The Winter of His Content (S25, E14-544)

At long last Grampa can be proud of his son.

Plot Summary
The Springfield Retirement Castle is forced to close down due to several health violations.  As Homer and Marge go to take Grampa home, Marge notices two other old men with nowhere to go: Jasper and the "Old Jewish Man".  Feeling sorry for them, Marge lets them come home with them and Grampa.  Naturally, Homer and Marge have difficulty taking care of the three old men and their various needs.  Homer is nearing a breaking point but is encouraged by Lisa to be nicer to them at the very least.  Homer takes Lisa's advice to heart and decides to spend time with the old men.  Upon doing so, he comes to realize that with 6 AM breakfast, mall walking that counts as exercise, among other things, the old man lifestyle can actually be really great.  As such, Homer does everything possible to become an old man, which bothers Marge immensely.

Meanwhile, at school, its learned Nelson is forced to wear his mom's old panties, being unable to afford his own.  As kids laugh at Nelson, Bart decides to stand up for Nelson, revealing he, too, wears hand-me-down underwear.  Afterward, Nelson is extremely grateful to Bart, so much so that he takes Bart to a bully hideout where Jimbo and pals make Bart an honorary bully.  Later, they decide to attend a bully convention out of town, but while there a rather radical bully hits the leader of the bully congregation with Bart's slingshot, pinning the blame on Bart.

Bart and the bullies find a way to escape the wrath of the bully congregate, with Nelson sacrificing himself for the cause, but the radical bully and his gang chase the four all the way back to Springfield, setting up a possible beatdown.  Homer and the old men chance upon this, and with the old men unwilling (and/or possibly unable) to help, Homer realizes he's still a bit too young to consider himself old and rushes in to punch away the radical bully and his gang, saving Bart and the others.

Quick Review
The episode started off strong, as I really enjoyed the old man and Homer storyline.  I didn't expect the Bart sidestory to take over the latter portion of the episode, though, and considering how weak that subplot was it really brought the episode down.  The episode also ended in a rather sudden, awkward manner that didn't work at all.  This episode had some potential that just fell apart when it shifted away from that potential.

Final Score: 7.1

Replaceable You (S23, E04-490)

Look at her expression, she was gunning for his job all along.

Plot Summary
A science fair is coming up, and Bart doesn't have anything good lined up.  With Lisa mocking Bart about it, Bart sees Martin left hanging on a tree branch.  He frees Martin then asks to team up with him for the science fair, which Martin agrees to do conditionally.  After some brainstorming, the two decide to make a robotic baby seal, whose cuteness is irresistible.  However, Martin builds it in a way where a single crossed wire turns the lovable toy into a vicious, murderous beast.  Even so, the two enter it into the fair, and they end up winning first prize.  For some reason, they go to the retirement home to celebrate, and the baby seal ends up cheering up a depressed Jasper, and an otherwise upset Lisa realizes just how much of a positive impact Bart has made.

Meanwhile, Homer gets an assistant at work for no apparent reason.  Homer takes the woman, Roz, through the ropes, then tries to have her cover for him as he sneaks out to watch a movie with Barney.  When returning home, though, Homer is greeting by Mr. Burns, who was informed of Homer's departure, and demotes Homer.  Homer realizes that it was Roz who ratted him out, especially since he's her assistant now, and she's treating him like absolute dirt.  Flanders talks to Homer about it, and Flanders figures out that its the same Roz he met some time ago in a bible study, and reveals to Homer Roz's biggest weakness: she freaks out if she's hugged.  A short time later, Mr. Burns plans on giving Roz the "employee of the millennium" award, but Homer steps in and urges Burns to hug Roz.  Burns obliges, and as expected Roz freaks out and throws Burns aside.  Burns quickly fires Roz, and the status quo is returned.

Other seniors take a liking to the seal, and ask Bart and Martin to make more.  The newfound happiness of seniors is dismal news for the funeral industry, who are losing money now that the elderly have reasons to live.  They learn of the crossed wire flaw, though, and find a way to make the seals vicious.  This move subsequently results in the death of Mrs. Glick, and the robot seals are confiscated by the police.  Bart and Martin realize what's happened, but decide to seek further help.  They get it from Professor Frink, and with a small team of nerds are able to help the seals escape from jail while also reprogramming them to never be malicious again.  The seniors are reunited with their cute toys which is reason to celebrate, but its revealed the seals still have vicious tendencies which is reason for the funeral industry to celebrate, which is reason for Mrs. Glick and Jesus to celebrate in heaven as I guess they'll be getting people to join them real soon.

Quick Review
This episode starts off okay with the science fair plot and the humor is decent throughout.  The plot with Homer and Roz has some pretty decent moments but wasn't all that great.  The episode ends on a dumb note with the dance montage including the rather pointless death of a D-list character.  That sequence really detracts from the episode as bits featuring Chief Wiggum and Dr. Nick really did their best to boost the humor of the episode but not by enough.

Final Score: 6.9

The Old Man and the Key (S13, E13-282)

Grampa sure showed that cloud who's boss.

Plot Summary
The Simpsons are given a call from the retirement home stating Grampa has died.  However, upon visiting, they learn that Grampa is still alive and well, as it was a man named "Stimpson" who died.  Stimpson's old room is quickly filled by a new senior, a rather foxy old lady by the name of Zelda.  Ol' Abe quickly sets his sights on her, but she instead hooks up with a suave old man - Zack - who owns and drives his own minivan.

Realizing that Zelda likes men who can drive, Grampa goes to the Simpsons home to plead for help in getting him a new driving license, having lost his old one in an aquarium incident.  Homer refuses to help, and Marge only agrees to do so after tiring of listening to Grampa whine and whine.  Grampa quickly gets his new driving license, but still doesn't have a car to drive.  Still, he's somehow able to get Homer to lend Grampa his car on a double date with Zelda.

On a later date, Grampa goes all the way with Zelda inside Homer's car, not going home until the next morning.  Homer and Marge confront Grampa that morning and insinuate Zelda is a hoochie, only with Grampa because he can drive.  Further, Homer restricts Grampa's access to his car, only letting him go to the store and such.  So, that's what Grampa does, but unwittingly draws the ire of some old man gang at the Kwik-E-Mart.  The confrontation leads, of course, to a death race against the other gang, and Grampa is forced to drive Homer's car in said race.  Grampa wins, but crashes the car right in Homer's backyard.  Homer insists Grampa will never drive again, ever.

Grampa walks back to the retirement home, with Zelda waiting out front.  She had set up a room for the two of them in Branson, Missouri, but when Grampa informs her he doesn't have a car anymore, she quickly goes back to Zack, and they go to Branson instead.  Grampa goes back to the Simpson house and attempts to hotwire Marge's car so he can give chase.  Bart helps him hotwire it, and goes with Grampa on his drive down to Missouri.  Homer and Marge learn about the stolen car soon enough and they along with Lisa take a bus down to Branson as well (who knows what happens with Maggie).

Grampa and Bart reach Branson and see Zelda and Zack go to a show.  The two sneak in through the back, and with the other Simpsons closing in on them, Grampa makes his move.  He gets on stage, and he calls for Zelda to join him.  However, when she gets there, Grampa reveals that he did all of this for one reason: to call Zelda a hoochie, as nobody breaks up with Grampa and gets away with it.  He leads a chant amongst the crowd and Zelda runs off in embarrassment.  Grampa then calls Homer up and they make amends.

Quick Review
I enjoy Grampa Simpson as a character, and I usually enjoys episodes where he's the focus.  I... can't really say I enjoyed this episode all that much.  It has its moments, like the 'old man yells at cloud' bit, but most of the time the laughs came from moments that had little to do with the main plot.  Whenever Zelda was on the screen, I felt fairly sure I wouldn't be laughing, and that was pretty much true.

Final Score: 7.1

The Old Man and the C Student (S10, E20-223)

Grampa looks like an old Homer, that is the joke occurring here.

Plot Summary
A letter Lisa wrote for school asking the Olympic Committee to have the torch runner pass through Springfield turns into the Olympic Committee heavily considering Springfield to host the whole damn thing.  Homer enters a spring with googly eyes for a mascot competition, which eventually wins.  The Olympic Committee is impressed with the town, as well as a song the Springfield Elementary children sing during the proceedings.  Just before Springfield officially wins the bid, Principal Skinner introduces the final act: the comedy stylings of Bart Simpson.  Bart uses his time to make fun of every country represented in the committee.  Outraged, the committee retract their bid for Springfield and leave hastily.  Bart is blamed for costing Springfield the Olympics (and the other kids are also to blame for finding his act funny), so they all are forced to do 20 hours of community service.

Bart's community service takes place at the retirement home, where Lisa had actually been volunteering for the past year.  Bart is taken aback by how the seniors are treated like babies: they get vacuumed for crumbs during nap time, they win soft bananas in bingo (where the phrase "you sunk my battleship" is popular), and the movies are heavily edited to have happy endings.  Bart feels pity for the old folks as they can't ever really have "fun" anymore.  Finding an opportunity, Bart sneaks them all out of the home and, after some frolicking in the field, takes them on a boat ride where there's limboing and such.

Meanwhile, Homer gets in a shipment for a thousand springs, no longer relevant now that the Olympics aren't coming to Springfield.  After several failed attempts to sell or otherwise implement the springs, Marge forces Homer to get rid of them.  He does so - by flushing them one by one down the toilet.

Lisa catches up to Bart on the boat, and though she is ready to get mad at him for what he did, realizes that the seniors are having fun, and eases up.  However, as the captain of the boat is blind, they get run into by another boat, causing it to sink.  Jack LaLanne tries to save the boat, but it breaks apart even further.  The boat sinks, but rises back up, which keeps happening.  As it turns out, the springs Homer is flushing are coming out from a pipe that just so happens to be directly below the boat.  It gives a rescue copter enough time to save everyone, and though Bart's community service is done, he's more than happy enough to come back and help Grampa and the others limbo and such.

Quick Review
This ended up being a fairly good episode.  The Olympic opening had its moments, and Homer's subsequent spring subplot was fine, but the main plot was strong as well aside from a couple of missteps, keeping this episode's score somewhat strong.

Final Score: 8.1

Lisa the Simpson (S09, E17-195)

Its like watching a bunch of bootleg Homer's together.

Plot Summary
Lisa becomes frustrated over a puzzle featured on the back of a box, more so because everyone else has figured it out.  Further, she forgets her locker combination as well as her agriculture project, so she's having a pretty bad couple of days, intellectually.  Grampa catches wind of Lisa's dilemma and doesn't think much of it as he presumes that she's beginning to undergo the effects of the "Simpson" gene, a defective gene that kicks in at about age 8 that turns all otherwise intelligent Simpsons into dopes.  It's happened to Grampa, Homer and Bart, and now the devastated Lisa is next.

In a subplot, old man Jasper freezes himself inside a fridge at the Kwik-E-Mart, with Apu not realizing the scheme until its too late.  Jasper wishes to see the future (and to have his pants changed depending on the trends of the time), and is still alive within.  Though Apu is initially dismayed over what's happened, he eventually turns the Kwik-E-Mart into a profitable freakshow, with Jasper the main attraction.  However, despite Apu's attempts otherwise, Jasper is able to thaw, his plan a technical success, and walks off to discover the 'future'.  Needing a new revenue stream, Apu turns the freak show into a Nude-E-Mart.

Meanwhile, Lisa realizes that there's no escaping her genes, and tries to accept the fact that she'll become 'a Simpson', but finds it too terrible to bear.  Instead, Lisa decides to use one final night to 'feed' her brain with culture.  That same night, she's able to get on TV for an 'editorial' as she lets off some steam.  At this point, the Simpson family understands what's going on with Lisa (especially as Grampa also lets them know about the Simpson gene).  Homer scoffs at the notion, and spends the night making calls.

The next morning, Lisa wakes up to find Homer, Bart, and every Simpson in the tri-city area.  Homer attempts to prove there's no such thing as the Simpson gene, but every Simpson he talks to is, in one way or another, a failure.  Lisa's hopes quickly fade, but Marge points out that Homer hasn't talked to a female Simpson yet.  Turns out, the few that are there have all become successful in their lines of high quality work.  One Simpson, a doctor, reveals that the Simpson gene is in fact real, but is on the Y-chromosome so it only affects male Simpsons.  Lisa is rejuvenated by the news, thanks Homer for cheering her up (and Bart is mostly unfazed by learning he's going to be a massive failure), and a short time later is able to figure out that puzzle she got stuck on earlier.

Quick Review
This episode, despite being in the latter half of Season 9, is the last episode to be run by Bill Oakley and Josh Weinstein, who ran the show for Seasons 7 and 8.  Its all Mike Scully from here on.

The episode itself was good, not among the best of the season, but it holds it own.  The Jasper subplot was wonderful but brief, and the main plot has its moments but nothing too spectacular.

Final Score: 8.7

Who Shot Mr. Burns? Part Two (S07, E01-129)

"Yeah, that's what they all say.  They all say 'd'oh'."

Plot Summary
Recalling what happened in Part One, there are several suspects for the shooting of Mr. Burns, currently in a coma.  The one with the highest level of suspicion?  Waylon Smithers, who as the episode begins is a complete wreck, his mouth full of cigarettes and watching Comedy Central of all things.  Trying to recall what happened around the time Burns was shot, he recalls pulling out a gun and shooting an unclear victim.  Smithers believes from this that he shot Burns, and soon confesses as much to the police.  However, as Smithers appears on TV after being indicted, he quotes a line from Pardon My Zinger, a program on Comedy Central back in the 90s I guess.  Watching this interview, Sideshow Mel notices the coincedence, and recalls that Smithers wouldn't miss that program, noting it odd that anyone would watch Comedy Central to begin with.  Further noting that Burns was shot after the program began, he quickly surmises that Smithers could not of shot Burns as Smithers had already returned to watch that program.  He quickly goes to the police station to inform them of this and Smithers then recalls that he did try to leave early, but still remembers shooting an old man: one by the name of Jasper, but no report of a second shooting was made.  The police look into this and find that Jasper was indeed shot - but in his wooden leg.  Smithers is relieved that he didn't kill anybody, and the investigation continues.

At the Simpsons place, as the family ponders how everyone in the family (except Marge I guess) could be the shooter, Lisa decides to get involved with the investigation.  Around this time, Grampa reveals that he dug up his gun from the yard, placing an awful lot of suspicion on him at the moment.  Meanwhile, as the police retrieve the bullet Burns was shot with and begin to determine motive, Lisa comes along with four possible suspects with motives: Moe and Barney who both lost Moe's bar, as well as Principal Skinner and Groundskeeper Willie who suffered big when Burns practically stole their oil.  The police also include Tito Puente who would have similar motive to Willie at least, much to Lisa's dismay, and its Tito Puente they first investigate.  After seeing that Puente's "revenge" was an angry mambo, the police clear him.  Skinner reveals that while he was planning on engaging Burns, a failed attempt at camoflauge delayed him and the shot occured while he (and Superintendant Chalmers) were in the bathroom.  Willie reveals that he couldn't of pulled the trigger as his crippling arthritis (from "Space Invaders") prevents him from handling a firearm.  Moe is also off the hook when a lie detector test clears him as well.

With just one lead left, Chief Wiggum falls asleep where a peculiar dream tells him to check the suit Burns got shot in.  Sure enough, in the suit there lays a single eyelash, and a DNA test will allow them to learn the genetic lineage of the eyelash: Simpson.  Just then, Burns wake up from the coma and blurts out "Homer Simpson", prompting the police to act.  They arrive at the Simpsons house and find a gun in Homer's car with his fingerprints on it (not the same gun Grampa has), which matches the bullet found in Burns.  Having everything they need, Wiggum arrests Homer for the attempted murder of Mr. Burns.

A fast food trip gone wrong allows Homer to escape custody, prompting a renewed Smithers to offer a reward for Homer dead or alive, while at the same time Lisa isn't convinced Homer did it, saying Homer's fingerprints could've gotten on the gun some other way (perhaps by accident), and that the eyelash could belong to any of the Simpsons.  Seeking one last desperate clue, Lisa visits the crime scene and looks at the sundial where Burns collapsed.  Seeing how his arms landed, Lisa realizes what happened.  Just then, its learned that Homer is at the hospital Burns is in.  As it turns out, "Homer Simpson" is all the tramatized Burns can say at the moment, and as Homer confronts Burns, he starts shaking him in an attempt to get Burns to stop naming him the murderer.  The attack snaps Burns out of it and he regains his ability to talk just as everyone arrives.  There, Burns reveals that Homer did not shoot him, and points out the real shooter in the crowd: Maggie Simpson!

As Burns explains, after the town meeting, he decides to celebrate, and sees Maggie alone in the car with the dog holding a lollipop (Marge having left to look for everyone else, who were unaccounted for).  Remembering the phrase "as easy as taking candy from a baby" from Part One, he decides to try it out now, but Maggie's grip is super strong (as Burns probably should've remembered).  Just then, the gun Burns had equipped himself with falls out of his holster, and lands on Maggie's lap.  A shot is fired, and Burns is hit.  The gun then falls under the seat.  As nobody outside of maybe Texas would convict a baby, the case is settled and everything seems to of returned to status quo rather quickly.

Quick Review
Despite how ludicrously plausible that ending was, this ended up being a strong conclusion and an excellent start to the new season.  The progress of Wiggum's incompetent yet efficient investigation was full of great laughs, the bit with Smithers worked well enough, and though the ending was a little weak the episode was still very excellent.

Final Score: 9.7

Old Money (S02, E17-030)

Bea is a ghost at this point, so the people only see a wailing old man.

Plot Summary
After yet another dull third Sunday of the month with the family, Abraham J. Simpson, known up to this point simply as "Grampa" Simpson, meets a wonderful old woman whose pills are mixed up with his.  The woman, Bea, and Abe become a quick couple and have probably the best month they've had in a long time.  Bea's birthday is coming up, and Grampa gets a gift and is ready to go.  Unfortunately, her birthday is on the third Sunday of the month.  Homer and the family, realizing they need to spend better quality time with Grampa, decide to go to a fake African safari.  Homer forces Grampa to go along after believe Bea to be a figment of the old man's imagination.  The fake safari becomes a mess after Homer takes a wrong turn and winds up in the middle of a lions den.  They aren't rescued until the next morning, and after Grampa rushes back, he finds out that Bea died, as Grampa surmises, of a broken heart.

With what had happened, Grampa refuses to talk to Homer.  It is soon learned, though, that Bea was somewhat wealthy, and she gives Abe $106,000 to spend however he pleases.  Abe tries his best to do all sorts of fun stuff with the money, but it just isn't working.  Bea's ghost appears while Abe is riding a rollercoaster and instead advises Abe to use that money to make other people happy.

Abe asks townspeople how they would use the money to determine if they deserve it or not, but nobody is really making a good case.  Lisa suggests Grampa use the money to help the poor and needy, but given the state of that, a hundred thousand dollars isn't nearly enough to cover that, so he decides to gamble it and make more.  Homer catches wind of this and is able to stop Grampa before he gambles it all away.  Finally, Abe decides to use the money to improve the otherwise run down retirement home, naming a dining room after Bea.

Quick Review
This is a touching episode, moreso than it is a funny episode.  It mainly features Grampa Simpson in what's the first episode focused on him, and as it avoids many of his character's stereotypes (feeble, his family ignores him, helpless), it also takes him on an emotional rollercoaster that involves a woman he falls in love with, her money, and his son whose entangled in the whole mess.

As such, this isn't so much a funny episode as it is an emotional episode.  It gets some high marks for that.  Otherwise, its not a hilarious episode, but its still worth a watch for those of you who like Grampa Simpson beyond what most episodes portray him as.

Final Score: 7.8