container the guy was lifting to bust open and spill out pianos, right in the path of Ralph and the barge.  Skinner busts into action and jumps on top of the container, and runs around it, using the principle of conservation of angular motion to move the container away from the barge.  The boys are impressed that Skinner has actually applied knowledge to save Ralph, and the group rides the barge back to Springfield.

Throughout all of this, Chalmers has handled the test day rather poorly, giving everyone test anxiety (except Milhouse apparently).  Worse yet, Lisa has completely fallen apart, finding herself unable to answer a single question, and is ready to lament the failure that will be the rest of her life.  However, Skinner busts in just in time with the boys, and puts a halt to the test, realizing that real knowledge is acquired not in school, but on the streets.  Lisa is saved, I guess, and to celebrate the occasion, Skinner abolishes his ban on dancing.

Quick Review
This episode starts off slow and ends on a worthless note with the dancing.  The portions inbetween were alright, particularly Homer when he isn't insured, but it isn't enough to save the episode.

Final Score: 6.6

Any Given Sundance (S19, E18-418)

Movie stardom turns everyone into monsters, it seems.

Plot Summary
The Simpsons go to a football game between Springfield U and Springfield A&M not to watch the game, but to enjoy the tailgating food beforehand.  Lisa is initially bored with the whole thing, but with Marge's push, Lisa decides to simply film the things that occur during the tailgate, enjoying the supposed 'artistic' side of reality.  She turns in the video to her AV class, but gets only a 3/5.  Lisa goes to Principal Skinner to complain, but Skinner sees the video as something more than a 5/5, he believes Lisa is a natural filmmaker, and that he's more than willing to help Lisa create another film in the eventual hope that she'll win an Oscar and give it to him.  Lisa agrees to make another film, and Skinner gives her the perfect thing for the film to be about: her family.

As Lisa starts filming her family, Superintendent Chalmers visits Skinner, and the two agree that Lisa's film is of utmost importance, agreeing to submit Lisa's film to the Sundance Film Festival upon its completion.  The ultra-hipster film committee there loves Lisa's background, and accepts the movie on that alone without actually watching the movie.  The Simpson are invited to the festival where they get to see Lisa's movie.  However, the film actually paints the members in a rather negative light, yet the movie is huge hit with the audience.  The family gets mad at Lisa for how the movie portrayed them (especially after the film admits Lisa did the editing as well), and they grow tired of the crowd constantly hounding and mocking them.

Lisa regrets what she's done, but she is met by another filmmaker, the notable(?) Jim Jarmusch.  He takes Lisa to watch another film, also submitted by Skinner and Chalmers (who have since become big shots at Sundance).  This film, which chronicles Nelson's awful life, becomes an even bigger hit, and the present-minded Sundance audience have forgotten about the Simpsons so they can praise their new lords, the Muntz family.  Lisa thanks Jarmusch for his help, and the family forgives Lisa for her movie, admiring her quirky way of showing her love for them.

Quick Review
This was another mostly boring episode.  To be fair, Jim Jarmusch provided a much better guest spot than what I was expecting and his presence helped boost the episode.  However, the combination of Skinner and Chalmers, usually a rock-solid source of comedy, started to hinder the episode once they teamed up at Sundance, which hurt the episode.  The "production company" the two create in this episode, ChalmSkin, is referenced often in later episodes, and always very poorly.  In all, its another weak entry as the season falls to a disastrous close.

Final Score: 6.0