Love is a Many-Splintered Thing (S24, E12-520)

Why.  Why.

Plot Summary
Bart, dressed up as something that resembles Woody Allen for some reason, narrates the story.  One day, at school, Bart learns that Mary Spuckler has returned after being gone for just 11 episodes.  Mary's acting career is officially over, and she's happily back with her family, and the two decide to resume the relationship they had begun in New York.  However, Bart is mostly dismissive of Mary, opting to do whatever he wants and only passing to Mary bland compliments.  Lisa tries to warn Bart to pay more attention, giving Homer similar advice at the same time for Marge, but neither one really pays attention.  Mary's musical talents earns her a spot in a hillbilly music competition, though she doesn't win.  Bart is unable to console her, but a Brazilian record producer approaches Mary with an opportunity and invites her to dinner with his nice looking son.  Bart isn't particularly interested in going, so Mary decides to leave on her own, dismissive of Bart.

Gaining the help of a Woody Allen caricature, Bart tries to make it up to Mary, but she no longer cares about Bart and officially breaks up with him.  He goes home just in time to see Homer and Marge fighting over something, and yells at Marge over the perception that women never explain what they really want.  As Homer sides with Bart, Marge decides to kick both of them out of the house.  Homer takes Bart to his usual motel in such situations, full of other depressing husbands and such.  Bart tries one more time to call Mary, but she responds with a rather passionate song about how much she's over Bart, which she rather likes.

Homer decides to rally the other husbands, first by having a fun party, but then pools together the resources to invite their wives to the motel as they've gotten a nice orchestra to play a song for them in their attempts to win back their wives' love.  For the most part it works.  Bart was also able to invite Mary for the same purpose, but she isn't biting, and she leaves with her new boyfriend, the aforementioned Brazilian boy.  Back to Woody Allen lookalike narrator Bart, he checks up on Mary's status online, and learns she's married now (because Hillbilly way, I guess) but suddenly her status changes to being single again, and he likes his chances - though its mostly because Mary is now a widow?

Quick Review
Well, this episode has its problems.  Lots of them.  Here, lets list them.

1) Its not very funny.  That's usually a big one.
2) Bringing back Mary Spuckler so soon after she and Bart become a couple, kinda, only to have them break up rather unceremoniously.  Its like the writing staff realized after producing Moonshine River that they didn't like Bart having a sustained love intereste and worked like hell to remedy that.
3) Lisa was being rather pushy this time, which is always annoying and unfunny.
4) Even though the episode is about Bart, there was still enough time to throw in yet another "Homer and Marge hit another bump in the road in their marriage" plot, like there hasn't been enough of those.
5) The whole Woody Allen thing was unnecessary.  The show has spoofed the guy lots of time in the past, albeit never that humorously, and the heavy theme of it this episode was even less comedic.

I'm just gonna stop there.  Its a pretty bad episode, a waste of a Max Weinberg appearance, and is one of the worst episodes of the series thus far.

Final Score: 3.9

Moonshine River (S24, E01-509)

REFERENCES!  YYYYEAH!

Plot Summary
After a failed attempt at running events, Springfield hosts some kind of ball, where Bart makes fun of Lisa and Milhouse who are dancing together.  While Lisa isn't particularly pleased to be with Milhouse, she does have a date, something which Bart lacks.  In fact, Lisa reminds Bart that he can't hold a girlfriend any longer than a week, as once they learn the 'real' Bart Simpson they always leave him.  Stunned by these realizations, Bart decides to try and prove Lisa wrong by showing that at least one of his old girlfriends still like him.  After three such girls adamantly prove they don't, and a fourth too bipolar to figure out, Bart's down to his last option: Mary Spuckler, whom Bart had befriended but only got into a relationship with to save a cow.  He visits Cletus, but the slack-jawed yokel admits that Mary ran off some time earlier after being forced to wed another hillbilly, but neither he nor Brandine know where.  One of Mary's brothers knows, though, and privately tells Bart she went to New York City, even giving him an address.  Bart tries to convince his parents to go, but Homer tries to remember the last time the family went to New York (although Homer now remembers it differently, perhaps blocking out what really happened).  Still, a bit later, Homer decides to take Bart and the family there, having tricked a family from New York into swapping their house with Flanders' home for a couple of weeks.

After arriving in New York, Marge and Lisa go off on their own to embrace the city's culture on a budget (in other words, doing nothing).  Homer takes Bart to the address Mary's brother gave him, and as Homer takes his leave, Bart meets up with a drastically different-looking Mary.  Mary reveals she's gotten some experience in writing in New York and she's happy both to be in New York and to see Bart again, just so long as she doesn't get found out.  The two spend some time together, and are about to share a kiss, but Cletus comes out of nowhere to find Mary and take her home.  Mary is able to sneak off with Bart a short time later, though, and is able to hitch a train to an unknown location.  While she's forced to be away from Bart once again, she does admit she likes him.  Because of that, Bart refuses to tell Cletus where Mary is going, and Cletus gives up.  On the way home, Cletus gives Bart a picture with Mary in it, while Marge and Lisa - the latter staging a Shakespeare play after a scheduled one had been cancelled only to be met by police for essentially "occupying" the theater - somewhat lament their difficulties.

Quick Review
Self-reference: the episode.  So many guest stars, too, equaling Homer at the Bat with ten guest spots.  Unlike that episode, where each guest played a pivotal part in that episode's plot, Moonshine River's guests were often cameos.  The guests who played Bart's four previous girlfriends got in a single line or phrase and that was it.  Al Roker had no reason to be there outside of a gag.  Kevin Michael Richardson's been voicing somebody in lots of episodes recently, none of which had any impact in their respective episodes.  What I'm trying to say is, aside from Zooey Deschanel, who voices Mary, most of the guest cast in this episode was fairly pointless.

Going back to my first point, this episode is also full of self references, but they are only that.  Never mind that Homer hated New York in Season 9 because it was a scum hole when he was younger and still wasn't perfect back in the late 90s, suddenly Homer is more than fine with the sketchier side of the city.  The 'reference' of the Klauh Karesh vendor who now owns a giant restaurant was pointless, too.  The episode also references that, yeah, Bart has had several girlfriends, but its odd the episode would focus on a girl whom Bart wasn't particularly fond of in her original episode.  Writers can't even references episodes from just a few years ago correctly now.

So, you take all of that poor referencing, an unfunny main plot involving Bart being liked by a girl, and the lame side plot with Marge and Lisa, and it makes for a very underwhelming episode.  This episode actually scores a little better than that as some of the jokes were pretty decent, but its still nothing good.

Final Score: 6.4

Beware My Cheating Bart (S23, E18-504)

I'm not even 30 yet, but the old man in me couldn't cringe at this scene hard enough.

Plot Summary
Homer takes Bart to a mall with a movie theatre, dropping him and Milhouse off at a movie so he can go enjoy the food court, but is so out of shape a salesman is easily able to convince him to buy a state-of-the-art treadmill that comes with its own top notch television.  Meanwhile, Bart runs afoul of Jimbo, Dolph, Kearney and Jimbo's girlfriend Shauna.  Shauna doesn't want to see the movie the bullies do, but Jimbo doesn't want to leave Shauna alone as a target of someone else's eyes, so he orders Bart to prevent anybody from getting a peek at his girl, and Bart is forced to comply.  Bart does make someone stop talking with Shauna, and she's impressed with what Bart just did.  Jimbo forces Bart to spend time with Shauna again the next day, where Bart takes the fall for her shoplifting.  Shauna is really impressed with Bart's noble act and takes him to a private area to give him a reward, flashing her breasts at him for a good second or two.

The act leaves Bart stunned for quite awhile, but later on at school, Jimbo leaves Shauna with Bart yet again.  Bart gathers enough courage to tell Shauna that Jimbo is a jerk and she should stop going out with him.  Shauna is surprised someone is actually looking out for her, and takes a liking to Bart.  The two start going on in secret, kissing each other whenever possible, but eventually Jimbo catches Bart in the act and is ready to whale on him, but thanks to a distraction Bart is able to flee from him and the other bullies for awhile.  Bart tries to go home, but the bullies are not only waiting for him there, they've gained Marge's favor as well.  Shauna sides with Bart and he decides to hide out at the comic book store with her until the heat dies down, but Shauna insults the comic book guy, resulting in him calling the bullies over to catch Bart.

This time Bart is able to make it back to the treehouse with Shauna, and that's when Lisa pops in.  Lisa, whose been aware of Bart's story, decides its time to intervene.  Jimbo finds the three, but Lisa calmly advises Shauna to not go back with the jerk Jimbo, or the dorky Bart, but rather just "be Shauna" she actually says.  Shauna takes those words to heart, but Jimbo still has to take care of Bart.

Homer, in the meantime, starts off okay on the treadmill, but he learns from Lisa that the attached television can connect to the internet, and it can stream shows that ended several years ago.  Homer takes a liking to one such show: Stranded, a deep, confusing show full of island mysteries and plot holes.  Even so, Homer becomes deeply entrenched in the show's plot, and stops bothering to use the treadmill to actually run.  Eventually ditching the treadmill, Homer instead grabs DVDs of the show to keep watching non stop, which continues to annoy Marge - who saw the show in its initial run but couldn't get Homer to watch at the time because he said it was pretentious.  Homer even hosts a viewing party for the show, even though he's only three seasons in and everyone else already knows how it ends.  Marge finally has enough and quickly spoils the show for Homer before he can silence her.  This act upsets Homer pretty badly, but Marge makes it up to him by giving him some island-themed sex as Jimbo beats Bart up outside.

Quick Review
Shauna first appeared as part of a gag in the Season 20 episode The Good, the Sad and the Drugly, which was also an episode where Bart falls in love with a girl.  She's made one or two other appearances since, so its kinda odd she gets such a focus in this episode.

Neither that storyline nor the sideplot with Homer obsessing over the obvious Lost parody several years too late started off all that badly, but the last several minutes were just disastrous.  The 'flame war' between comic book guy and Shauna was just dreadful.  Needing to bring in Lisa from out of nowhere to settle the episode's conflict seems like such a boring cop out, and the ending the sideplot felt pretty rushed as well.  These factors combined to basically ruin the episode.

Final Score: 6.3

Stealing First Base (S21, E15-456)

When one assumes the role of Bart Simpson, one must assume all of the risks.

Plot Summary
Mrs. Krabappel is away for a few days, but as the school can't afford a substitute, her 4th grade class merges with the other 4th grade for the interim.  As Nelson ends up befriending a blind boy, the adventures of which are touched upon throughout the episode, Bart sits next to Nikki, a girl whom Bart is able to befriend.  Bart also has feelings for her, but going to Homer yields no advice other than to talk to Grampa about women.  So, Bart gets advice from Grampa to 'steal' a kiss from Nikki to gauge how interested she really is toward him.  The next day, Bart does so, but Nikki is left disgusted by the act.  Soon, Nikki's parents, both of whom are uptight lawyers, threaten to sue both the school and Bart's parents if measures aren't taken to prevent PDAs at the school.  Superintendent Chalmers and Principal Skinner are forced to comply, and Homer and Marge are forced to prevent Bart from seeing Nikki again.  However, once the ban is in place, Nikki sees and subsequently kisses Bart herself, confusing the hell out of him.  Still, he doesn't mind kissing, and the two are together again, I guess.

Meanwhile, Lisa is given an F on her test.  As she begins to think about doomsday scenarios, she starts noticing people are starting to like her because of the F she got.  However, Ms. Hoover tells Lisa in front of everyone that the F was actually for Ralph and Lisa actually got an A+++.  Now everyone hates her again.  Lisa complains about it on her organic gardening blog where she gets a rather quick reply to keep in good spirits from a "Flotus1".  Some time later, a helicopter flies in, revealing the first lady of the United States - Michelle Obama (voiced by someone else, though).  Michelle points out Lisa, as 'Flotus' is an acronym for "First Lady of the United States" and therefore is an avid follower of Lisa's blog, and tells everyone not to mess with the academics because they'll rule the world when they grow up and you don't want to be on their list.

As the helicopter leaves, Bart and Nikki are on the roof, and while they enjoyed that moment, Bart tries to imply the two are a couple, which Nikki can't stand the thought of.  Bart has enough and tries to leave before she hurts him, but bumps into an air duct and falls off the building.  He's unconscious and having trouble breathing, but nobody in the school can give Bart CPR because of the ban on PDAs.  Nikki makes her way towards Bart anyway and gives him CPR anyway, saving Bart's life maybe.  The ban on PDAs is lifted, and Nikki remains hot and cold to Bart, who still has no idea what's going on.

Quick Review
So, this was a poor episode.  It really gives off a, I dunno, a feeling of disconnect.  Between Michelle Obama appearing telling kids to be friends with the smart kids, to the Itchy & Scratchy movie cartoon fully parodying a 'deep' cult movie, to the cliched main storyline complete with oversensitive lawyer parents, the entire episode seemed really out of place even compared to other episodes of this season, and it was difficult finding anything even worth a smirk, Nelson's tertiary story and Grampa's appearance being the closest things to humor there was.

Final Score: 5.7

The Good, the Sad and the Drugly (S20, E17-437)

Maybe Milhouse is getting revenge over what Bart did to him and his girlfriend.

Plot Summary
Bart and Milhouse pull another prank at school by removing every screw inside somehow.  However, Milhouse and only Milhouse is caught, but he refuses to rat out Bart, getting suspended for a week for his part in the prank.  Bart visits Milhouse at home quickly, and promises to visit every day.  Just then, Homer comes to pick Bart up so he can spend 'quality' time with Grampa.  As Bart just stands there at the retirement home, a beautiful girl comes in and catches Bart's eye.  The girl, Jenny, is a good Samaritan, so in order to impress her, Bart tries to show her he's a good boy as well.  This includes him saving ducks from bullies (who are trying to impress another girl), and telling Jenny that he spends a lot of time "working with this mentally challenged guy" aka Homer.

In the meantime, Lisa begins a social studies report on what Springfield will be like in 50 years.  She goes on the internet for help, when she comes across several doomsday scenarios that she takes to heart.  At school, a now deluded Lisa warns everyone of the future ahead, concerning all.  Later, Principal Skinner speaks with Lisa and suggests she visit a psychiatrist.  Lisa does so with her parents, and the psychiatrists suggests the depressed Lisa should start taking "happy pills".  Lisa agrees to do it, having lost all faith in everything anyway, and melts in forced joy as everything she sees turns into happy faces.

Bart invites Jenny over for dinner one night, and he believes everything is going his way.  Just then, a rather ominous storm starts up just as someone knocks on the door.  Bart answers it to find Milhouse standing there.  Milhouse is distraught that Bart has yet to visit his best friend, and learns that Bart is trying to hide his past so that he can be with Jenny.  Milhouse doesn't really care about that, though, and promises to make Bart's life difficult for lying to him.  Sure enough, Milhouse hounds Bart with his presence and his warnings of spilling the beans to Jenny.  Eventually, Bart can't take it anymore and reveals his past to Jenny.  Although Bart has made vast improvements to impress Jenny, she hates that their relationship was built on lies, and breaks up with him.

Lisa, meanwhile, has a close call when she comes close to kissing an electric fan Maggie is holding that she sees as another happy face.  Marge intervenes in time and tosses out Lisa's remaining pills, though the dog gets into that trash and gets enticed by Maggie's fan as well.  Later, a recovered Lisa talks with a depressed Bart, telling him that its pointless to wallow in despair, and to face his problems as they are.  Bart takes the suggestion to heart, and buys some flowers to apologize... to Milhouse for prioritizing a girl over their friendship.  Milhouse graciously accepts the apology and the two combine once more for another big prank at school.

Quick Review
Season 20 continues a trend of decent episodes with this worthwhile effort, an episode that definitely has its moments.  Lisa's side story was a bit odd, but there really wasn't anything wrong with it.  The main plot is the episode's strong point, especially when Milhouse is involved, and is the reason the episode scored as well as it did.

Final Score: 7.2

Little Big Girl (S18, E12-390)

Bart... might have a fetish I wasn't aware of until now.

Plot Summary
Lisa is vexed over a report on her family's heritage as her family's heritage is absolutely boring.  Frustrated, Lisa decides instead to make up a Native American heritage about herself, claiming herself to be from the "Hitachi" tribe.  The report does so well in school, she's asked to give it again at city hall.  A panicked Lisa does so later, even being confronted by a Native American reporter whom she's barely able to make content.  Later, Lisa is asked to give a presentation about her supposed tribe at a Native American convention at Capitol City, where she finally gives up and reveals her lies.  At first she is chided, but when she is instead praised for her courage, other Native stand up and reveal they aren't really Native Americans, either.

Meanwhile, a fire break outs throughout town, including near the school where Principal Skinner learns that someone has taken all of the fire extinguishers.  On the outskirts of town, Bart has those extinguishers, planning to use them as propulsion for his wheelbarrow.  It works rather well as Bart zoom through town, and as an added benefit the extinguishers also take care of the nearby fires across town.  Bart is heralded as a hero and Mayor Quimby offers Bart any one thing he wants, and Bart decides to get a legitimate driver's license.

Bart has fun with his license at first, but Homer starts bugging Bart to do all kinds of errands and creepily odd tasks for him.  Bart finally has enough and gets away from Springfield for awhile, driving all the way to North Haverbrook.  There, he applies his charms and actually gets a girl to go with him.  The somewhat older girl, Darcy, buys Bart's crazy explanation as to why he seems so young, and the two go on dates and kiss and stuff.  One day, though, Darcy offers a couple of bombshell: she wants to marry him, or else they break up.  Bart reluctantly goes to the marriage office to get a marriage license, but when he tries to back away by revealing he actually is ten years old, Darcy reveals another bombshell: she's pregnant with another guy's baby.

Bart really tries to back out now, but Darcy reveals that her parents are strict about marriage, and that if she had the baby without a husband, they'd kill her.  Bart gives up and the two go to a state where marriage laws are loose enough for them to marry: Utah.  Eventually, both Bart's and Darcy's parents catch wind of this and find them at a chapel about to get married.  Darcy's parents reveal that her mother is also pregnant and that they can pass Darcy's baby off as a twin to that, so there's no need for Bart to marry.  Bart is relieved, and the two break up on good terms.

Quick Review
It was another less-than episode for the season.  Nothing all that bad, but nothing all that funny, either.  Lisa's story was the best the episode had to offer, but it was pretty washed aside once it focused on Bart and Darcy's plot.

Final Score: 6.2

The Wandering Juvie (S15, E16-329)

Boy, I hope Bart doesn't develop some odd fetish from this years later.

Plot Summary
The Simpsons go to the mall one day.  Bart learns about the wedding gift registry in one store, and decides to run a massive prank by registering himself and "Lotta Cooties" as a couple and getting people to buy presents for a fake wedding.  It seems to go off without a hitch, but Bart is caught trying to sneak away with presents by Chief Wiggum, who only accepts cash bribes.  In court, Judge Harm sentences Bart to six months of juvenile hall, this time for real.

Bart has a hard time adjusting in juvenile hall, what with everyone beating him up all the time.  Even the girl juveniles, led by a rather tough girl named Gina, give him distress.  Homer gets a job as a guard to protect Bart, but his shifts are too infrequent to do Bart any good.  One night, the hall hosts a mandatory dance on the premise that knowing how to dance reduces the chance of causing a double homicide.  Gina pairs up with Bart, the two shackled together by the Warden, but Gina eyes an escape route and makes her move, dragging Bart along for the ride, even though Bart only had two weeks left to serve.

With Gina threatening to play the victim and blame the escape all on Bart, the latter has no choice but to follow along for now.  The two get to know each other a little bit, with Gina telling Bart that once they get the shackles off she's going to hide out with her parents.  The two reach a blacksmith out in the woods who forges keys to unlock shackles, no questions asked.  Gina leaves rather forcefully, and when Bart goes to get in a last word, he sees her crying.  Turns out, Gina doesn't even have a family.  Bart tries to calm her down, but Gina snaps and attacks Bart.  Chief Wiggum finally catches up to the two, and plans to have both of them go back to jail for a long time.  Gina, in a change of heart, admits full responsibility for the escape, and so Bart is free to go (even though Bart still has a couple of weeks, but Wiggum doesn't care).  Gina goes back to juvie, but Bart brings the family to her jail cell for a taco dinner in appreciation for what she did.

Quick Review
In most of these Season 15 episodes, the funny starts off strong but dies near the end.  The comedy in this episode is more spread out, though that doesn't mean the episode is that much funnier as a result.  The episode, like most others this season, has its moments like the one bit with Homer as a guard, and Chief Wiggum had a few good moments too, but again the quantity of good jokes just isn't there anymore.

Final Score: 7.2

Bart's Girlfriend (S06, E07-110)

"YA USED ME SKINNER, YA UUUUUUSED MEEEEE!!!"

Plot Summary
After being rounded up for church, Bart becomes greatly infatuated with Jessica Lovejoy, the young daughter of the Reverend just back from boarding school.  Bart tries to play the 'good boy' routine to try and appeal to her, but Jessica visually ignores him.  Bart eventually gives up and decides to air out his frustrations by pulling a prank.  Noticing Groundskeeper Willie celebrating "Scotchtoberfest" wearing tradition Scotsman wear including a kilt, Bart pulls up Willie's kilt, revealing his privates to the crowd.  Though Bart revels in a job well done, it turns out to be a setup by Skinner: there is no actual Scotchtoberfest (much to Willie's anger), and Bart gets three months of detention.  Jessica sees this happen and, perhaps out of pity, invites Bart over for dinner.

At that dinner, Bart's anecdotes about FOX programming do not sit well with the Lovejoy household, and he is thusly forbidden by the Reverend from seeing his daughter.  Waiting outside for him, though, is Jessica, who admits she likes bad boys, and the two hit it off, forcing the relationship to be secret given her parents' disapproval.  Soon, the relationship takes its toll on Bart, as Jessica proves to be an even bigger troublemaker than Bart ever was, which is too much for Bart to handle.  Bart decides to break off from Jessica at church, and though she admits she goes too far at times, she then steals the money from the church collection plate insisting she needs it for a new start.  Leaving Bart with the empty plate, Jessica leaves as Bart is the one blamed for the lost money.

Now hated across town for his supposed misdeed, Bart doesn't reveal who actually took the money.  Bart tries to confront Jessica over it, but Jessica would still rather have Bart take the fall, under the probably correct premise that nobody will take Bart's word over the Reverend's daughter.  At this point Lisa decides to step in and on the following Sunday is able to convince churchgoers that Jessica took the money, urging the mass to look in her room for the money.  Jessica's cry for attention goes ignored by the Reverend, and Bart is forgiven for the deed he never committed.  Bart visits Jessica again as she is cleaning the church steps as punishment, as showing that neither have learned their lesson, Jessica convinces Bart to finish her job as she runs off with another boy, though Bart gets a good laugh over the mess the boy is getting himself into, as well as the subpar job he'll be giving the steps he's cleaning.

Quick Review
Bart's Girlfriend was a solid episode, it had a nice premise but it didn't have the quantity of quality of jokes to make it one of the season's best.  In just two appearances, Willie sort of steals the show with his Scotchtoberfest act as well as his attempts to "save the wee turtles" after Jessica pulls the fire alarm, those were both great moments in the episode.  Jessica, voiced by Meryl Streep, was a wonderful one-time character as well.

Final Score: 8.6

New Kid on the Block (S04, E08-067)

Its no wonder I don't see as many all you can eats these days...

Plot Summary
As I've said in another episode review (specifically Bart the Lover), these earlier episode rarely have Bart in a position where he's even infatuated with another girl.  In the Season 3 episode Bart's Friend Falls in Love, he even says to Milhouse that such things are not a concern to him at the episode's end.  It may or may not explain a lot that these later seasons have several episodes where Bart has a girlfriend.  In any case, New Kid on the Block is the first episode in which Bart actually finds himself in love with another girl.

It happens after the elderly couple the Winfields decide to move out.  Despite struggles to sell the house due to potential buyers seeing and being disgusted by Homer's antics, the house eventually does sell.  Shortly thereafter, Bart and Lisa sneak into the basement of that house from outside, and after Bart scares Lisa away with a horror tale, he is snuck up on by another person, scaring him so hard he passes out.  Upon coming to, he sees a girl somewhat older than her - Laura Powers - and instantly becomes infatuated with her.

Meanwhile, Homer sees a commercial for an "all you can eat" seafood restaurant and decides to go there with Marge (despite Marge having an allergy to fish).  Bart suggests Laura be their babysitter for the night, and with Homer eager to eat non-stop he agrees.  As Laura continues to unintentionally steal Bart's heart, Homer indeed eats non-stop at the restaurant, going late into the night.  Finally, the restaurant's owner, then named Captain McCallister, kicks Homer out after Homer practically ate everything.  Still, upset that he did not eat all he could eat, Homer decides to sue the restaurant (Lionel Hutz later calls Homer the greatest hero in American history).

The next day or so, Bart begins asking around for tips to get Laura to notice him.  Talks with Grampa and Homer are mostly fruitless.  Frustrated, Bart is surprised to see Laura call him to the treehouse.  There, Laura tells him shocking news: she has a boyfriend and, worse yet, its Jimbo Jones.  Devastated (and not too happy when he overhears Laura saying "he's just a kid" after leaving with Jimbo), Bart is determined to prove himself to her.

The day Homer's lawsuit goes to court arrives, and again Laura is babysitting.  This night, Laura has Jimbo come over for a "study session".  Needing to act quickly, Bart decides to prank call Moe, but afterwards tell Moe that he's Jimbo Jones, providing an address as well, knowing full well Moe would come rushing over to enact some kind of vengeance after all those prank calls.

Meanwhile, Homer's court case is moving along nicely.  It turns out Captain McCallister is not actually a sea captain, and Marge retells the story of that night, where after being kicked out they tried to find another all you can eat seafood restaurant and, upon failing to find one, going fishing instead.  Losing the favor of a rather overweight jury, the Captain decides to make a plea deal with Homer: Homer can indeed eat all he can eat at the restaurant, while the Captain advertises him as some kind of bottomless stomach monster to attract customers into that kind of horrific thing.

Finally, Moe comes rushing in, with a rusty, dull blade in hand, and goes right for Jimbo.  Jimbo quickly breaks down crying, killing Moe's blood lust and Laura's regular lust.  As Moe quickly leaves to limit Barney's beer-stealing opportunities, Laura sees Jimbo for what he really is and tells him they're through.  She tells Bart he was right about Jimbo, and notes that if Bart were older, she'd go out with him anytime.  They prank call Moe, who falls for it yet again.

Quick Review
This was a great episode.  The main story had a lot going for it as we see a new side to Bart we've barely seen in the past, and the whole thing with Moe was great to.  Like usual, though, its Homer's sidestory which steals the show in terms of pure hilarity.  The notion of him eating non stop for hours, then suing the restaurant for not letting him eat all he could eat afterwards is just so ridiculous, but then for him to actually get some justice for it... somehow it ends up being very hilarious.

Final Score: 9.4