Coming to Homerica (S20, E21-441)

So is he part Norwegian or friends with one or did one save his life or what?

Plot Summary
Krusty learns his restaurant's burger is the unhealthiest in the nation, so he decides to roll out a vegetarian option where the burger is made from barley.  It's a raving success across town... until people start getting sick from the burgers.  Its learned that the barley in the burgers are tainted, so Kent Brockman investigates in the now heavily Norwegian Ogdenville, where a farmer admits a rat got caught in the grinders and that this happens all the time, unaware that the interview is being aired live.  Immediately, Ogdenville's barley industry comes to a crashing halt and the entire town goes under.  They leave to find new opportunities, and end up in Springfield where they're willing to do construction and other unsavory jobs for people at a nominal price.

At first, Homer and the other Springfield residents are happy the Ogdenvillians are doing the crap jobs for them, but the sheer quantity of them starts to become a problem.  Hospitals are overrun with Ogdenvillians who are injured from their work.  Moe makes a killing selling them "Aqua Vit", so concentrated in alcohol Homer can't handle a single glass.  Bart injures himself trying to one-up an Ogdenville kid in skateboarding, and Homer gets fired from still being drunk on the Aqua Vit.  With the problem still growing, the town has a meeting where they decide to ban the Ogdenville immigrants.

Of course, this is near impossible to do with just Chief Wiggum and Lou on watch.  A vigilante group is formed to help, but little gets accomplished with them.  Mayor Quimby gets the idea to build a wall to keep them out, but with nobody in Springfield really capable of building a wall, the mayor agrees to let the Ogdenvillians help build the wall designed to keep them out.  During the construction, several Springfieldians take a liking to the Ogdanvillians, so much so that when the wall is complete, everyone in Springfield just stands there, not really knowing what to do.  Fortunately for them, the Ogdanvillians built a door in the wall to allow them back in easily, and both groups become fast friends again, having a big Ogdanville-style party to celebrate their friendship.

Quick Review
This episode just got weirder and weirder as it went along.  An episode featuring a typically lame jab at illegal immigration with a decidedly strange twist to make those immigrants of Norwegian descent.  Its an odd combination, one that rarely worked in this subpar episode that once again eschews comedy for the lame attempt at storytelling.

Final Score: 6.2

Four Great Women and a Manicure (S20, E20-440)

"Curse the producers for giving me Jodie Foster's voice", she was probably thinking.

Plot Summary
Marge takes Lisa to get her first manicure.  Lisa, in her stubborn manner, tries to tell Marge that its more important that a woman be smart and powerful rather than look pretty, but Marge counters that a woman can be all three, telling her about Queen Elizabeth I as an example.

Queen Elizabeth I
The Queen (Selma) is taking in suitors to be her husband.  She turns down multiple suitors, including the King of Spain (Julio).  However, she takes a liking to Walter Raleigh (Homer), who offers the Queen tobacco as a gift.  However, Walter takes a liking to the Queen's Lady in Waiting (Marge), and Elizabeth quickly finds out, sending the two to be executed.  However, before that order can be carried out, she learns that Spain has gone to war against England.  She sends a ship to fight against it.  Unwittingly, Walter sets the ship on fire; as its crew goes overboard the blazing ship sets aflame the entire Spanish armada, winning the war for England.  Elizabeth allows Walter to marry the Lady in Waiting, admitted that she doesn't need a man as long as she has England.
Individual Score: -0.1

The Version of Snow White That Doesn't Belong to Disney
Lisa retorts about the dangers of obsessing over beauty, deciding to retell the story about Snow White.  To avoid legal troubles, the tale also features seven untrademarked dwarves: Crabby (Moe), Drunky (Barney), Hungry (Homer), Greedy (Burns), Lenny, Kearney, and Doc(tor Hibbert) who sing an original yet familiar sounding song as they operate a gem mine.  Nearby, a wicked queen (Lindsey Naegle, I guess) asks her HDTV in the wall who the prettiest woman is.  Angrily, she learns that person to be Snow White (Lisa).  She has someone (Willie) attempt to assassinate Snow White, but he can't go through with it and prompts Snow White to flee.  She hides at the seven Dwarves' house, and they let her stay.  One day, with the dwarves at work, the wicked queen uses her shapeshifting abilities to turn into an old hag, who ambushes Snow White and forces her to eat a poisoned apple.  Though the woodland animals take care of the queen, Snow White falls into a coma.

Then Lisa explains that Snow White eventually was cured by a woman doctor and lived a pedestrian life from then on.
Individual Score: +0.2

Lady MacBeth in the Real World Which is Actually Just an Alternate Ficticious Reality
Bothered by Homer, Marge decides to tell Lisa about a retelling of Lady MacBeth, but with Simpsons characters being themselves.  In this lengthy tale that feels like a rejected Treehouse of Horror segment, Marge is upset that the only role Homer could get in an upcoming Lady MacBeth play is that of a tree.  She is further upset that the lead role is filled by Sideshow Mel, and orders Homer to kill him so Homer can take his role.  Homer reluctantly does so and sure enough Homer now is given the lead role in the play.  The next day, though, reviews are in that proclaim Dr. Hibbert as the star of the show.  Angered, Marge has Homer kill him as well.  The next day, reviews of the previous nights play has Homer in dead last compared to five other actors, so Marge has Homer kill all of them as well.  Marge is only upset at this point because Homer killed those actors in costume, which she has to clean.  However, the ghosts of those killed haunt Marge, fully aware that her intent to kill is the true malice of the situation.  Marge is unable to handle it and dies from a heart attack.  Homer mourns Marge's death, but is relieved he can stop acting until Marge's ghost comes and forces Homer to keep going.  Its the final showing of the play, there are no other actors, and nobody is there to watch it, but Homer finally provides a stunning performance of his part.  Ghost Marge is proud of Homer, and gives him several more plays for him to try out, but Homer has enough and shoots himself so that his ghost self doesn't have to worry about acting anymore.
Individual Score: +0.2

Maggie Roark
As the show now breaks things up into four segments, there's still enough time for one more story, so Marge tells another one based around Maggie (and Ayn Rand's The Fountainhead for some reason).  In it, Maggie is in a preschool run by a guy who actively diminishes creative thinking.  Leaving the babies blocks to mess around with, the teacher is continuously forced to destroy Maggie's creations in an attempt to dull her creative sense.  It comes to a head when Maggie showcases another blocked beauty during a showcase to parents.  As a result, the teacher takes Maggie to trial, with the other babies as the jury.  After the teacher makes his case, Maggie defends herself.  Suddenly being guest voiced by Jodie Foster, Maggie tells everyone that like others in the past, she refuses to let her creative talent go to waste for anyone.  Marge then explains that Maggie grows up to be a successful architect and builds a day care which encourages creativity, but before Marge can finish the story she stops Maggie from messing up a wall with nail polish, ironically ignoring that Maggie had repainted a famous work of art in the process.
Individual Score: -0.1

Quick Review
This was a pretty bad episode.  Telling four stories really puts a cramp in each of them, not really letting any of them hit a stride.  Its made worse with the Lady MacBeth story line being nearly twice as long as the others ones yet that one still wasn't funny.  Really, none of these stories - some of which were peppered with Lisa's annoying self-service - were any good, and they all combine to make the worst episode of the season.

Final Score: 4.4

Waverly Hills 9-0-2-1-D'oh (S20, E19-439)

At least the snake in the radiator can't get him... probably.

Plot Summary
Marge learns about the terrible conditions at the elementary school and decides that Bart and Lisa just can't go there any longer.  At dinner, Milhouse (who is there for some reason) notes that his cousin goes to Waverly Hills Elementary, a much finer institution.  The family gets the idea to register an address in Waverly Hills so the kids can go to its school instead.  Homer finds an extremely cheap apartment in the worst part of town, but when they go to register an address they learn that someone will come by to check and see if they actually live at that address to prevent the kind of ploy the Simpsons are trying to use.  As such, Homer makes the sacrifice and starts living in his new crappy apartment.

At the new school, Lisa remains very unpopular, this time because she's unfamiliar with pop sensation Alaska Nebraska.  Worse yet, she gets a B+ in her school report as her teacher is actually checking Lisa's work now.  Lisa goes to Bart to whine, but Bart is in the middle of establishing his rep, cutting a deal with Chief Wiggum to give him a 'bad boy' motif in exchange for going to Ralph's birthday party.  As a result, Bart becomes the coolest boy in school.  Aware of Lisa's misfortunes, Bart goes to the trio of girls that had mocked Lisa earlier, and with his newfound influence allowing him to gain their attention, tells them that Lisa is Nebraska's closest friend, but tries to play ignorant to give Nebraska privacy.  The girls can't keep a secret, though, and soon the entire school knows that Lisa is Nebraska's friend.  This leads to some perks, like that same teacher now giving Lisa an A on her report because her daughter is a big fan of Alaska Nebraska, but the ploy soon blows up in Lisa's face: now they want Lisa to get them backstage passes to an upcoming Alaska Nebraska concert.  Lisa actually gets into Nebraska's dressing room hoping the star will help her, but she's denied by Nebraska and she's escorted out.  Lisa is forced to tell the truth to her 'friends' which results in them running after her in a fit of bloodlust.

Homer, in the meantime, is getting accustomed to his tiny apartment, befriending a couple of "bros".  Marge visits Homer and is fully taken into his new life as though the two of them are young adults renting their first apartment.  Homer eventually gives Marge a key to his apartment, but Marge quickly remodels it and starts getting upset when Homer does anything by himself.  The two start to bicker, but then the inspector comes in to see if their apartment really is inhabited by school children.  Homer and Marge do just enough in a panic to convince the inspector of that, and he takes his leave.  Just then, Lisa runs in saying she wants to go back to Springfield Elementary and resume her old life, and Bart doesn't mind going back either.  The entire family decides to move back to the suburbs, where Homer and Marge continue their young adult lifestyle in Bart's treehouse.

Quick Review
This was an alright episode at times, but for the most part there were a lot of lulls in the comedy - particularly during Lisa portions - that kept the episode from being all that great.

Final Score: 6.9

Father Knows Worst (S20, E18-438)

Helicopter parenting has never seen such lows.

Plot Summary
Homer and the kids go to a boardwalk while Marge replaces the water heater at home.  As Marge does so, she uncovers a hidden room behind the water heater previously covered in dust.  She learns that the room is a hidden sauna, likely built in by a previous owner, and decides to keep this secret to herself for now.  Meanwhile, Homer's blind lust for food on a stick has him accidentally eating a flaming stick, and things only get worse when Bart tricks Homer into drinking lighter fluid.  Homer's tongue is badly burned, and is forced into a cast for a few weeks.  Afterwards, its learned that Homer's old taste buds were burned out and new, ultra-sensitive ones have taken its place, leaving Homer unable to eat most foods without going insane from the increased sensitivity.  Lisa helps out by giving Homer some of blandest food around: elementary school cafeteria food.  Homer takes a liking to it, and decides to just start eating at the cafeteria itself, much to the annoyance of Bart.

Bart eventually shoos Homer away, and he sits with another boy, Noah, and his mother.  He learns that Noah's mother hovers over him like a helicopter, forcing him to get good grades and follow through on manners.  Homer compares the seemingly okay Noah to Bart, who isn't winning any scholarships any time soon, and realizes that Lisa isn't going anywhere either if she remains a social outcast.  In a panic, Homer tries to tell Marge about this, but Marge has been in the sauna for a bit too long and really couldn't care less about anything.  Homer decides to take matters into his own hands.  He rushes back to school to learn that there's a building model contest and Homer sends a disinterested Bart a poster of the Washington Monument to give him an idea on what to build.  Later, Homer gives Lisa a book on how to become popular with other shallow girls, though Lisa is initially hesitant to go through with it but is convinced by Homer to try it out.

At a model building store, Homer is informed that the Washington Monument is the wading pool of building models, so Homer instead buys the most difficult model to build: Westminster Abbey.  Upon returning home, Homer then hosts a cell phone decorating party for Lisa and her new friends, then goes to build Bart's model for him.  That project goes deep into the night.  Homer eventually falls asleep and has a strange dream where Oscar Wilde impractically tells him that by doing everything for Bart, he'll never learn anything on his own.  Homer is mostly confused, though, and unwittingly ruins the model in his sleep.

Still, Homer and Bart enter the contest with their ruined project.  They end up winning as, ironically, Superintendent Chalmers is convinced that Bart's model was the only one made without help from a parent.  Homer revels in his success, but Bart puts a stop to it by revealing the Homer made the model, that he also had the dream with Oscar Wilde, and that he's learned that he needs to do things himself or he'll never learn how to live on his own.  Homer relents, but believes that he did okay with Lisa, anyway.  Then he learns that Lisa hates her new life, that its hard work "being this shallow", and so he lets Lisa go back to her old popular self.  Somewhat defeated that his kids reached self-fulfilling conclusions through his efforts, Homer goes home where a concerned Marge decides to let him use her secret sauna to ease his troubles.

Quick Review
This was another decent episode.  Nothing really bad about it, nothing particularly outstanding about it, either.  I really don't have much more to say about this episode, its about as decently average as it can get.

Final Score: 7.0

The Good, the Sad and the Drugly (S20, E17-437)

Maybe Milhouse is getting revenge over what Bart did to him and his girlfriend.

Plot Summary
Bart and Milhouse pull another prank at school by removing every screw inside somehow.  However, Milhouse and only Milhouse is caught, but he refuses to rat out Bart, getting suspended for a week for his part in the prank.  Bart visits Milhouse at home quickly, and promises to visit every day.  Just then, Homer comes to pick Bart up so he can spend 'quality' time with Grampa.  As Bart just stands there at the retirement home, a beautiful girl comes in and catches Bart's eye.  The girl, Jenny, is a good Samaritan, so in order to impress her, Bart tries to show her he's a good boy as well.  This includes him saving ducks from bullies (who are trying to impress another girl), and telling Jenny that he spends a lot of time "working with this mentally challenged guy" aka Homer.

In the meantime, Lisa begins a social studies report on what Springfield will be like in 50 years.  She goes on the internet for help, when she comes across several doomsday scenarios that she takes to heart.  At school, a now deluded Lisa warns everyone of the future ahead, concerning all.  Later, Principal Skinner speaks with Lisa and suggests she visit a psychiatrist.  Lisa does so with her parents, and the psychiatrists suggests the depressed Lisa should start taking "happy pills".  Lisa agrees to do it, having lost all faith in everything anyway, and melts in forced joy as everything she sees turns into happy faces.

Bart invites Jenny over for dinner one night, and he believes everything is going his way.  Just then, a rather ominous storm starts up just as someone knocks on the door.  Bart answers it to find Milhouse standing there.  Milhouse is distraught that Bart has yet to visit his best friend, and learns that Bart is trying to hide his past so that he can be with Jenny.  Milhouse doesn't really care about that, though, and promises to make Bart's life difficult for lying to him.  Sure enough, Milhouse hounds Bart with his presence and his warnings of spilling the beans to Jenny.  Eventually, Bart can't take it anymore and reveals his past to Jenny.  Although Bart has made vast improvements to impress Jenny, she hates that their relationship was built on lies, and breaks up with him.

Lisa, meanwhile, has a close call when she comes close to kissing an electric fan Maggie is holding that she sees as another happy face.  Marge intervenes in time and tosses out Lisa's remaining pills, though the dog gets into that trash and gets enticed by Maggie's fan as well.  Later, a recovered Lisa talks with a depressed Bart, telling him that its pointless to wallow in despair, and to face his problems as they are.  Bart takes the suggestion to heart, and buys some flowers to apologize... to Milhouse for prioritizing a girl over their friendship.  Milhouse graciously accepts the apology and the two combine once more for another big prank at school.

Quick Review
Season 20 continues a trend of decent episodes with this worthwhile effort, an episode that definitely has its moments.  Lisa's side story was a bit odd, but there really wasn't anything wrong with it.  The main plot is the episode's strong point, especially when Milhouse is involved, and is the reason the episode scored as well as it did.

Final Score: 7.2

Eeny Teeny Maya Moe (S20, E16-436)

She doesn't want people to care about her height, yet she wears those heels.

Plot Summary
Marge forces Homer to spend more time with Maggie.  After a brief stroll, Homer takes Maggie to Moe's.  Moe is cleaning the bar for some odd reason, revealing that underneath the deep layers of dust there is a window showing a playground for babies.  Homer decides to leave Maggie there while he keeps an eye on her, or so is the theory, anyway.  Moe then gives an explanation for why he's cleaning the bar in the first place.  About a week ago, Moe was at a public library using its internet to chat to a local woman on the internet, Maya, who actually finds him charming.  The two eventually shared photos, and while Maya looked pretty hot, he was amazed to learn the woman found him cute as well, and the two agreed to meet at the bar tonight.  Soon enough, Moe meets Maya, but it turns out that Maya is several feet shorter than what he was expecting.

Maya tells Moe that in the picture she sent him, she was actually standing near a lego building but regardless the two hit it off and have lots of fun together, even if Moe stumbles to refrain from offensiveness.  Soon, though, Maya wants to meet some of Moe's friends.  Moe realizes that most of his bar mates would take advantage of Maya's height, except for maybe Homer, so he has Homer and Marge go with him and Maya on a double date, which is mostly successful.  Soon, Moe finally gathers the courage to ask Maya to marry him, at which point his tensions ease so much he casually lets loose all of the short jokes he had built up to that point, offending Maya who sternly asks him to leave.

While this is all happening, Maggie is having a tough time at the playground Homer is leaving her at as she is being bullied by other, stronger babies, though Homer usually picks her back up before anything serious happens.  Maggie starts freaking out at home as well, leaving Marge to suspect Homer is neglecting his duties.  She sets up a spy camera in Maggie's bow and gets a day's worth of footage, but she doesn't have time to watch the footage.  Eventually, she makes time and sees that Homer goes to the bar while Maggie is advanced upon by the bully babies.  However, the footage then shows Homer coming in to save Maggie, only to get beaten up by a bully baby instead, forcing Maggie to save Homer.  Homer then openly blesses Maggie as well as Marge for birthing her.  Marge praises an unwitting Homer for his heart, and the two make out, I guess.

Moe gets advice to undergo a crazy scheme to win back Maya's heart, going to Dr. Nick to make himself short.  Maya intervenes, telling Moe that if the first then he's reminded of when seeing her is her height, not her beauty, then the relationship just won't work out, and she breaks up with him.  Later, a rather joyous Homer gives the saddened Moe advice that, hey, he's back in his game, and if he had modest success with one woman, then chances are decent he'll have similar success with another woman.  Moe takes the advice to heart and moves on.

Quick Review
This was another decent episode.  In fact, this is the first episode in awhile where nothing within it really bothered me (other than the usual lack of joke quantity I've mentioned in previous reviews).  The Maggie subplot was pretty nice, and the main plot was your typical Moe episode, but it had several pretty good moments to make this one of the better episodes of the season.

Final Score: 7.4

Wedding for Disaster (S20, E15-435)

Bridezilla doesn't care much for King Wrong's nonsense.

Plot Summary
Reverend Lovejoy hypes everyone up for the arrival of the Holy Parson and, sure enough, the town fawns over the guy and his easy going demeanor.  The Parson and Lovejoy get a moment to themselves, where the Parson reveals that due to a technical error, there was a period of three months where Lovejoy was not an official Reverend, and therefore anything he did during that period of time never counted.  Lovejoy goes around town telling those affected about the error, including Homer and Marge, who just so happened to have their second wedding during that same time frame.  As such, Homer and Marge are still divorced.

The two go to town hall to pay for a marriage license, but its sort of depressing with no romantic over tones around.  Homer opts not to get a license at that time, and decides instead to throw Marge a big wedding instead to really make it count.  Soon, though, Marge completely takes over the wedding planning, getting incredibly upset if even the slightest detail is askew.  Homer tries to confront Marge over her control, calling her a "Bridezilla", but Marge doesn't back down.  The day of the wedding arrives, and Homer is depressed over how Marge has handled everything.  A short time later, Marge gets the wedding going, but is delayed when Homer doesn't show up.  She goes to find out what's taking Homer so long, only to learn in shock that Homer has disappeared, having apparently ditched the wedding.

As Marge starts blaming herself over what's happened, Bart and Lisa are skeptical over Homer's departure and search his room for clues.  Bart finds a keychain with the initials "S.B.", and the two quickly assume Sideshow Bob is responsible.  Meanwhile, Homer finds himself chained to a pipe in some sort of torture room, and is given a lollipop with key to the chain within, however both the lollipop and the key are made of hot sauce.  Bart and Lisa locate Bob, who isn't in jail, but is spending time with Krusty, who vouches that Bob was with him during the time in question.  Bob is gratified he was thought of first from the initials S.B., but Bob quickly tells the kids those initials could belong to a number of people, including... Selma Bouvier!  It turns out that in fact it was Selma - and Patty - who kidnapped and are subsequently torturing Homer.  Ready to give up, Homer starts reading the vows he had prepared for the wedding, admitting he misses Marge, the kids, and even his sisters-not-currently-in-law.  The vows get to Patty and Selma, and they decide to let him go.  They dispose of the evidence as quickly as they can, but Bart and Lisa overhear them talk about the kidnapping, and have them pegged.

Homer and Marge get their license at town hall, saddened over recent events.  However, upon exiting the building, they're met with an extravagant wedding reception, secretly paid for by Patty and Selma so Bart and Lisa wouldn't out their scheme to Marge.  Marge couldn't be happier, and the two finally get to enjoy their wedding.

Quick Review
This was an alright episode.  The Sideshow Bob cameo was a bit out of place but appreciated none the less, and the twists the episode provided in the latter portion came along with a decent amount of humor.  Admittedly, it was a slow start with the Parson bit and the Bridezilla portion, but it picked up and became a respectable episode.

Final Score: 7.1

In the Name of the Grandfather (S20, E14-434)

Nothing like an army veteran dancing on graves to boost your spirits.

Plot Summary
Marge brings the family to a Home & Garden show, much to the disappointment of everyone else.  However, that disdain turns to joy when Homer finds a booth advertising a home spa system, and everyone in the family agrees to get one.  Upon setting it up, the family (and for a time Ned Flanders) melts away in the warm, soothing bubbles provided by the hot tub.  For a moment, the family tries to remember that there was something urgent to attend to, but are too enveloped in pleasure to care.  As it turns out, they're missing Senior-Family day at the retirement home, and Grampa is left alone for yet another social affair.  Angered, the old man goes to the Simpsons home and unplugs and eventually demolishes the hot tub.  The family does feel bad for missing Grampa's event, though, and knowing that Grampa may not be around for much longer, agrees to do one thing on his list of stuff to do before he dies.  Homer decides on an initially simple one: having one more beer at O'Flanagan's Bar.  Then he learns the place is actually in Ireland, but the family goes anyway.

Upon reaching Ireland, Grampa is more than ready to embrace Ireland's rich history.  Unfortunately for him, even Ireland has modernized, and is full of the same businesses and people one could find in, say, Seattle.  Still, O'Flanagan's bar is still around, but Grampa learns its also empty.  He finds an elder O'Flanagan in the back, who reveals that since all of his drunken patrons have since become employed, his business has tanked so bad he can't even remember how to pronounce 'pint' and 'pub'.  Regardless, Grampa and Homer buy a beer.  Marge takes the kids sightseeing in the meantime.  Grampa and Homer actually drink quite a bit, and wake up some time later hungover.  They learn that in their drunken state, they purchased the bar from O'Flanagan, who merrily leaves his dead pub to the pair of suckers.

The two men have as much trouble attracting customers as the previous owner, but Homer recalls there was someone who was able to make money from a old, customer-less bar: Moe!  Moe gets shipped in directly and upon arriving gives the two an important tip: provide a service that no other bar or pub can do, even if its not legal.  Quickly, they realize that smoking in bars is no longer allowed in Ireland, and they decide to run a smoking bar.  As Moe takes his leave, the bar quickly fills up with patrons who love to smoke, however the police arrive in due time and arrest the two for what they're doing.  Somewhat fortunately for them, the only punishment they receive is deportation and a small fine, as the judge admits that all of Ireland's dimwits of old have since gone to America and became cops somehow.  Just then, Chief Wiggum comes in...

Quick Review
So the Simpsons go on another adventure in a different country.  Unlike past episodes where they insult everything within, like in Australia or England or Brazil, this episode treats Ireland rather well.  In fact, it treats Ireland much better than it does the people watching the episode.  This was not a funny episode at all.  The random Q-bert reference was pretty bad, and the continued use of 'progressive' leprechauns was stupid, too.  The main plot was okay, as okay as it could be, but it wasn't nearly enough to salvage this mess.

Final Score: 4.6

Gone Maggie Gone (S20, E13-433)

Yeah, uh huh, sure, whatever.

Plot Summary
Springfield is a recipient of the ever-rare solar eclipse, and the Simpson family builds makeshift boxes to see the event safely.  Homer's is ruined, though, so Marge gives him hers.  The eclipse occurs, and the family is greatly enjoying this occasion.  Marge can't deal with being left out, and decides to see the eclipse dead on, just as sunlight begins to peek back out.  Marge's eyes suffer tremendous damage as a result, and so Marge is blinded, being forced to wear bandages over her eye for two weeks and must avoid all stress at any cost.

To make matters difficult, rats decide to infest the Simpson kitchen right then.  Homer goes to buy some poison, bringing Maggie and the dog along for no apparent reason.  Homer later laments his decision to bring the two as both cause chaos for him within the car on the way back.  Homer drives off a bridge and lands on a spot near a river he needs to cross.  There's a boat nearby, however it can't support him, Maggie, the dog and the rat poison all at once.  Homer comes up with a solution to his puzzle, and decides to row Maggie first to the other side, leaving her at a nearby convent so he can continue his puzzle solving.  However, the convent quickly takes Maggie in while Homer is rowing back.  Homer tries to get the nuns there to give her back, but they refuse.

Back home, Homer tells the kids what happened, and agree not to stress out Marge with this information.  Lisa decides that someone has to disguise themselves as a nun and infiltrate the convent to find Maggie.  Lisa agrees to be that person.  She's admitted in as a nun, but she can't seem to find Maggie anywhere.  A rather withered nun tells Lisa that the mystery of Maggie's location is linked to the mystery of a jewel, and Lisa decides the undergo the challenge of determining where this mystical jewel is located so that she can find Maggie.

As Homer and Bart try to keep the blinded Marge unaware of both Maggie's and Lisa's unavailability, Lisa goes across town as she continues to figure out the puzzles she's come across, the latest one asking her to find the biggest 'ring' in Springfield.  Lisa is interrupted by the comic book guy and Principal Skinner, both of whom have also taken an interest in the jewel.  The comic book guy expands on the history of the jewel, which includes nuns going overseas to find it, and even a staged revolutionary war by Freemasons to find the jewel, which will bring peace to Springfield on the first full moon after a solar eclipse.  As that happens to be the current night, Lisa realizes that the biggest ring in Springfield is the giant SpRINGfield sign nearby.  Mr. Burns stops them there, informing them that as a member of the Freemasons he, too, is interested in the jewel.  Lisa finds another puzzle, an anagram, and from it deducts that the jewel is actually her.

The group returns to the convent where a cocky Lisa reveals herself to everyone.  However, it turns out the crowd is praising someone else: Maggie!  Lisa solved the anagram incorrectly, and the correct solution reveals the jewel is actually Maggie.  A beam of light filters into the church and hits Maggie, sending rays of peace across Springfield.  It seems like a new age is about to begin.  However, a still-blind Marge barges in demanding her baby.  Though she's willing to let Maggie go if the first thing she sees is world peace, Maggie unwraps Marge's bandages, and Marge finally sees her baby, and decides to take her away anyway.  Marge feels a bit selfish afterwards, but Homer tells her he left another 'chosen one' at the convent: the ever devilish Bart.

Quick Review
In my review of the previous episode, I commented that the biggest problem with the show nowadays is that comedy is tossed aside at times in order to advance the plot or tell a story, elements that were once workable together in the past but I guess not so much now.  This fact was once again apparent in this episode, where the obvious parody of The Da Vinci Code took full precedence over the episode providing a steady stream of jokes and humor.  It didn't help that I never cared for that book turned movie so the references were lost on me, but even so the parody wasn't all that funny.

Final Score: 6.6

No Loan Again, Naturally (S20, E12-432)

There needs to be more touching moments like this, too.

Plot Summary
Homer hosts his annual Mardi Gras in his backyard which is as good as ever.  Marge has Homer invite Flanders over, but he's a wet blanket and is mostly ignored.  The next day, in the aftermath, Lenny asks Homer how he can afford such extravagance each year.  Homer's secret?  Home equity loans!  Who knew it'd be so simple?  Oh, but wait its not.  Sure enough, Homer and Marge go to the bank to have their mortgage readjusted following Homer's latest loan, and learn that their new monthly payment has become way too high from them to pay.  As a consequence, their home is put up to auction.  Both Homer and Marge have a difficult time dealing with these turn of events, and its not made any better during the auction itself when it seems like Mr. Burns is going to buy it from $100,000 as a store house for his cuff links.  Just then, though, Ned Flanders decides to throw in a bid of his own: $101,000.  Mr. Burns doesn't care enough to continue, and Ned wins the house, offering it back to the Simpsons just so long as they pay him monthly to cover the cost.  The family generously thanks Ned, who is essentially their new landlord.

Things start off fine at first, the Simpsons even take a picture with the Flanders family to celebrate the occasion.  However, Ned learns that the house is rather dilapidated, and Marge has him repair just about everything.  Late at night, the house has a major gas leak, but Ned is so worn out from his previous work that he tells them he'll get to it the next morning.  This upsets Homer, who tells Ned off right there (and even more so when Ned reminds them they're late with their payment).  Homer goes to the bar where he gets advice from Moe to take his rage to the media.  Kent Brockman portrays the Simpsons, well, Homer, as a victim and Ned as the worst person of all time.  Ned finally has enough, and tells Homer straight up that at the end of the month, he wants the family out of the house.

Attempting to stay in the house for awhile longer, Homer finds out that the family can't be evicted if someone over the age of 65 also lives there.  Finally finding his father useful, Homer brings the old man home post-haste as the family begins to squat.  Feeling a bit confident about the situation, though, the family decides to go on a walk, though Grampa has to stay in the house to prevent Ned from evicting anyone.  However, upon returning, it turns out Ned convinced Grampa to stay at his house instead, as Ned treats Grampa adequately for a change, and is able to remove most of their things in that short time the family was gone.

The Simpsons are now officially homeless, with Bart and Lisa being forced to wear shirts promoting either one of the Hulk movies.  Ned tries to rent the house to a seemingly nice couple, but stumbles upon the picture he took with the Simpsons, and sentiment gets the better of him.  He denies the couple the house so he can return it to the Simpsons, the declaration of which is enough for all the other neighbors to move out.

Quick Review
This episode is frustrating.  I say its frustrating not because it was particularly bad, or cringe worthy, or nothing like that.  Rather, this episode for the first time in awhile really reminded me of what made the golden age of the show so great.  There were quite a few moments in this episode that were quite superb, such as Homer defaming Ned on TV, Homer pretending to be Jesus to get Ned to reconsider despite having no actual biblical knowledge, and Grampa being okay with Homer using him for his own devices.  These were great moments.

I keep saying this or implying it anyway, and its all the more apparent with this episode, but it still rings true: the biggest problem with the show nowadays is that it lacks the absolute quantity - not quality, quantity - of jokes and humor that filled every top-notch episode in the past.  From that lack of quantity, the episode's score just can't go up as high as it did back in its peak.  There are just too many comedic lows when there isn't much of an attempt at comedy.  The multiple times the Simpsons were going to be or were homeless provided little laughs as it focused more on the drama of the moment than the comedy of the moment.  Its that shift in storytelling which keeps the show from reaching the heights of what it once was.

Halfway through this season, this is the best episode of it thus far and I hope that what I've seen in this episode begins an upward trend for the episodes to come.  I enjoyed some of what I've seen here, but I need to see more of it much more frequently before my confidence in this show can even be considered to return.

Final Score: 7.7

How the Test Was Won (S20, E11-431)

Skinner is likely thinking "this is still not worse than Vietnam... right?"

Plot Summary
Its the first day of school, and the kids have varying levels of excitement for it.  However, Principal Skinner informs the kids that they'll be taking federally-mandated aptitude tests in a couple of weeks, and the students' performance will affect funding.  As a result, everyone in school goes through a two week course of test preparation, including learning answer patterns.  The day of the test arrives, and both Skinner and Superintendent Chalmers are there to inform Bart that he got a perfect score on a practice test, and as a result gets to skip the real test and have a pizza party elsewhere.  Bart is thrilled, but soon finds out that it was a ruse; the bus with the other 'top scores' includes only Jimbo, Dolph, Kearney, Nelson and Ralph.  It turns out that Skinner and Chalmers are pushing aside the kids who would provide low test scores and the school can't afford any screw ups.  Chalmers agrees, and tricks Skinner onto the bus as well as it goes off.

In a side story, Homer is tasked by Marge to pay the insurance bill, which has come in handy for Homer's various accidents.  However, Homer forgets, and soon two weeks have passed (the same two weeks as earlier), and Homer finally realizes what's happened.  He sends the bill directly to the office, but reads a sign stating nobody will be back until 3 PM, and makes it a mission to avoid getting hurt.  Upon carefully returning home, Homer also realizes that nobody else can get hurt on his property or he'll be liable.  Worse yet, Marge is hosting a book club, whose patrons are walking a fine line of danger.  Homer is able to keep everyone there safe, but accidentally throws out a small knife that hits someone outside.  It's Mr. Burns, but luckily for Homer it was 3:01 when Burns was hit, so insurance will have it covered (probably).

Skinner, despite having been betrayed by Chalmers, still follows the mission of taking the boys to Capital City for the day.  However, Skinner takes the boys for a bathroom break, and upon returning is stunned to find the bus scrapped for parts.  The group now travels Capital City on foot, but Skinner loses track of Ralph, who somehow winds up on a trash barge.  Skinner tries to warn a nearby crane operator, but accidentally knocks him out instead, causing the container the guy was lifting to bust open and spill out pianos, right in the path of Ralph and the barge.  Skinner busts into action and jumps on top of the container, and runs around it, using the principle of conservation of angular motion to move the container away from the barge.  The boys are impressed that Skinner has actually applied knowledge to save Ralph, and the group rides the barge back to Springfield.

Throughout all of this, Chalmers has handled the test day rather poorly, giving everyone test anxiety (except Milhouse apparently).  Worse yet, Lisa has completely fallen apart, finding herself unable to answer a single question, and is ready to lament the failure that will be the rest of her life.  However, Skinner busts in just in time with the boys, and puts a halt to the test, realizing that real knowledge is acquired not in school, but on the streets.  Lisa is saved, I guess, and to celebrate the occasion, Skinner abolishes his ban on dancing.

Quick Review
This episode starts off slow and ends on a worthless note with the dancing.  The portions inbetween were alright, particularly Homer when he isn't insured, but it isn't enough to save the episode.

Final Score: 6.6

Take My Life, Please (S20, E10-430)

Only HD could capture the alternate bastardization of The Way We Was.

Plot Summary
The Simpsons visit the Springfield Wall of Fame, where a new plaque is about to be added to it: the plaque of one Vance Connor.  Homer is particularly unhappy with this, as it turns out Homer had run against Vance for Senior Class President back in high school, but apparently lost after Homer badly botched a debate against Vance.  Homer hopes that Vance has some secret agony, but he doesn't, which depresses Homer more.  Even worse, at the bar Lenny and Carl reveal that in high school, they were secretly tasked by Principal Dondelinger to dispose of the ballot box containing the results of that election.  Later that night, Homer grabs Lenny and the two dig up the box where Lenny had hidden it.  Homer takes it home and Lisa counts up the results, and finds out that Homer, in fact, won that election.

Angered, Homer locates the now retired Dondelinger demanding answers for that.  Dondelinger admits that he did dispose of the box but, despite his disdain for Homer, actually did it spare Homer's feelings.  At that time, Dondelinger had overheard some jocks planning to vote Homer in just so they can laugh at how big of a joke he is, and decides to ensure Vance's victory to spare Homer ridicule.  Homer's feelings towards the incident are now very mixed, but he's still left wondering what would've happened had Dondelinger let the matter be.

The family goes to Luigi's for dinner, where Homer openly continues his depression.  Luigi overhears, and tells the family that he employs a guy who stirs a sauce in such a way that staring into the cause can create illusions of "what if" scenarios.  Homer decides to take advantage and looks into the sauce.  In this new reality, Homer does win the election, but before any jocks can mock him, Lenny and Carl stand up for Homer and soon Homer becomes very popular.  Soon, Homer becomes so popular he can take any girl he wants to the prom, and he chooses the girl he's been eyeing for some time: a cheerleader named Debbie Pinson.  Lisa tries to exclaim that Homer's life would've been worse because he didn't end up with Marge, but the vision continues to the prom, where Homer finally sees Marge, and dumps Debbie right away to talk to Marge who, in this reality, is quite smitten with the Senior Class President.  The two walk to Marge's house afterward and become a couple.  Homer walks home from there where he's met by Mr. Burns, who is impressed by Homer's school standing and offers him a job at the plant, albeit in a slightly better sector.  Now, Lisa wants to make the claim that Homer's life would've been the same anyway.  However, now the vision moves to that reality's present.  A much livelier Abe Simpson lives in the standard Simpson home, but Homer himself lives in a giant mansion next door.  As regular Homer had predicted, Marge is in fact hotter in this alternate reality, and because this Homer had remembered to use protection, the two never had any kids.  Marge half-assedly tries to convince Homer (and herself) that the kids are what make their current reality the better of the two, but Homer isn't buying it, and laments the trainwreck that has become of his life.

Homer is now more depressed than ever, but Marge and the kids take him back to the Wall of Fame where Homer now has a plaque on it for being a class president-elect (unknown to Homer, someone, guessing Bart, removed Seymour Skinner's plaque to make room for Homer's).  Homer begins to cheer up, especially after some guy and his kid look up to newly notable Homer, and Homer feels like he's going to be okay, even though the family plan on going to a Korean barbecue which sells meat that can predict a time of death.

Quick Review
There might of been a point where the series moving to HD would've been hailed as a triumphant moment.  Unfortunately, the series had begun to falter even before HD had even taken off as anything.  With the long awaited switch to HD comes a new opening sequence.  The new sequence shoves in many characters and their now-caricatured manners, Homer now being hit by Marge's car instead of him successfully evading it because "lol homer get hurt, be funny", and them now owning a flat screen TV instead of their old one that now sometimes falls off the wall at the end of the sequence.  Personally, it seems pretty try hard to me, and a lot of people dislike the lack of fluid animation this sequence has compared to the old one, but whatever.  Its just an opening sequence.

The episode itself is nothing special.  The plot was pretty decent, if not a bit odd.  "Hey, Homer finds out that he got cheated in high school, but then finds out what life would've been like if hadn't, and its actually better, so now he has to just deal with it.  Except he can't so his family sets up a deception so Homer can stop feeling so bad about himself".  That's pretty much what the episode was, and yes the continued lack of joke quantity (and quality) is a continued problem that also plagues this episode.

Final Score: 6.3

Lisa the Drama Queen (S20, E09-429)

Imagination... or delusion?  You decide.

Plot Summary
Homer drops Bart and Lisa off at the recreation center.  There, Lisa finds a new friend: Juliet, whose parents have just moved to Springfield.  Lisa enjoys Juliet's intellect and taste in music, and the two become very good friends and, after having Juliet stay over for a night, the two become best friends.  That night, the two begin work on a fantasy land where everyone is equal except the two of them, who are its queens, calling it Equalia.

Juliet's family invites the Simpsons over for dinner, where Juliet openly disagrees with her father over music and runs off.  Lisa catches up to Juliet, who has deluded herself into fully imagining Equalia, and Lisa imagines it right with her.  The two become completely enveloped in Equalia and its adventures, chronicling them in a notebook.  However, Lisa's focus on Equalia has left her struggling in school, so Marge is left with no other option but to have Lisa stop seeing Juliet.  At school, however, Lisa is met by Juliet, who tells Lisa she's running away and wants Lisa to join her.  Lisa decides to forgo her important Model U.N. duties and the two run off together.

Juliet takes Lisa to an abandoned clam restaurant with a medieval theme out in the forest, and the two decide to stake out there.  Marge is informed by Model U.N. participant Martin that Lisa is absent, and Marge quickly realizes what's happened, and takes the family to where Marge believes two girls fantasizing about medieval castles would go.  Unfortunately, Marge guesses wrong as they head to the mini-golf course.  Meanwhile, Lisa and Juliet's new adventures are interrupted by Jimbo, Dolph and Kearney, who had made the restaurant their base.  They capture the girls, and leave Kearney to guard them as the other two go elsewhere for a time.  The two girls try to forget their troubles by continuing their Equalia adventures, but inadvertently intrigue Kearney as well.  Some time later, Kearney is as enveloped in Equalia as they are.  Jimbo and Dolph return, and decide to burn the notebook Lisa and Juliet had been working on.  Kearney, however, refuses to let his new favorite fantasy land burn away and attacks the other two, allowing Lisa and Juliet to escape with the book.  Lisa realizes that its not good to always stay in a fantasy land, and that being grounded in real life isn't a bad thing either.  Juliet disagrees, believing the real world to be devoid of imagination, and takes her leave, effectively ending their friendship.  Some time later, Lisa receives word that the Chronicles of Equalia have been rejected as a book, but Homer is... somewhat... inspired to write a fantasy novel of his own.  Then for some reason Bart lets Fallout Boy perform during the credits.

Quick Review
This episode has several bright spots, most notably during the Simpsons' dinner at Juliet's house.  However, the multiple scenes featuring Lisa and Juliet together were just... not funny.  There were several instances in those scenes where it didn't seem like humor was even attempted, and from that, this episode's score suffers harshly because it seemed like this episode would've been fine had it kept up with the comedy throughout.

As an aside, this is the first episode to break up into four segments instead of three, as the episode now begins immediately after the opening sequence.  Much more notably, this is the final episode to air in standard definition as the new production of episodes begins the following episode.  This is also the final episode to use the opening sequence that had been in place since Season 2.  It was used during the best of times and, for now, the worst of times.  It is definitely the end of an era.

Final Score: 6.7

The Burns and the Bees (S20, E08-428)

Here is an image that describes the title of the episode in adequate fashion.

Plot Summary
At a billionaires camp, Mr. Burns has a grand ol' time with his fellow billionaires.  During a poker game, he's able to win a professional basketball team from a rich Texan, the "Austin Celtics".  A short time later, Burns watches his team play the Dallas Mavericks and is flabbergasted over the flamboyant antics of Dallas' owner, Mark Cuban.  Burns decides to try some publicity acts of his own in his team's first home game.  Having renamed the team the Springfield Excitement, Burns is unable to drum up any excitement with his dated, annoying antics.  As people leave in drones, Burns comes up with an idea to get them back: a state-of-the-art arena.

Meanwhile, Lisa learns that the bee population is dying around the world.  She gets help from Professor Frink who tells Lisa that bees have contracted a deadly disease, and that they need to start up an unaffected colony.  Lisa attracts an unaffected queen, and is able to get it to sting her, attracting other bees and basically giving Lisa a beard of bees.  Given this is the only way the bees can survive for now, Lisa takes the bees with her back home.  Marge, unsettled by this, eventually finds a place for Lisa to keep the bees: an abandoned greenhouse.  Lisa is happy that her bees have done so well, however suddenly the greenhouse is hit with a wrecking ball; it turns out that Mr. Burns has chosen this site for his new arena.  After a failed attempt to sway the public at the town meeting, Lisa is forced to take her bees away before the construction kills them.

At Moe's, Lisa laments that her bees are unlikely to survive much longer in the jar she has them in.  As she leaves, Moe lets Homer know that he has with him a colony of Africanized bees and that if they mixed with Lisa's bees, the resulting group of bees would likely survive in any environment.  Homer agrees, and grabs Lisa's queen bee to mate with Moe's bees.  Six weeks later, Burns' arena is complete, and at the same time nearby Homer goes to show Lisa the new bees.  However, these are some angry bees, and Homer accidentally lets them fly free.  They head for the arena, shaped oddly like a bee colony, and swarm Burns' arena with nobody able to stop them.  Overnight, it becomes a bee sanctuary, and Burns is forced to abandon it much to Lisa's joy.  The next year, at the billionaire's camp, Burns tells this story, as well as the fact that he had to write off over $800 million because of it.  The other billionaires realize that write off makes his worth less than a billion, and promptly toss him over to the dirty ol' millionaires camp.

Quick Review
This episode has its moments - not enough of them - but moments, anyway.  Mark Cuban provided an okay guest spot, I suppose, nothing all that good, but it wasn't throwaway either.  The whole plot with the bees was decent, better than Burns' plot, but as a whole the episode wasn't all that great.

As an aside, this episode uses a modified version of its opening that gives it a Christmas theme.  This is the second episode to use this modified opening; Season 18's Kill Gil, Volumes I & II also used this opening.  Unlike that episode, this episode featured no Christmas theme outside of the opening.  Its also odd timing; the following episode will be the last episode to use the show's classic opening before it debuts its new HD opening.

Final Score: 6.9

Mypods and Boomsticks (S20, E07-427)

Oh look its characters with the same voice actor meeting each other.  Again.

Plot Summary
The Simpsons go to the mall the day after Christmas to return Bart's calenders.  There, Lisa spots that there is a new "Mapple" store, and the family checks it out.  Lisa wants to get a "Mypod" badly, but doesn't have nearly enough money to get one.  Fortunately for her, Krusty walks in displeased with his Mypod and just gives it to Lisa.  Meanwhile, a message from Steve "Mobs" pops up on a big screen, which Bart hijacks for amusement.  The rabid employees there learn of what Bart did and attempt to give him hell.  Bart is able to run away, ending up far away from the mall.  He smells some kind of meat being cooked, and goes to investigate.  He finds a young boy cooking lamb and Bart decides to befriend him.  The boy, Bashir, and his parents are from Jordan.  Bart tries to get Bashir accustomed to school, but when he learns Bashir is Muslim, Bart has to make sure Bashir doesn't get beat up just for being different, successfully warding off bullies to protect his new friend.

Later, Homer meets Bashir and takes a liking to him.  However, at the bar, Homer's friends convince him that because Bashir is Muslim, that automatically means bad news.  Following a stream of advice in his head from Lenny, Homer invites Bashir's family over for dinner in an attempt to out them as terrorists.  Bashir's family doesn't like Homer's attitude and demeanor, and leave the dinner.  Marge chides Homer for his intolerance, and forces Homer to go to their house and apologize.  Homer goes to the house but before he knocks, he notices something going on in the garage, and spies Bashir's father preparing dynamite.  Homer rushes home to tell Marge, but she's less than interested and Homer is content on telling her about it tomorrow.  Homer then has a dream where the similarly voiced Genie from Aladdin appears to turn everything Muslim.  Homer can't deal with it, and decides he has to stop the supposed terrorist plot.

Homer spies Bashir's father leave, overhearing only that he's going to suicide bomb a building, not that he's actually going to blow up a building in a safe, approved manner.  Homer infiltrates the house by having Bashir's mother invite him in for a talk, then going off on his own to find a laptop that features an image of the Springfield mall next to a TNT detonator.  Homer panics, and rushes over to the mall to warn everyone (save his sisters in law) of an unspecified danger.  Just then, he sees Bashir and his father, along with Bart whose hands are on a detonator.  Bashir's father has set up dynamite to blow up the old mall across the street, which is abandoned.  Regardless, Homer rushes into the building, removes all the dynamite, and tosses it into a nearby river.  The dynamite drags the detonator, forcing it to trigger just as the dynamite reaches a bridge, blowing it up.  Some time later, Homer hosts Bashir's family again in yet another "sorry for being intolerant" barbecue.  Lisa is missing, though, as it turns out she downloaded so many songs on her Mypod she ended up with a $1200 bill, and has gone to Steve Mobs himself for forgiveness, but has to pay the bill off by putting on a costume and handing out pamphlets on a street corner.

Quick Review
This episode was better than I thought it'd be.  Given this is zombie Simpsons, you would think an episode that focuses on Muslim culture AND Apple culture would be a recipe for disaster.  True, Lisa's "Mapple" adventures dragged the episode down some, as pretty much that entire bit wasn't funny.  However, Homer's newest intolerance spree provided a level of comedy I wasn't expecting, and salvages the episode.  Even with the lame Apple parodies I didn't find a whole lot wrong with the episode save for the continued lessened quantity of jokes.

Note: for those a bit confused with the caption, Dan Castellaneta voiced the Genie in pretty much everything that wasn't the original Aladdin movie.  Robin Williams voiced Genie in that movie but Dan took over from there.

Final Score: 7.1

Homer and Lisa Exchange Cross Words (S20, E06-426)

Letting Gil Gunderson beat her.  Man, Lisa really did choke.

Plot Summary
Bart and Lisa attempt to sell lemonade.  Homer tries to start a tab, but when Bart wisely refuses, Homer goes to Moe's instead.  There, Edna Krabappel is trying to break up with Principal Skinner (even though, you know, she already did).  For some reason, she can't do it this time, and offers a beer to whoever else will do it for her.  Homer decides to tell Skinner, but the way he does it leaves Skinner happier than before he was given the news.  Its decided that Homer is pretty good at breaking people up and consoling them, and he takes it up as a profession.  Eventually, Marge chides Homer for what he's doing, prompting him as to what would've happened if someone like him was around during one of his various spats with Marge.  That, with an ensuing nightmare, convinces Homer to quit.

Meanwhile, a lawyer comes and stops Bart and Lisa from selling lemonade until they get a license to do so.  They actually bother going to a license bureau to get one, but the line is stalled as the vendor is focused on a crossword puzzle he's stuck.  Lisa has enough, and walks up and solves the puzzle for the guy in record time, and is hailed as a hero.  Soon, Lisa becomes overly obsessed with crossword puzzles, seeing everyday words convert into crosswords and only bothering to do the puzzles from the New York Times.  Superintendent Chalmers picks up on this, and invites Lisa to a crossword tournament.  Homer takes her there, and hangs out at a nearby bar where he learns that various other parents are betting on the crossword matches.  Homer uses the money he earned breaking people up to bet on Lisa, and it pays off for him as Lisa goes all the way to the championship match.  However, Lisa confides in Homer that in these situations, she always finds a way to choke.  Homer takes these words seriously, and decides to bet his winnings against Lisa, much to the disgust of everyone in the bar.  In the championship match, Lisa is up against ol' Gil Gunderson, who uses an elaborate ruse to completely dominate and defeat Lisa for the title.  Lisa can't believe what just happened, but Homer is a richer man for it.

Lisa quickly realizes something is off when she notices Homer has upgraded a lot of his stuff.  Homer decides to tell Lisa what he did.  Lisa simply walks away, refusing to talk to Homer aside from saying she isn't mad (though it's clear she is).  Eventually, Lisa opens up on Homer, telling him she no longer considers him her father, and that she's now taken up Marge's maiden name as Lisa Bouvier.  Devastated, Homer decides to take the advice of the childless drunks at the bar and do something to offset his error.  A short time later, Marge convinces Lisa to do another puzzle to cool off.  Afterword, Lisa realizes the puzzle reveals an odd message: "dumb dad sorry for his bet".  Lisa wants to believe its just a coincidence, but she asks Homer about it anyway.  He reveals that he got in contact with both the editor and puzzle constructor of the New York Times to create a puzzle just for her.  She also missed a second message within the clues themselves which reveal Homer's apparently earnest apology.  Lisa forgives Homer, and the two share a bonding moment in front of the weird newspaper guys.

Quick Review
Well, I will say that there really wasn't anything bad about the episode.  I will also say that there really wasn't anything all that funny about it, either.  Homer's breakup business seemed like it had the most potential, but all the references to past couples really left it without much room for humor, and the subsequent focus on Lisa didn't help it much after that.  Its a pretty forgettable episode.

Final Score: 6.4

Dangerous Curves (S20, E05-425)

Become a couple after they both failed to break up another couple, how about that.

Plot Summary
The family is on a 4th of July weekend road trip, and they pick up a pair of hitchhikers, who are in love.  The scene then flashes back to 20 years ago, when a young Homer and Marge are riding their bikes down the same road, however an accident leaves them unable to continue riding.  Just then, they meet for the first time for real the younger Ned Flanders and his newlywed wife Maude.  The pair let Homer and Marge ride in their car where they reveal they're still on their honeymoon.  After a brief scene in the present time, the episode flashes back to just five years ago when Homer, Marge, Patty and Selma are returning from a picnic that didn't go so well.  Homer tires of his sisters in law constantly mocking him, and he tosses them out.  A short time later, his car runs out of gas.  Marge is pretty mad at this point but as the two walk to get gas they stumble upon a mansion that's hosting a party, and the two partake for a moment.  Homer comes across a young woman, Sylvia, whose fun-loving style Homer can relate to.  Marge sees the two having fun in horror, and confronting Homer doesn't do any good, and Marge ends up accidentally falling into a pool as she angrily walks away.

In the present, the Simpsons drop off the young couple and reach their destination, the Kozy Kabins, where the scene flashes back to 20 years ago again when the Flanders couple drives up to the same lodge.  Ned ensures that Homer and Marge can't have any pre-marital "snuggling", separating their rooms on each end of the one where he and Maude will enjoy their honeymoon.  Marge calls her sisters in law, who once again try to convince Marge that Homer is no good.  The scene shifts back to five years ago when Homer and Sylvia are still having fun.  Marge is crying her eyes out in a changing room when the host of the party, Alberto, walks up to where Marge is and helps her change into something dry.  He admits he has had his eyes on her since she came to the party, and with Homer's continued partying with Sylvia, Marge agrees to go with Alberto on a glider.  The two land at the very same Kozy Kabins and rent a room.  Just then, Homer and Sylvia arrive nearby, and as Sylvia checks in, Homer notices Marge nearby.  He goes to investigate, panicking Marge and Alberto, the latter hiding in a chest.  Marge and Homer, both trying to hide their intentions, use a make up "snuggle" in a continued attempt to prevent their original intents from being known.  Marge convinces Homer to drag the chest outside, where Homer is quickly able to toss Sylvia into without even noticing Alberto, and he and Marge make up inside the cabin.  In the present day, Homer and Marge "convince" the kids to go away in a paddle car, while at the same time a married Alberto and Sylvia arrive at the cabin with their daughter.  They both recognize Marge and Homer, and thank them for what they did five years ago.  Homer and Marge both realize that their reconciliation five years ago was built on layers of lies, and the two get mad at each other again.

As Bart gets lost with the paddle car, the scene shifts back again to 20 years ago.  While Ned and Maude continue to ensure Homer can't do anything too lewd with Marge, he does take her on a nice walk in the woods, and carves a heart into a nearby tree stating he'll be in love with her forever, though because the tree has so many carvings already Homer has to climb it to find space to carve his heart.  In the present, Homer comes across that same tree, and decides to show Marge the carving in hopes of saving their marriage.  Marge arrives in time ready to talk things out with Homer, but she accidentally knocks the tree over, landing above a cliff to a river.  Homer is hanging on barely by the piece of bark he had partially carved out, and Marge goes to rescue him.  The attempt goes bad, and now Homer rescues her as his bark continues to give way.  As the two once again reconcile their differences, Bart and Lisa arrive in their paddle car to give the two a safe place to land.  The end shows the various couples in love departing the lodge in their various yet kinda merged time frames.

Quick Review
What was this episode?  Its a combination of a marriage episode - that's never good - and a flashback episode which, after That '90s Show, you can't really trust to be good anymore.  The plot continuously jumps from the three timelines, albeit in a smoother fashion than how I tried to explain it above, but the episode makes a critical mistake, one that it seems to be making more often nowadays.  In the effort to have an 'unique' storyline, which is really just a convoluted flashback-marriage episode hybrid, little effort was spend on comedy of any kind.  I spent more time trying to figure out what the hell the episode was trying to do than I was laughing, and I didn't even spend that much time on the former.  It was just a weird episode all around.

Final Score: 5.6

Treehouse of Horror XIX (S20, E04-424)

If that bread had been made with yellow pumpkins, ol' Grandy would've been fine.

Plot Summary
The episode begins after Homer dies from your typical voting day hijinks.

Untitled Robot Parody
Bart is looking for something to give to Lisa for Christmas.  At a shop, a strange toy truck rolls up, but Bart dismisses it.  It then 'transforms' into a pink car, and Bart now decides to buy it.  On Christmas, Lisa is ecstatic that Bart bought her an actual present, but it displays some of its might only to Maggie.  That night, the robot activates several other appliances throughout the house in an attempt to bolster its ranks.  Soon, the "Posibots" rally against their enemies, which Lisa deduces is an ages old conflict spanning galaxies, yet they've chosen Earth for their final battle.  Still, Marge confronts the leaders of both sides, asking why they're even fighting in the first place.  Neither side can remember, and thus make amends by teaming up to enslave humanity.  Fun times.
Individual Score: +0.7

How to Get Ahead in Dead-vertising
Homer and Marge are having a tough time getting Maggie adjusted to day care, but Homer shows Maggie a familiar face on the wall: Krusty's.  However, Krusty arrives in time to have those faces removed, as they had been used without his permission and he wants his cut.  Angry that Krusty made Maggie cry, Homer confronts Krusty outside and pushes him into a swing set in a series of events that eventually lead to Krusty's death.  A short time later, a lawyer and a few advertisers he represents approach Homer.  They tell him that they love using dead celebrities to advertise products because 1) they don't get paid and 2) they can't say no.  They see that Homer has a knack for killing celebrities and so they task him with killing several more so their likenesses can be abused for profit.  Homer agrees, and kills George Clooney, a guy who may or may not of been named Prince at the time, and Neil Armstrong, among others likely.

In heaven, Krusty is bothered by all the shameless ads featuring dead celebrities.  Even George Washington can't believe there's a President's Day ad featuring him kissing Lincoln (though Lincoln seems okay with it).  John Wayne rallies the celebrity angels and, despite Jimmy Stewart's objections, the group storms Earth while Homer and his ad buddies are having a party.  Krusty is able to shoot Homer in the head, killing him.  Unfortunately for them, Homer arrives in heaven just in time to lock the returning celebrities out, and he and Lincoln have the whole place for themselves, which pleases Lincoln a little too greatly.
Individual Score: +0.7

It's the Grand Pumpkin, Milhouse
In an obvious Charlie Brown parody, Milhouse visits his friends Bart and Lisa and retells the tale about the Grand Pumpkin, who visits every pumpkin patch if a kid believes enough in him.  Bart keeps telling Milhouse that he made up that story, but Milhouse still believes.  That night, the other kids make fun of Milhouse as he hangs out at the patch, but Lisa stays with him for awhile.  Eventually, she too tires of the act and demands restitution before leaving.  Saddened, Milhouse sheds a tear, which enables the Grand Pumpkin to come to life.  Milhouse gives the creature pumpkin bread, but when it learns its made from pumpkins, the Grand Pumpkin throws up and promises revenge.  Going around town, the pumpkin eats Homer for carving pumpkins, and upon busting into the school where a party is being held, eats Willie for cooking pumpkin seeds, and Nelson just because, though its learned the Grand Pumpkin is racist against yellow pumpkins.

Milhouse tells Lisa the Grand Pumpkin came to life from Milhouse's childish belief, so Lisa has him fully believe in another tale: Tom Turkey.  Soon, a giant turkey busts in and blows off the Grand Pumpkin's head, saving the three people it ate.  However, Tom Turkey then learns people eat turkeys for Thanksgiving, and promises revenge himself.  Outside, Marge states the kids learned the true value of, well, something anyway.
Individual Score: +0.8

Quick Review
This ended up being a fairly good Treehouse of Horror.  I don't really have any complaints, I mean, its nothing spectacular but at this point its about as good as its ever going to get.  All three stories have their good moments (and their humorless periods), but its hard to find any real faults with them.

Final Score: 7.3

Double, Double, Boy in Trouble (S20, E03-423)

It took 20 seasons for this 'idea' to finally roll along, what took it so long.

Plot Summary
Homer and Bart go to the Kwik-E-Mart to shop.  Apu teases Homer with the last lottery ticket in its roll, but before Homer can buy it he has to stop Bart from jumping off the top of a stand.  After saving Bart, Homer is stunned to learn that Lenny bought the ticket instead, and won $50,000.  Lenny buys everyone a round of drinks at Moe's, then informs everyone that he'll use the rest of his winnings to throw a party for all of his friends.  The Simpson family, of course, is invited, and they go to a hotel that's hosting the event.  There, Bart learns that Lenny plans on giving everyone a giftbag, and finds the room holding them all.  Every bag contains a vacuum robot, so Bart decides to not just turn them on, but also activate their malevolent sentience that was apparently programmed into them as well.  Chaos ensues, and the police arrive in time to catch Bart activating the last few robots.  In anger, Marge decides to strip Bart of one of his last few privileges, and Bart storms off.

In the bathroom, Bart amazingly comes across a near double of him.  However, this boy - Simon Woosterfield - is both intelligent and the son of the hotel's owners.  Simon laments his rich boy life and, having found Bart, wants to trade places with him.  Knowing that Homer is about to go at him for ruining Lenny's part, Bart agrees, and the two switch places.

Though Simon's closest friend - his butler - Bart quickly learns about his new life, with a massive room including a space where the real Joe Montana stays in a pose.  However, Bart also meets his brother-in-law and sister-in-law, two kids are don't like "Simon" all that much because he's due to inherit his family's fortune. but they're next in line.  At a social gathering, Bart runs into Mr. Burns, who isn't even as rich as Simon's parents and thus grovels towards him.  Burns tells Bart that, he, too, was the youngest member of the family, however all the heirs in front of him died either from accidents or poisoned potatoes, leaving Burns with the fortune, and warns Bart that his siblings in law may take him out soon so they can claim the inheritance.  Bart realizes that Simon had actually set Bart up.  Sure enough, a short time later, the siblings in law take Bart to Aspen for a "ski trip".

Simon, meanwhile, has taken a liking to his new life thanks in large part to Marge's care.  Lisa quickly realizes something's wrong with "Bart", and after seeing Simon actually taking an interest in Grampa's rambling, outs Simon's ruse including the part about the ski trip.  She forces Simon to tell Homer and Marge, and the family goes to Aspen to save Bart.  They catch Bart having been sent down a difficult and likely deadly ski course, but Homer is able to rescue Bart.  The two boys return to their previous lives, and Bart wouldn't have it any other way.

Quick Review
This episode is an improvement over the previous two episodes of the season, though once again - a problem that refuses to go away for these latter episodes - the jokes and humor aren't nearly as frequent as they once were.  The plot was alright for the most part, and the scenarios were done adequately enough, so I don't have any complaints with how the episode sets itself up.

Final Score: 7.0

Lost Verizon (S20, E02-422)

...how did Marge know Bart was going to dig up that grave?

Plot Summary
Principal Skinner makes a fool of himself trying to cross a busy highway to get gas for his depleted car.  Milhouse is the first kid to see this, and uses his cell phone to call the other kids in town so they can see it as well.  Every other kid except Bart, who doesn't have one yet.  Bart learns of what happened afterwards, and subsequently begs Marge to get him one, but Marge laments that she can't afford one right now.  Angered, Bart leaves but a short time later he gets hit in the head with a golf ball from a nearby golf course.  He returns it to Dr. Hibbert, who gives him a dollar for the trouble.  Bart realizes if he can return enough golf balls for money, he can buy a phone himself, but the idea falls apart when "Greenskeeper" Willie tells Bart that collecting wayward balls for money is his job.  Nearby, Denis Leary is trying to play a round of golf, but his phone rings just as he makes drive.  He throws it away in frustration, and it just so happens to fly towards Bart.  Bart gladly claims it as his own.

After a short time, Bart realizes the phone was Leary's, and decides to use it to put Leary in all sorts of terrible situations.  Soon, Leary calls Bart, and chews him out.  Marge catches Bart right afterwards and talks with Leary herself.  Leary decides to let Bart keep his old phone, but does tell Marge about the phone's GPS system which would allow her to track Bart wherever he goes on a laptop.  Marge activates it and gives the phone back to Bart.  For some time, every sinister act Bart does is stopped by Marge, who counters his every move.  Lisa catches wind of this, and tells Bart about it that night.  The next day, Bart removes the tracking chip in his phone and attaches it to a nearby bird.  Homer and Marge at home do not think anything is strange about Bart's new movements and they decide to follow him, taking Lisa and Maggie along as well.

Bart has the house to himself for awhile, but while he enjoys himself during the day, nights are particularly scary for him.  Meanwhile, Homer and Marge think they've got "Bart" cornered in a field, when Lisa realizes the chip is on a bird.  Lisa then realizes that the bird is migrating south to Machu Picchu, a place she's been wanting to visit, and thus stays silent as her parents continue chasing the bird.  Eventually, the family does reach Machu Picchu, where a tired Marge falls asleep.  She gets a vision where she learns her constant protection of Bart definitely isn't a good thing.  Upon waking up, she and Homer finally learn of Bart's ruse and head all the way back home.  Bart is happy the family is back, but suddenly its realized they left Maggie at Machu Picchu, where she has become their new god.

Quick Review
This episode is a smidgen better than the previous one, which is to say, its not that good either.  Its too bad, as I felt Denis Leary provided a good guest spot for the episode, but the comedy found within it was just awful.  Hardly any of it was funny aside from Leary and a couple of other instances, and the episode as a whole was just forgettable.

Final Score: 5.9