Much Apu About Something (S27, E12-586)

Addicted to scratch-off tickets is bad enough.  Addicted
to Big Bang Theory tickets is irredeemable, honestly.

Note: not to be confused with the Season 7 episode Much Apu About Nothing.

Plot Summary
Mayor Quimby attempts to make Springfield a tourist attraction by replacing the old Jebediah Springfield statue with something more interactive.  A parade is held for the new statue, which turns out to be a total dud, but during the parade Bart instigates a feud between the police and the volunteer firefighters which results in the police's new heavily armored vehicle to crash into the Kwik-E-Mart, injuring Apu and his brother Sanjay.  For his part, Bart's misdeed was both seen and caught on camera by Homer, who makes a deal to Bart not to turn him in as long as he stops pranking altogether.

In the hospital, Sanjay admits to Apu that he no longer cares to operate the Kwik-E-Mart anymore and has decided to give the business up to his son, Jamshed who had agreed to rebuild the store.  Six weeks later, Apu sees to his horror that Jamshed, who goes by "Jay" now, has rebuilt the Kwik-E-Mart into "Quick & Fresh", a modern store which sells only organic food.  Its revealed that Apu became addicted to scratch-off ticket playing after winning $25 on his first try, but in order to fund his habit Apu gave up more and more of his share of the store's ownership to then Sanjay, allowing Jay to have majority ownership of the new store.  The two constantly argue, with Jay somewhat offended by Apu being an Indian stereotype, and Apu offended that Jay is acting like a complete hipster millennial stereotype.  Ultimately, Jay fires Apu from the store.

Meanwhile, Bart holds up his word and refuses to prank despite Milhouse's attempts otherwise.  Bart starts becoming a good student overall, but as Homer doesn't care about that, Lisa connects with Bart now that they've both been shunned.

Wallowing away in his sorrows, Apu goes to Moe's to sulk, but the gang there gets the idea of having Bart pull a prank on Jay as part of a plan to get Apu his store back.  Homer is reluctant at first, liking Bart as he is now, but Apu's friendship with everyone is too much to ignore so Homer agrees to have Bart pull the prank.  Homer again is reluctant when he sees Bart being good, but when Bart begins to try to negotiate the terms of the prank, Homer realizes Bart has turned once more.

Bart's prank is rather simple: pull the plug on the store's power for a little bit, and since everything in the store is organic, the lack of conditioning would force the food to immediately go bad because that's a thing that can happen.  Despite Lisa's last second plea to stop Bart, Bart goes ahead and turns off the store's power and sure enough everything in the store rots.  Bart turns the power back on, but that causes an accident in the store that sets it aflame.  Apu goes to console Jay over his failure, but notices one scratch off ticket survived the fire as well as a single penny.  To his luck, the ticket wins Apu a million dollars, enough for him to rebuild and fully own a new Kwik-E-Mart just like his old one.  As thanks to Homer, Apu presents him a golden Squishee cup with free and infinite refills that will only cost him $3 in the long run.

In the episode's conclusion, Quimby orders the police to destroy the failed new Jebediah statue, but the police only end up destroying their new armored vehicle instead.

Quick Review
After a string of disastrous episodes, this one gets the show back on track.  Jay was not a good character, I don't know if "buzzword-spouting hipster millennials" like Jay actually exist, I tend to think that's not the case but I may just be naive.  In any case, Jay basically brought the episode down single-handedly.  The scenes with Apu himself were good, the parade has its moments and Bart's subplot was overall fine, but the episode suffered every time Jay spoke.

Final Score: 7.3

Sky Police (S26, E16-568)

In the next episode, Chief Wiggum learns about helicopters.

Plot Summary
By mistake, Chief Wiggum is sent a jetpack intended for one Clancy Wiggins.  Regardless, Wiggum happily claims the jetpack and hoards it to himself, becoming an airborne sentry, "Sky Police" as it were.  After some time, though, Wiggins - a military chief - comes in to claim his jetpack and bust Clancy Wiggum for basically stealing it.  Wiggum attempts to fly away but overuse of the jetpack, combined with military gunfire, causes the jetpack to malfunction.  As Wiggum detaches itself, the jetpack goes haywire, eventually crashing into the church, causing great damages.

With the church's act-of-god system preventing them from getting any insurance benefits, the church is left with no money to fix itself.  The six-person committee of Reverend Lovejoy, his wife Helen, Sideshow Mel, Agnes Skinner, Ned Flanders and Marge Simpson gets help, however, from an unlikely source: Apu - who needs the church up to teach people not to steal or kill (him).  He tells the group to go to the casino to get the funds using the ages-old trick of card counting - specifically keeping track of the cards in a deck and if a deck has a high enough set of cards remaining, send in someone with a big pot of money to reap the benefits.  The six do so wonderfully on the first night - in part because the group advises Marge to not tell Homer as he's prone to screw these things up.

The casino is on to the group after the first night, so Apu advises the group to don disguises for night two.  Bart and Lisa catch Marge in disguise before she leaves; she tells the two what's going on and has them promise not to tell Homer.  The second night goes wonderfully as well, and the church now has enough money for repairs.  However, Marge is stunned later to find that Homer has been taken in by the casino, who demands their money back less Homer wind up in a more battered shape.

Marge learns that the kids, worried that Marge was still out late, told Homer out of concern, and Homer rushes blindly into the casino asking about Marge - whom the casino was suspicious of - and nabs him as a hostage.  Marge tries to get Reverend Lovejoy to get the money back, but he's already used it to fix up the casino.  Realizing how dirty the church has become through the group's acts, Marge decides to go back to the basics with her faith to save Homer - by praying at the casino.  Stunned by the sight, casino-goers gawk at Marge's praying, causing casino profits to plummet.  The casino subsequently agrees to give Homer up as long as Marge agrees that her and her group never step foot in a casino again.  The incident causes Marge to think about her faith for a moment, but Homer reassures her its fine.

Quick Review
Despite the title, the sky police portion only makes up the opening gag and a credits gag.  Part of me wishes the sky police gag lasted longer, but it's probably for the best that it didn't.

The majority of the episode is focused on the card-counting story.  I must say, though, its a pretty decent episode.  Apu seemed like his old self at long last, despite the odd change to his past, and the episode didn't go off the deep end with religion until the very end when it couldn't do much to hurt the episode.

Final Score: 7.5

Covercraft (S26, E08-560)

Sideshow Mel's family, nothing more than a quick gag.  Sure was worth the wait.

Plot Summary
A dispute between Moe and the owner of the next door music shop ends with both of them going to jail and their businesses closed down.  This forces Lisa to go to the "big corporation" music store for her needs.  Homer takes her there and quickly becomes the target of opportunistic salesmen.  They get him playing the bass guitar and as Homer finds that he's actually good at it, the salesman sell him that plus tons of accessories, the combinations of which cause low-pitched chaos at home.  Marge complains about this to her circle of friends, who then admit they have similar problems with their husbands.  Marge then realizes that the husbands can form their own band, and thus only bother one wife at a time.

The husband crew consists of Homer at bass, Kirk van Houten at piano, Dr. Hibbert at drums, and Reverend Lovejoy at guitar.  After learning they all have the same taste in music, the four quickly gel and jam.  Soon after that, Apu arrives to be the group's singer, and reveals that, due to his time at the Kwik-E-Mart, he has developed the voice of the lead singer from the group Sungazer to maintain his sanity listening to the group's songs nonstop at the store.  With this voice added in, the group decides to become a cover band, dedicated to their craft, thus the name Covercraft.  The group gets a gig at the Springfield Cabbage Festival, but Apu is nervous.  Homer convinces Apu to believe that he's at the Kwik-E-Mart with nobody around, handing Apu his work uniform to help with the setting, and with that mindset Apu helps Covercraft become a popular cover band in Springfield.

Soon, Sungazer - whose lead singer passed away - decides to make Apu their singer for their tour, and Apu gleefully accepts.  Homer becomes envious of Apu's supposed success, and out of panic disbands the remains of Covercraft.  Still, Apu sends the Simpson family tickets and backstage passes to Sungazer's concert in Springfield.  Homer 'realizes' that Apu couldn't of gotten this far without Homer's advice and goes backstage to steal back Apu's uniform.  Forced to hide, Homer witnesses Sungazer treating Apu like crap thanks to a harsh contract Apu signed.  Realizing Apu does not, in fact, have it good, Homer drops his anger and helps Apu enact a little revenge of his own by ordering in a buffet of Kwik-E-Mart quality hot dogs for Sungazer.  They quickly become ill, and Apu takes the opportunity to have Covercraft perform the concert instead.  The police figure out the hot dog scheme, though, and Apu and Homer are arrested in due time.

Quick Review
This episode was pretty boring, I felt.  Not a lot of jokes, but not a lot of "bad" things either.  The focus was clearly on music, and the few attempts at comedy (the opening bit with Moe and the music shop owner, for instance), had a few misses that held the episode back.

Final Score: 6.0

Character Spotlight: Apu Nahasapeemapetilon

Note: This was written before the start of Season 26; any new information regarding Apu from Season 26 on is not covered here.

Character: Apu Nahasapeemapetilon

First Episode: The Telltale Head (S01, E08-008)

Occupation: The man in charge of Springfield's Kwik-E-Mart store.

General Demeanor
In earlier years, Apu was mainly known as the shrewd operator of the Kwik-E-Mart, often overcharging for nearly everything he sells and having to deal with the constant robberies by local criminal Snake Jailbird.  In earlier years, Apu is paired with his brother Sanjay, but Sanjay is never seen in newer episodes.  Apu is an Indian immigrant, possessing a notable Indian accent and is an open and devout follower of Hinduism.  Apu is generally kind and courteous to his customers, and its that friendliness that makes him the center of attention in many episodes focused on him.

In the early episodes, Apu is a bachelor, perfectly content working at his store though in rare instances he is with a date of some sort.  After Apu gets married, and especially after he has eight children, Apu's character in the show changes.  While his role in the Kwik-E-Mart is still there, most of the 'comedy' surrounding Apu now focuses on his exhausting personal life with his strict wife and demanding children.  Children, by the way, who have grown from babies into toddlers while Maggie remains the same age.

Key Character Moments
The Rise of the Simpsons
Apu doesn't have any notable episodes, mainly a side character, though in the Season 1 episode Krusty Gets Busted its Apu that gets robbed by the supposed Krusty, setting up many "Apu gets robbed" jokes for the future.

The Golden Age of the Simpsons
Apu's faith is noted heavily in Season 4's Homer the Heretic, as Homer mocks Apu's Ganesha statue, but is remorseful when Apu leads a volunteer firefighter group - full of people with different religious faiths - to save Homer's house.

Season 5's Homer's Barbershop Quartet sees Apu as a member of the Be Sharps - a barbershop group - alongside Homer, Seymour Skinner and (eventually) Barney.  Apu's biggest episode comes later in the season, in Homer and Apu, where Apu's shady cleanliness practices leaves Homer sick and Apu out of a job.  Realizing that he needs the Kwik-E-Mart, Apu makes amends with Homer and eventually saves his replacement at the store - James Woods - to regain his job.

Season 7's Lisa the Vegetarian reveals that Apu, too, is vegetarian but teaches Lisa a valuable lesson: don't be a preachy jerk even if your cause is just.  Later in the season, Apu joins Homer, Moe and Otto to form a bowling team that feeds on team encouragement for success.

Much of Apu's history is revealed in Much Apu About Nothing, where Apu reveals he is an illegal immigrant, who came to America as one of India's top students but ended up loving his job at the Kwik-E-Mart and stayed.  With bear-hysteria ultimately being blamed on illegal immigrants, a vote to ban illegal immigrants is coming up.  With the Simpsons' help, Apu is able to earn his citizenship just in time and Apu gets to enjoy the benefits of being an American citizen, such as ignoring jury duty.

The Fall of the Simpsons
Season 9's The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons is one of two episodes to change Apu's character forever.  In this episode, Apu finally embraces bachelorhood, only to find out his mother is forcing him to undergo his arranged marriage.  Despite a clumsy attempt by him and Homer to stop it, Apu's mother eventually sets up the marriage - in the Simpsons' backyard, no less.  Apu warms up to the idea only upon meeting his arranged wife, Manjula after many years, and decides to give the marriage a shot.

I'm with Cupid, in Season 10, is one of two episodes where Apu's marriage hits a bump.  Apu is in the doghouse when Manjula believes Apu heavily prioritizes work over her, and to make it up Apu gives Manjula several days worth of publicly known apology gifts, putting most of Springfield's husbands in the doghouse themselves for not matching Apu's extravagant efforts.  Regardless, Apu's plan works and the two reconcile.

Season 11's Eight Misbehavin' is the second of two episodes to change Apu's character forever.  Here, he and Manjula want to have a baby, but have trouble conceiving one.  With the Simpsons' help, they use multiple contraceptives to help the effort, but they help a little too well, as Manjula gives birth to eight children.  With the episode getting a little too zany from there, let it be known that from this point own, Apu's soul is now owned by those eight little devils.

Zombie Simpsons
Season 13's The Sweetest Apu is the second of two episodes where Apu's marriage hits a bump.  Unlike the last time, though, this one sees Apu is much more serious trouble as he's seen cheating on Manjula with the Squishee girl.  Manjula is close to divorcing Apu, but after dealing with shady lawyers and her kids who have been coached to get her to forgive Apu, she takes him back but only after he's forced to go through several painful, embarrassing acts.

Season 18's Crook and Ladder sees Apu as a volunteer firefighter again, alongside Skinner, Homer and Moe, the latter of which encourages the others to thrift items "lost in fires".  Only Moe and Apu still do so by the episode's end as Apu is mostly an afterthought compared to the other three for the plot.

Zombie Simpsons HD
Season 21's Moe Letter Blues forces Apu, Homer, and Reverend Lovejoy to reconsider how they treat their wives when Moe somehow trolls them into thinking he's swooning one of them over to him.

Season 23's Exit Through the Kwik-E-Mart sees a slight return to classic Apu when his store's business is hurt badly by a new superstore that outclasses his in nearly every fashion.  In an ironic twist, the new store hires a reformed Snake Jailbird, who in turn gets mugged by a desperate Apu.  Apu and his store is only saved when it turns out the new store used monkey meat instead of chicken.  Apu hasn't had much of a role in the series since.

Must Watch Episodes That Focus on Apu
Homer's Barbershop Quartet
Homer and Apu
Much Apu About Nothing
The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons

Exit Through the Kwik-E-Mart (S23, E15-501)

The question mark really makes it a thinker.

Plot Summary
Homer, for once, is ready for Marge's birthday.  He's getting her a food processor she likes, which is endorsed by a cook she likes, and Homer is going to a new grocery store nearby where the cook will be singing stuff so he can have the cook sign Homer's present to Marge.  While at the new store, Homer meets the cook who tells Homer she'll call Marge during her live show as an added birthday bonus.

Meanwhile, Apu is there checking to see just how many people are going to this seemingly reasonable store rather than the cesspool that is the Kwik-E-Mart, and after learning most of them are okay with leaving Apu's business, he goes nuts.  At a later point, the store hires a seemingly reformed Snake, who in an ironic twist, hyuck, gets held up by Apu desperate for cash, though the experienced Snake calms Apu down.  Calmed yet defeated, Apu begins to close down his store when Manjula gives him good news: the new store is forced to shut down after its learned it was replacing chicken products with monkey meat.  Apu's business is saved and he can go back to lamenting his family.

Back to Marge's birthday, its going pretty swell.  Bart gets her a live rabbit not unlike one she had as a little girl, but Homer is thrilled to finally be ready for a birthday for once.  Homer readies for the phone call from the cook, but it never arrives.  Several hours later, Homer in frustration reveals his now ruined plan, but upon trying to angrily call the cook, he finds the phone isn't working.  Slowly, the family learns that the new rabbit ate the phone's wires just before the call was supposed to take place, and that the cook had actually called Marge several times, eventually getting so angry over supposedly being shunned she openly mocks Marge on her show.  Marge's birthday is once again ruined, and Homer pins the blame on Bart for bringing in the rabbit in the first place, shoving him into the rabbit's cage as punishment, then forcing him out when Bart enjoys himself in there.

Bart particularly doesn't like how Homer treats him here, and decides to get back at him by displaying graffiti across town with part of Homer's face with the word 'dope' underneath it.  With Milhouse his willing lacking, Bart litters the entire town with hundreds of dope tags, nearly swallowing the entire city.  The next day, Homer is unaware he's the target of the graffiti, and on TV Chief Wiggum basically taunts the vandalizer to do something even bigger.  Bart decides to do just that, but in the process he and Milhouse are confronted by four adults who reveal themselves to be "street artists", led by Shepard Fairey, an actual guy.  They convince Bart that his work is real art and that he should display it in a museum.  Bart agrees to do so, but later Milhouse's bumbling leads to Homer finally figuring out who the man in the dope graffiti is: him.

Homer can't even muster the anger to strangle Bart, simply saddened that Bart views him the way he does.  On the night of the museum unveiling, a remorseful Bart sprays Homer's car, increasing its value, and Homer makes up with his son.  However, the museum display was actually a police trap, set up by Wiggum with help from Fairey, who works with the police because he's a sellout or something, I dunno.  Marge convinces Wiggum not to arrest Bart, but Wiggum still needs to punish Bart for the act, when Homer comes up with a perfect solution: putting Bart back into the rabbit cage where he can sign autographs for his show even though its technically phony.

Quick Review
Season 23 finally has a solid episode, and that's despite the fact that there were two things working against it: the Game of Thrones couch gag that I really couldn't care less about, and the inclusion of the "street artists" whose appearances did little to improve the lackluster main plot with Bart.

However, I was happy to finally see Apu do something funny again.  Its been so long, it seems, since Apu has been involved in any Kwik-E-Mart related shenanigans, as nearly every joke involving him during the past several years has involved his less than pleasant wife and kids, and I mean 'less than pleasant' from both his point of view as well as a comedic one.  In this episode, Apu going nuts over the new store and his attempt to mug Snake were the episode's highlights and I wish the episode focused more on it than the lame graffiti storyline especially since the episode is titled after it.  Combined with some good stuff from Homer, and it is one of the season's best episodes, which is relatively not that great still.

Final Score: 7.1

Moe Letter Blues (S21, E21-462)

This story's biggest failing is the assumption Moe can actually talk to women.

Plot Summary
As narrated by Moe, he notices many married couples going through rough patches, including the Lovejoys, the Nahasapeemapetilons and, of course, the Simpsons.  Its the day before mothers day, and the family sees on a commercial an amusement park on an island to give mothers a break from her kids for the day.  Marge insists Homer take the kids while displaying no enthusiasm towards dealing with Homer's usual tomfoolery.  The next day, Homer, Reverend Lovejoy and Apu take their respective kids to the boat leading toward the island, when the three of them are given a letter at the last second from Moe.  It states that Moe plans on leaving town forever, and that he's leaving with one of their wives.  With the three unable to turn the boat around, they're stuck all day on the island trying to figure out whose wife it is.

Homer recalls a short time ago when Marge hosted a birthday party for her mother, but Homer ruins it for Marge by getting into another fight with Patty and Selma.  Moe was working there as a drink provider, so the theory is that Moe got to Marge after that party.  However, Apu remembers when his family went to Moe's to dry up from the rain, but after leaving a bickering Apu and Manjula realize they forgot a kid back at Moe's.  Manjula goes back by herself, and Homer was at the bar when Moe entertains Manjula and her left behind kid (before Marge took him home for her mother's party), so now its likely Manjula is the departing wife.  Homer and Apu then make Tim remember the Sunday after Marge's party, where the Parson helps the pastor realize that his relationship with Helen isn't as cheery as he had thought.  Inside the church, Moe and Helen get to talking, and outside Apu noticed Helen put her hand on Moe's knee.  So, in the end, none of three can figure out whose wife is being taken.

Finally, the day is at an end, and the husbands get to confirm whether its them or not.  Homer is the first to go, and sees Marge packing from a distance, but soon learns Marge was actually putting away painting supplies as she had been painting in front of her mother for the day.  Her mother helped Marge realize the fault of that fight wasn't Homer's, but Patty and Selma's and Homer and Marge make up, which Lovejoy and Apu can plainly see.  Next up is the Reverend, who upon returning to his room sees that Helen has packed up, telling Tim she's leaving... with him to Istanbul on the world's most romantic train.  Apu sees Tim and Helen kissing and realizes he must be the loser in this game, and upon returning to his apartment he sees Manjula and Moe sitting together.  However, Manjula states she wants to stay with Apu.  Moe then reveals to Apu, and later all three, that he noticed the three wives feeling down following their separate encounters, so he got in contact with Marge's mom to talk to Marge, convinced Helen to take the train to Istanbul with Tim, and then talked things over with Manjula.  Moe wrote the letter to the three of them to help them realize they hadn't been treating their wives right, as there's no better judge of that than an ugly, creepy, perverted, lonely bartender!  Still, Moe's plan worked out for the best.

Quick Review
This episode ended up being okay.  The plot was decently clever if not a little lacking in the humor department, but Moe provided a level of comic relief that kept the episode afloat.

Final Score: 7.0

Crook and Ladder (S18, E19-397)

Don't mess around with these guys, they will tear you apart.

Plot Summary
Marge takes advice from a Larry Flint-owned baby magazine to get Maggie to stop sucking on a pacifier.  This backfires, as Maggie goes on a destructive tear throughout the house.  With Maggie's brand of pacifier out of stock, the family starts to go nuts over her, until the dog saves the day and gives her a chew toy to suck on.  Her loud sucking on the toy, though, leaves Homer awake late at night.  He goes to watch TV when he sees a commercial for Nappien, a sleeping aid.  Homer quickly acquires some, and gets some sleep, but then finds out the the Nappien makes Homer sleep walk and do all sorts of crap while he's unconscious.  While Homer tries to remedy this by locking his door, Bart realizes the implications of having a suggestive zombie father, and lets him free to mess with during the night.  As Bart and Milhouse have zombie Homer drive them around, Homer wakes up and, in a panic, drives into a fire station, where after a series of accidents, the entire corp of firefighters are left injured and unable to do their job.

A call goes out for volunteers to fire fight.  Homer decides to join to make up for what he did.  Alongside him are Principal Skinner, Apu, and Moe, who is made the new fire chief.  After a short time of waiting, the four are tasked with saving Luigi's restaurant.  They do so, and as a reward, Luigi lets them have some of his food for free.  The four realize that their heroics earn them a little compensation for their volunteer work, and this holds true for the next few instances they receive a call for help.  However, when the four go and put out a large fire at Burns' mansion, Mr. Burns thanks them without any physical reward.  Upset, Moe decides to use a flimsy line of reasoning to justify taking some of Burns' loot.  The group does so again at Costington's, but Skinner begins to regret what's going on and, after being unable to convince the others to stop, decides to simply look away.  Things complicate further and Marge and the kids rush to see Homer put out a fire, only to arrive just in time to see him, Apu and Moe enjoy the rush of theft.

Marge confronts Homer about the thievery, using the kids as a guilt trip to get Homer to finally relent.  During the next fire, Homer talks to Moe about what's been going on, but in his greed, Moe traps himself.  Homer rescues him as well as a fallen Apu and is heralded as a hero.  Homer tells his kids this story later on, concluding that the four took the stuff they stole and donated it to the homeless.

Quick Review
This was a fun episode for the most part, though the first half of the episode is kind of everywhere before it finally settles on the firefighter story for the second half.  It was also sort of odd how the episode tries to set up Skinner as the moral high ground for a minute before that whole idea dissolves and its up to Marge and the kids to provide that role.  In fact, after Skinner decides to simply look the other way, he has very little to do with the rest of the episode.  That was odd.  Still, despite that, this turns out be a fairly decent episode.

Final Score: 7.5

The Sweetest Apu (S13, E19-288)

Now, see, if a guy tried this, it would be seen as creepy and/or sick.
Gotta admit though, that is pretty hot.

Plot Summary
At the Kwik-E-Mart, Apu is exhausted after Manjula brings the octuplets to the store.  The kids, plus a wife that isn't putting out, and Apu isn't feeling the best.  After they leave and Apu cleans the mess, Homer comes in to rent a beer keg for a civil war reenactment that's about to start.  About this time, the "squishee lady", Annette, comes in to refill the squishee machine, and Homer and Apu note that she may like him despite his current marital status.  After a rather inaccurate reenactment, Homer returns the now busted keg in hopes that he can get his money back.  He doesn't see Apu, but he hears giggling in a side room.  Curious, Homer takes a peek, and finds Apu makin' squishees with Annette, if you understand what I'm saying.

Homer backs away, all the way back home where Marge quickly figures out that Apu is having an affair.  Marge is particularly distraught over this, having hosted Apu and Manjula's wedding, and she and Homer decide to try and help Apu before Manjula finds out.  Homer (eventually) confronts Apu over what he saw, and Apu does feel shame over it and agrees to break up with the Annette.  However, Annette comes on to him again, and the two presumable have fun once more.  Manjula starts to catch on that something is amiss, and is able to grab security footage from the Kwik-E-Mart which shows Apu in the middle of his adultery.  Angered, she kicks Apu out.  Homer and Marge try one desperate ploy to get the two back together, but it doesn't work, and Manjula decides to file for divorce.

Manjula still has some feelings for Apu, and with the divorce lawyer she visits acting rather devilishly, she decides to hold off on divorce for now.  Marge is able to get each of the octuplets to ask for Manjula to get back with Apu, and she finally relents although she still wants Apu to suffer.  Marge comes up with an idea: create a list of rather off-the-wall tasks for Apu to complete that, once finished, will allow Apu to come back.  The tasks, which include breaking up with Annette as well as doing a rendition of My Fair Lady with the octuplets, are all eventually completed and the two reconcile with Homer watching rather creepily (again).

Quick Review
This wasn't that great of an episode.  In the now four episodes where she has had some focus, Manjula has yet to develop any sort of character quirk that would make her a funny, worthwhile character, and "Apu's arranged wife who gave birth to eight kids at once" isn't a funny character quirk.  In fact, I'd even say that her presence has limited Apu's comedic potential.  It sounds weird, I know, but really, just compare the episodes focused on just Apu with the ones that include Manjula: usually the solo-Apu episodes are much better.

There's a few other things I didn't like which kept this episode's score down.  Homer constantly backpedaling home was an okay gag, if a bit stretched out, but for him to peek into Apu and Manjula's home late at night on a ladder, and then after seeing them get it on start to hop backwards while on said ladder, well that's just stupid.  The collar-pulling gag is one of my least favorite gags and it makes several consecutive appearances in this episode as well.  Ignoring all of that, there are several jokes that do work, but it gets vastly overshadowed by everything that went wrong.

Final Score: 6.4

Sweets and Sour Marge (S13, E08-277)

We've past the point where visual gags remain part of an episode's plot.  Great.

Plot Summary
At the library, Homer's apathy towards books is lessened when Marge shows his the Duff Book of World Records.  The oddities found within grab Homer's attention, to the point where he wants to attempt to get a record himself.  However, all of the individual records are out of reach for Homer, so he decides to get a group record, settling on having the town get the record for world's largest human pyramid.  He's successfully able to get the town to take part, and they're one second away from maintaining it long enough to get the record, but a literal slip of the hand causes the pyramid to fall apart, and somehow everyone gets bundled up into a massive ball and sent rolling down a hill.  They finally settle ontop a truck scale, where the scale weights them to be 64,152 lbs.  Averaging it all out, Springfield sets the record for the world's fattest town.

Its an accomplishment nearly the entire town enjoys, but Marge is dismayed over it.  She ponders how everyone could be so obese, and observes that there's sugar everywhere.  The Kwik-E-Mart doesn't even offer a product lacking sugar.  Marge sees that the Kwik-E-Mart's sugary products are made by the Motherloving Sugar company, whose worldwide HQ is right nearby!  Marge goes there to complain to the CEO, whose last name is also Motherloving, but little is accomplished.  Upset, Marge decides to file a class-action lawsuit against the company over the claim that its sugar is harmful to others, getting enough signatures around town to do so.  She gets additional help from Professor Frink, a former worker at the sugar company, who admits that they knew sugar was addictive and made candy from it from that fact alone.  With enough detriment against sugar, and a failed bribe as well, Judge Snyder rules in favor of Marge, then goes and banishes sugar and sugar-related products from Springfield.

"Marge's law", as its now known, devastates the town, leaving kids unable to function and store shelves bare.  Still, Marge is happy the law is passed.  Homer can't take it, though, even willing to lick at any sticky spot that's on the ground.  Apu notices Homer's desperation, and takes him to a secret meeting featuring Mr. Burns and others, and they decide to smuggle in some sugar from an island nearby.  They do so, getting huge quantities of sugar on a large boat, but the police catch on to them.  As Burns and the others make a quick escape on a lifeboat, Homer takes the sugar boat and is able to evade the police.  He goes to a dock to deliver the sugar to Motherloving, but Marge catches Homer and is able to convince him to dump the sugar into whatever body of water the boat is in.  People catch wind of this and quickly dive into the water to enjoy their sweet, sweet sugar.  Judge Snyder admits he abused his power and repeals Marge's law, and though Marge is saddened that her nagging once again led nowhere, Homer still likes that quality about Marge.

Quick Review
I don't really have much to say about this episode.  Some jokes were funny, some jokes weren't.  The overall plot was substandard that had some potential near the beginning that never worked out.  It wasn't that great of an episode.

Final Score: 6.4

Eight Misbehavin' (S11, E07-233)

"Help, I need tungsten to live.  Tuuunnnnngsteeeenn..."

Plot Summary
The Simpsons go to a Ikea-like superstore, where they come across Apu and his wife Manjula.  The two spend a little time with Maggie, and come to decide that it's time for them to have a baby of their own.  Initial efforts to conceive a child prove fruitless, but Apu enlists Homer's help and eventually Manjula becomes pregnant.  Nine months later, Apu meets his first-born child - and then the other seven as Manjula has given birth to octuplets as Apu, Manjula and members of the Simpson family gave Manjula fertility drugs nine months ago.

The couple are initially thrilled with the babies, as is the local media, and companies are giving them free gifts for the miracle.  However, news turns up that a Shelbyville couple has given birth to nine babies, and suddenly all the media attention and free gifts are redirected to the nonuplets of Shelbyville, leaving Apu and Manjula with nothing.

Raising eight babies becomes overwhelming for the two, when a man comes over to talk to Apu.  The man, Larry Kidkill, offers the chance for Apu's babies to be raised at the zoo complete with nursing and care, with the only 'catch' being that the public are allowed to watch them as well.  With Butch Patrick around to help convince them, Apu and eventually Manjula agree to the terms.  Later, though, they learn that the babies are also contractually obligated to be part of an extravagant show, a detail that the parents overlooked but neither are pleased with.  They try to confront Kidkill, but are shown off the premises.

Apu again enlists Homer's help and the two sneak in at night and grab the eight babies.  They flee back to the Simpson place, but Kidkill finds them and demands their return.  Homer instead convinces Kidkill to let the babies go by having him be part of a new show, where he and Butch Patrick fend off venomous snakes (or robot snakes filled with venom).  Seeing Homer's trials, Apu and Manjula realize that raising eight babies can't be all that difficult.

Quick Review
This was an okay episode, for the most part.  It had its moments and a few jokes were pretty good.  Throughout the episode, though, I found it odd that the Simpson family kept being involved in Apu's affairs.  He gets Homer to help him conceive a baby, the Simpsons are there during the birth for some reason, they go see the baby show at the zoo, and them Homer helps Apu out at the end.  It seems like this Apu-centric story had the Simpson family kinda, I dunno, shoehorned into it, and it didn't really seem... natural, I guess?  Is that the word I'm looking for?  Probably not, but it still bugged me.

Final Score: 7.4

I'm With Cupid (S10, E14-217)

Its very clearly a star yet nobody recognizes it as such.

Plot Summary
Marge goes out to the Kwik-E-Mart late to build Bart's project (which Nelson ruins later on), and checks up on Apu's relationship with his new wife, Manjula, but Apu only mentions that she understands that Apu has to work at the Kwik-E-Mart nearly non-stop, though Apu does invite Marge and Homer over to his apartment for dinner.  At that dinner, Marge blurts out that, no, most American men do not work every day like Apu and, no, nobody works for 18 hours a day like Apu.  Angered that Apu cares more about work than her, Manjula gets into an argument with Apu, forcing the two Simpsons to leave for the night.

The next day, Homer catches Apu at wit's end over his relationship with his wife, but realizes that its only a week away to Valentine's Day, and decides to go all out on rekindling his relationship with her.  He puts out a note, in public, that he will do an act of love for Manjula every day up to Valentine's Day.  The acts are indeed extravagant, from a carriage ride to Apu covering himself in chocolate, to a singing parrot informing Manjula that she's invited to go to an opera with Apu.  These acts of love make taken women across Springfield jealous, and even upset that their men are cheapskates.  The men across town, including Homer, have had enough of Apu's antics and in response decide to find a way to sabotage Apu's final act of love (rather than, you know, do romantic things for their women instead).

A strike team is created consisting of Homer, Moe, Dr. Hibbert, Chief Wiggum and Flanders, though Ned gets tossed out for being too reasonable.  The remaining four tail Apu to the airport where they find Elton John.  Mistaking that he's part of Apu's act, they trick him into going in a cage, but then they learn that Apu's real plan is to have a skywriter take a plane to draw out the phrase "I ♥ U MANJULA".  Homer is able to get in the plane just as it take off, and he and the skywriter get into a fight.  The fight causes the spray can to explode, instead creating the phrae "I ♥ U *", with the five pronged star somehow being interpreted across town by women as a message meant for them, though Marge can't make the star out to be anything.  The fight continues, the plane descending at a rose garden where Homer is swarmed with prickly roses.  The plane flies low over the Simpson backyard, and Homer is able to fall out, somehow grouping the roses into a bouquet and landing in a kneeling position despite barely being conscious.  Marge adores the supposed gesture of love, and is happy with Homer once again.  Though the skywriting plan fails, Apu is able to recruit Elton John to sing for Manjula as the Kwik-E-Mart is closed for the remainder of the day.

Quick Review
This was a good episode overall.  Elton John's appearance was well done, I felt.  There wasn't much comedy going on during Apu's acts of love so the episode's score is hurt from that, but otherwise it was fine.

Final Score: 7.9

Simpson Tide (S09, E19-197)

Oh yeah, woo, down with capitalism, yeah!  Whooo!

Plot Summary
Homer is fired for yet another act of gross incompetence, his "its my first day" excuse failing to work.  Afterward, Homer sees an ad for the Naval Reserve.  Seeing a bunch of guys do nothing but drink beer and relax even during their one weekend of work a month, Homer decides its the life for him and enlists.  Barney decides to join too upon learning his friend Homer is going, Moe enlists after hearing his two best customers are going, and Apu enlists for the hell of it.  After a short period of boot camp, Homer becomes a member of the Naval Reserve.

Meanwhile, Milhouse somehow is able to start a trend by wearing an earring on his left ear.  Bart decides to go with the trend and gets one himself, but so does everyone else at school.  Further, Homer doesn't like Bart having an earring, and chides him for it.

Some time later, the Naval Reserve is going to have their annual war games.  Homer's previous 'experience' at the nuclear plant puts him into a nuclear submarine.  Just before he goes, Homer confiscates Bart's earring.

The captain of the submarine takes a liking to Homer and, perhaps because of ocean madness, makes Homer the 2nd in command.  The captain gets called out to clean out a torpedo tube, leaving Homer in charge temporarily.  Just then, the submarine is attacked by an enemy, forcing Homer to fire a torpedo at it.  However, the tube containing the captain is launched, leaving Homer in charge permanently.  The attack from the enemy leaves the sub without any navigation.  Homer attempts to take the sub home, but messes up a turn and somehow leads the sub into Russian waters.

Homer is branded a traitor for his actions, and Russia decides to out itself as still being the Soviet Union, creating nuclear panic.  Homer's sub is eventually found and attacked.  After Homer uses Bart's earring to plug a hole in the sub, he has the sub surface so he can face his attackers.  After using the "its my first day" excuse again, Homer is sent home for discipline.  However, as each member of the disciplinary committee is under investigation of their own, Homer is simply dishonorably discharged.  Homer thanks Bart for the earring, but now has to refuse a multitude of other requests from Bart.

Quick Review
This is a fairly good episode, having Homer sign up for something advertised as for the lazy and drunk, and the supposed return of the Soviet Union was good for a few chuckles as well.  The tiny subplot featuring Bart's earring that merged into the main plot wasn't much of a laugh, though, and though I can't recall whether this episode is the first instance of the series doing it, the dreaded collar-pulling gag makes an appearance, a gag that defines the Scully-era Simpsons rather painfully.

Final Score: 8.2

Lisa the Simpson (S09, E17-195)

Its like watching a bunch of bootleg Homer's together.

Plot Summary
Lisa becomes frustrated over a puzzle featured on the back of a box, more so because everyone else has figured it out.  Further, she forgets her locker combination as well as her agriculture project, so she's having a pretty bad couple of days, intellectually.  Grampa catches wind of Lisa's dilemma and doesn't think much of it as he presumes that she's beginning to undergo the effects of the "Simpson" gene, a defective gene that kicks in at about age 8 that turns all otherwise intelligent Simpsons into dopes.  It's happened to Grampa, Homer and Bart, and now the devastated Lisa is next.

In a subplot, old man Jasper freezes himself inside a fridge at the Kwik-E-Mart, with Apu not realizing the scheme until its too late.  Jasper wishes to see the future (and to have his pants changed depending on the trends of the time), and is still alive within.  Though Apu is initially dismayed over what's happened, he eventually turns the Kwik-E-Mart into a profitable freakshow, with Jasper the main attraction.  However, despite Apu's attempts otherwise, Jasper is able to thaw, his plan a technical success, and walks off to discover the 'future'.  Needing a new revenue stream, Apu turns the freak show into a Nude-E-Mart.

Meanwhile, Lisa realizes that there's no escaping her genes, and tries to accept the fact that she'll become 'a Simpson', but finds it too terrible to bear.  Instead, Lisa decides to use one final night to 'feed' her brain with culture.  That same night, she's able to get on TV for an 'editorial' as she lets off some steam.  At this point, the Simpson family understands what's going on with Lisa (especially as Grampa also lets them know about the Simpson gene).  Homer scoffs at the notion, and spends the night making calls.

The next morning, Lisa wakes up to find Homer, Bart, and every Simpson in the tri-city area.  Homer attempts to prove there's no such thing as the Simpson gene, but every Simpson he talks to is, in one way or another, a failure.  Lisa's hopes quickly fade, but Marge points out that Homer hasn't talked to a female Simpson yet.  Turns out, the few that are there have all become successful in their lines of high quality work.  One Simpson, a doctor, reveals that the Simpson gene is in fact real, but is on the Y-chromosome so it only affects male Simpsons.  Lisa is rejuvenated by the news, thanks Homer for cheering her up (and Bart is mostly unfazed by learning he's going to be a massive failure), and a short time later is able to figure out that puzzle she got stuck on earlier.

Quick Review
This episode, despite being in the latter half of Season 9, is the last episode to be run by Bill Oakley and Josh Weinstein, who ran the show for Seasons 7 and 8.  Its all Mike Scully from here on.

The episode itself was good, not among the best of the season, but it holds it own.  The Jasper subplot was wonderful but brief, and the main plot has its moments but nothing too spectacular.

Final Score: 8.7

The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons (S09, E07-185)

Staff: "Wow, someone sure likes his kidney mush!"
Homer: "Damn right!"

Plot Summary
At a bachelor auction, its learned that Springfield's bachelor pool is... pretty bad.  One notable exception is Apu, who eventually makes himself known.  After listing his credentials, five ladies pool $900 to each have a date with Apu.  As he's having these dates, he comes to enjoy the bachelor life, telling Homer some stories one day at the Kwik-E-Mart.  Just then, he gets a letter from his mother, which tells him that its time for his arranged marriage, one that was agreed upon when Apu was still a child (this was touched upon in Much Apu About Nothing, back in Season 7).  Unwilling to lose the bachelor life he just gained, he gets help from Homer and decides to call his mother to tell her that he already married.  With that out of the way, Apu goes back to enjoying himself.

Some time later, again with Homer hearing Apu's stories at the Kwik-E-Mart, Apu is stunned to find his mother coming out of a taxi.  Realizing that she here to see Apu's "wife", he desperately has Homer come up with a new plan.  Homer casually comes up with the idea to have Apu pretend Marge is his wife, and goes home to get things ready.  Of course, Homer forgets about it, and only tells Marge just seconds before Apu arrives with his mother.  Put on the spot, Marge reluctantly agrees to go along with the charade, barely able to fill the kids in on what's happening as well.

Needing a place to hide, Homer finds that Moe is going on a vacation so instead he goes to the retirement home to visit Grampa.  There, the staff confuse Homer with another, otherwise unaccounted for patient, and Homer is more than happy to play the part.  While having fun eating mush, riding in wheelchairs and getting others to do the most basic tasks for him, Homer is eventually busted when the actual patient returns, having previously escaped to go on a bender.  Homer returns home to Marge, but a bit too early as Apu's mother sees Homer and Marge in bed, forcing Apu to admit that he does not have a wife and that he really doesn't want to go through with the marriage.  His mother understands but still forces Apu to go through with it, having his bride Manjula flown in as soon as possible.

Perhaps to make up for playing a part in the ruse, the Simpsons host the wedding in their backyard.  Apu continues to dread the event, but his attitude starts to change when he actually sees Manjula, who is a very attractive young woman.  The two quickly get to know one another, and despite Homer's last second attempt to sabotage the wedding, the two become wed.

Quick Review
I'll say this to start: the entire scene regarding the wedding was hardly funny.  Homer, and to a lesser extent Moe try to add humor to the scene but it just wasn't working for me.  Most of it was either making sure they portrayed the Hindu ceremony correctly or it was Apu and Manjula trying to make the situation more humorous than it was, and it just wasn't happening.

What saves the episode is the rather short subplot when Homer hides out at the retirement home and sees just how babied the residents of said home truly are.  Without this portion of the episode, which one could argue was thrown in to fill time, I have a hard time seeing this as being a good episode.

Final Score: 8.0

Lisa's Sax (S09, E03-181)

Ah, the old pastime of laughing at the elderly.

Plot Summary
After Homer & Marge do the All in the Family opening, Homer and Bart are trying to watch a new documentary on Krusty when Lisa's saxophone practicing gets on Homer's nerves.  He sends Bart to get Lisa to knock it off, but the two have a confrontation, leading Lisa's saxophone being thrown out the window, subsequently run over by a car, a truck and Nelson.

As Lisa cries over her loss, she notes that she's had the saxophone for as long as she can remember.  Homer is astonished that Lisa doesn't remember getting her sax, and begins to tell the tale about how Lisa got her sax... by talking about Bart's first day of school five years ago (in 1990, which is weird because the episode aired in 1997), which was terrible for him.  Homer & Marge do another All in the Family bit, with Apu brought in to finish a rhyme.

Marge takes over the storytelling, though the story still focuses on Bart.  Struggling in school with a downer of a teacher, and having no friends or fun, Bart becomes depressed, and scarily so.  Homer and Marge seek advice from the school's counselor, bringing Lisa along because they have nowhere else to leave her.  As the counselor advices that Bart stop trying to be an individual, he notices Lisa complete a complex jigsaw puzzle.  After asking a couple of questions, the counselor tells the parents that Lisa is gifted, and that they should find some way to nurture that gift as soon as possible.  However, most things that allow said gifts to nurture cost a lot of money, and the Simpsons just do not have much at that time.  However, Homer had saved up $200 for an air conditioner, just in time for an intense heat wave, but Marge has him hold off on buying one until they can figure something out for Lisa.

A short time later, Bart, still depressed, realizes that he can make other people laugh with jokes and such.  Gathering a crowd, Bart makes a five-year old ass of himself, and as Principal Skinner tries to set Bart back on the right path, Bart tells Skinner to 'eat my shorts', thereby turning Bart into the rapscallion we're familiar with today.

Meanwhile, as Homer takes Lisa to buy an air condition, spying one for $200, Lisa points out a shop for musical instruments.  Learning that musical instruments can encourage a gifted child, he takes Lisa in.  Lisa becomes enamored with a saxophone, but it too costs $200.  Homer waffles between the sax and the air conditioner for a few moments, but decides to buy the sax.  In the present day, Marge reveals that they have money saved up in the air conditioner fund again which can buy Lisa a new sax.  Despite Homer's initial protests, he buys a new saxophone for Lisa anyway, and afterward he, Marge and Apu take a moment to laugh at Grampa's temporary blindness.  Good times.

Quick Review
Lisa's Sax is an exceptional episode.  Bart's kindergarten days were fun to watch, with the bullies all wearing such neat shirts, and the appearances of Apu and Grampa really enhanced the comedy as well.  It all combines to make one of the best episodes of the season.

Final Score: 10

Much Apu About Nothing (S07, E23-151)

"Say, lets take a relaxed attitude toward work and watch
the baseball match.  The Nye Mets are my favorite squadron."

Plot Summary
"A large, bear-like animal, most likely a bear, has wandered down from the hills in search of food, or perhaps employment."  Kent Brockman states to start the episode.  The bear is quickly tranquilized, however Homer starts up a bear panic with the neighborhood and an angry mob confronts Mayor Quimby over it.  Quimby vows to stop any and all bear intrusions from now on much to the joy of the mob.  Soon, high tech bear patrols roam Springfield, but the cost of maintaining it means taxes go up ever so slightly, again enraging the town.  Finding true leadership within himself to duck this issue, Quimby rests the blame solely on illegal immigrants, and states that a vote will be held a week from now - Proposition 24 - to determine whether to deport illegal immigrants.  The mob is again appeased, and xenophobia quickly sets in town.  Homer is apart of this, even after learning that Apu is an illegal immigrant, and has no idea what to do if 24 passes.

Later, when Marge visits Apu, he tells his story.  Having been the highest ranked graduate out of a million or so at Calcutta Technical Institute, Apu is granted a visa to continue his studies in the United States, which he does.  When his visa expired, though, Apu was unwilling to leave as he had made so many friends in Springfield, and just stayed around.  Marge decides then to vote 'no' on 24.

However, it still seems 24 will be passed easily.  Desperate for an answer, Apu sees Kearney's newest fake ID and inquires him on where he got it.  Soon, Apu makes a deal with the mob for forged documents which 'prove' Apu was born in Green Bay, and Fat Tony encourages him to act American to avoid suspicion.  However Apu is neither able or willing to keep the ruse going for long, and breaks down after Homer becomes suspicious.  Seeing Apu in tears, Homer finally decides he'll vote 'no' on 24 as well, and decides to help Apu stay in America as well.

Its suggested by Bart that Apu could stay if he married a citizen, however the one person they tried, Selma Bouvier Terwilliger Hutz (!?) McClure, didn't want to marry for once.  Then, Lisa realizes that, since Apu has been in American long enough, he can simply take the citizenship test.  However, with the test just a couple of days away, he really needs to cram.  Homer tries to teach him, but Apu remembers none of Homer's lessons, much to Apu's fortune.

Apu is able to pass the test and become an American citizen.  At a celebration, Homer encourages the crowd to vote 'no' on 24, however 24 still passes by a 95% landslide.  Still, Apu is happy he can stay in American and in fact only one person is deported following the vote: poor Groundskeeper Willie.

Quick Review
This is another one of those 'start fast, finish slow' kind of episodes.  The whole thing with the bear at the beginning was wonderfully done, and Mayor Quimby's 'leadership' was humorous as well.  Once the episode settled in on Apu and Prop 24, the jokes died down a bit but overall this episode is another strong entry for Season 7.

Final Score: 9.1

22 Short Films About Springfield (S07, E21-149)

"Skinner with his crazy explanations, the Superintendent's gonna
need his medication.  When he hears Skinner's lame exaggerations,
there'll be trouble in town tonight!"

Plot Summary
Despite the title, there aren't 22 sub stories that fill this episode.  It's close to 22, but not quite.  Not that its a problem or anything.  Here, in minor detail, is every story featured:

1) Prologue: Bart and Milhouse, while chucking stuff at cars from a bridge above, wonder about the tales the people of Springfield have to tell, which sets up the rest of the episode.

2) "Apu in: The Jolly Bengali": As the two boys go to the Kwik-E-Mart to buy candy, Sanjay invites Apu to a party at his house.  Apu, unwilling to leave the Kwik-E-Mart for long, agrees to go for five minutes.  At the party, Apu pretty much has the full party experience in even less time, though he inadvertently locked Hans Moleman in the store in the meantime.

3) Lisa's Hair Problem (Part 1): As Lisa is recycling, Bart zooms along on his skateboard and tosses some gum away, unknowingly throwing it into Lisa's hair.  Lisa runs to Marge for help, but Marge only has oddball remedies for getting gum out of hair, such as applying peanut butter or mayo into the gum, but this doesn't seem to be working.  She has Lisa sit outside to let it sink it, but she's attacked by a swarm of hornets.

4) Smithers' Bee Problem: One bee flies off from Lisa and heads to the park, where it lands on Smithers (who is deathly allergic to bees), who is in the middle of a bike ride with Mr. Burns.  Burns, irritated that Smithers has slowed down, tries to shoo the bee away, but it stings Smithers instead.  With Smithers in dire need for help, Burns gets Smithers help the only way he knows how: by commanding Smithers to pedal the two all the way to the hospital.  The two make it but both collapse.  Rescue workers come out to help, but only grab Burns.

5) Dr. Nick's Malpractice Problem: After Nick confuses Smithers as a bum ("Holy smokes!  You need booze!"), he goes to a meeting with other doctors who confront him on a malpractice suit against him.  Just then, a crazy old man (Grampa) is causing havoc and insists on seeing a quack.  Nick steps up and 'calms' Grampa by telling him he has a condition where his skeleton is trying to escape the body, and uses 'electrotherapy' to 'cure' him.  The doctors drop the suit in forgiveness, and Nick gives Jasper a free nose job in celebration.

6) Moe's Burglary Problem: Moe officially calculates Barney's bar tab to be in the billions, but gets $2000 from him right away.  Snake runs in to rob Moe, holding Barney hostage.  Moe runs to safety inside a hidden, bulletproof compartment (with little air), which just allows Snake to loot Moe's newly acquired tab and run off.

7) "Skinner and the Superintendent": Skinner invites Chalmers for lunch, but burns his roast by mistake.  Using a series of lies and fabrications, Skinner is able to convince Chalmers that a bunch of Krusty Burgers he desperately bought is a family recipe and that the fire in the kitchen from the roast in actually Aurora Borealis in his own kitchen.  In all, it was a successful luncheon.

8) Homer's Maggie Problem: Hands full of groceries and Maggie, Homer sees an importantly headline in a newspaper stand, and goes to buy it right away, fumbling his possessions in the process.  He gets his paper, but accidentally gets Maggie stuck in the stand.  Having no usable quarters left and unwilling to leave Maggie to get more, Homer decides to just uproot the stand completely and take it home.

9) The Police's Hamburger Problem: Lou describes his time at a Shelbyville McDonalds, a restaurant that has zero presence in Springfield.  After hearing horrors about Krusty Partially Gelatinated Non-Dairy Gum-Based Beverages being called simply "shakes" at McDonalds, Wiggum has heard enough and goes out for donuts.

10) Bumblebee Man's Clumsiness Problem: After a hard day playing the bumbling bee at work, the actor tries to have a relaxing moment at home, but an incident involving oranges causing his clumsiness to take full effect, destroying the house and forcing his wife to divorce him.

11) Snake's Wiggum Problem: Coming off the heist, Snake is in a bind when he sees Wiggum, who just bought some donuts.  Panicking, Snakes tries to run over Wiggum, but crashes into a wall.  The two get into a brawl which goes into Herman's store, where he holds the two hostage for some reason.

12) Lovejoy's Flanders Problem: Reverend Lovejoy brought his dog to Flanders' yard for the sole purpose of having the dog do its business there.  Class act, Reverend.

13) Lisa's Hair Problem (Part 2): As Flanders goes to retrieve his shovel from Homer, he spies Marge still trying to get gum out of Lisa's hair.  He offers to help, but it doesn't seem to work.  Other townspeople chime in to give advice to Lisa's predicament, which only irritates the poor girl.

14) "Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel": Cletus finds a pair of boots for Brandine's job interview, but as they wouldn't really work well on the topless dancing runway, he has to return them where he found them: dangling on a wire.

15) Milhouse's Bathroom Problem: Milhouse desperately needs to use the bathroom, trying to do so at the comic book shop, but a transaction is required, and as Milhouse is doing that his dad gets him in trouble and takes him away before he could use the bathroom.

16) Wiggum and Snake in a Problem, Featuring Milhouse: Milhouse's next attempt is at Herman's shop, where his father notices both Wiggum and Snake beat up and tied up with Herman just standing there.  As Herman readies to take the elder Van Houten hostage, Milhouse accidentally knocks Herman out with a mace he grabbed.  Wiggum then tries to make his escape.

17) Lisa's Hair Problem (Part 3): Lisa passes Wiggum but is far too concerned about her hair to think about anything else.  She goes to the barber who cuts that part of her hair off, then stylizes it to make it look good.  Lisa starts feeling good again, but is immediately laughed at by Nelson.

18) Nelson's Tall Man Problem: Afterwards, Nelson laughs at Mrs. Glick tripping into a trash can, then laughs at a man driving a rather tiny car.  The man stops and steps out, revealing himself to be rather tall.  Nelson tries to escape, but the tall man catches him.  After a failed attempt at reasoning with the boy, the tall man decides to publicly humiliate Nelson instead, pulling down his pants and having townspeople laugh at him instead.

19) Epilogue: As Bart and Milhouse squirt condiments on Nelson from above, Bart realizes that there are indeed plenty of tales to be told by the townsfolk, but there simply just isn't enough time to hear them all.

20) "The Tomfoolery of Professor Frink": The professor runs in, his skit having been delayed by literal monkey trouble at the lab, but as he tries to sink his bit's theme song, the episode goes into credits and Frink promises that the monkey'll pay for this.

Quick Review
22 Short Films About Springfield, a rather experimental episode at the time, is one of the best episodes of the series.  There is just so many things that work right here.  I think part of it is that there are a good number of jokes in every bit that the writers forced in to make sure each bit is gold, but with so many bits there ends up being a lot of quality throughout.  Its a wonderfully written episode and its a shame more episodes like this were never made afterward.

Final Score: 10

Team Homer (S07, E12-140)

Perfect?  Homer's head isn't nearly big enough!

Plot Summary
The episode starts off with what ends up being the subplot, where Bart and Milhouse buy a Mad Magazine.  Among other things, the magazine gives Bart the idea to wear a shirt to school with the phrase "down with homework" causing a mass frenzy throughout the school.  In response, Principal Skinner introduces uniforms, rather dull, gray affairs that successfully drain the life out of the students that wear them.  Soon, they lose all sense of identity and become as dull and lifeless as the uniforms themselves.  However, the uniforms aren't protected against water, and a timely rainfall washes in a rainbow of color into each uniform, reigniting the student's spirit and willpower, and causing another mass frenzy throughout the school.

Meanwhile, Homer goes to a particular empty Moe's, with Barney, Lenny and Carl all tending to "mistresses".  Homer and Moe decide to go bowling, but are not allowed to actually play because its 'league night'.  Apu is also turned down from playing, but Homer gets the idea to have the three of them become a team, and later the nearby Otto (playing a claw game endlessly) because a team needs four bowlers.  The team also needs a $500 sign up fee, which stuns Homer, who eventually decides to try and ask Mr. Burns for it.  Lucky for Homer, he catches Burns in the middle of an ether high and Burns, mistaking Homer for the Pillsbury Dough Boy, happily gives Homer the money.

Named the Pin Pals, in the team's first match Homer is able to rally the team for a late victory.  The team goes on a roll from there, setting up a championship matchup with the Holy Rollers, consisting of Ned & Maude Flanders as well as Reverend Lovejoy and his wife Helen, a team that has won the title five years in a roll.  Despite that, Homer still declares the team to be unstoppable.  Just then, Mr. Burns finds out he gave $500 for bowling during his ether high, and learns he gave it to Homer.  Upon confronting the team, Burns has a 'change of heart' and decides to join the team.  Given Burns his is boss, Homer has no choice but to let Burns join, kicking out Otto in the process.

Though Burns improves in his game, being able to get the ball all the way to the end (in the gutter) in one push, he's still terrible and the group goes on a losing streak leading up to the big match.  Moe and Apu both push Homer to kick Burns off, but on the day of the championship Burns presents the group with special Pin Pal jerseys, and the group lets him bowl in the game.  Sure enough, Burns drags the team down, but they're down by only two somehow with just Burns left to go.  After a gutter ball, Burns' second attempt is just barely able to avoid the gutter, clipping two pins on its way out.  At the same time, Otto claws onto a screw on the claw machine, causing it to fall over, the impact forcing those two pins to also fall over.  The Pin Pals win the trophy, but Burns has another 'change of heart' and takes the trophy for himself.  Regardless, the team, with Otto will still cherish that they're a team, though later attempts by the 'team' to steal the trophy back from Burns proves painful.

Quick Review
Team Homer is good episode, but a step down from the other episodes thus far in the season.  The quantity of gags and jokes were just a bit less than in other episodes for the season, but its still a high quality episode.

Final Score: 8.5

Lisa the Vegetarian (S07, E05-133)

Well, the McCartneys are enjoying themselves, anyway.

Plot Summary
In an effort to do something Maggie will enjoy, the family goes to "Storytime Village", a park meant for ages 1 - 7 and a half.  Among the rather subpar attractions is a petting zoo, and the family sees progressively cuter lambs that they fall in love with, Lisa in particular.  Upon returning home, Homer notices Flanders having what he learns to be a family reunion.  Upset that Ned didn't invite him, Homer decides to host his own barbecue, a grand barbecue where Homer will invite only whom he wishes to invite (he invites Flanders by accident, anyway).

At dinner, Lisa finds herself struggling to eat a pair of lamb chops, unable to get the thoughts of the little lamb she met at the petting zoo out of her mind.  Realizing that there's no difference between that lamb and the remains of the one now on her plate, Lisa states aloud that she doesn't think it possible she could continue to eat meat, something Bart and Homer dismiss.

The next day at school, Lisa finds herself unable to dissect a worm, and her attempts to get a non-meat lunch alternative prove fruitless.  These efforts catch the attention of Principal Skinner, who shows Lisa's class an old propaganda film from the meat industry, which claims that people who say "don't eat meat" are at the very least ignorant.  Lisa attempts to stop her fellow classmates from falling for it, but is only met with ridicule.

The day of Homer's barbecue arrives, and it seems like the entire town has been invited.  Lisa attempts to stop everyone from enjoying meat by trying to serve ice cold tomato soup, again met with ridicule.  Officially tired of everyone's attitudes toward meat, Lisa goes on the offensive.  As Homer presents the pride of what's been a successful barbecue: a large, suckling pig, Lisa grabs a lawnmower, grabs the grill containing the pig, and forces it down a hill, ultimately beyond Homer's recovery.

That act angers Homer, but Lisa remains rebellious in that she believes she did what was only right and just.  The anger between the two spills into the next morning when Lisa can't take it anymore and leaves the house.  Outside, Lisa feels the pressure of all the meat-eating propaganda around her and eventually gives in, eating what seems to be a hot dog at the Kwik-E-Mart.  However, Apu appears and reveals that it was simply a tofu dog, and that he is also a vegetarian.  He takes Lisa up to a secret area behind a door with a sign indicating non-alcoholic beer.  There, Lisa also finds Paul and Linda McCartney, also big vegetarians.  Although Apu finds it sickening that Lisa is still okay with eating cheese, he teaches Lisa that tolerance must go a long way for someone like her.  She can influence people's opinions on things without badgering them about it.  Lisa realizes that she's been acting like a jerk to others, especially Homer, and decides to apologize to Homer for ruining his barbecue but at the same time maintains her newfound vegetarianism.

Quick Review
Hilarity wise, Lisa the Vegetarian is about on par with the other offerings Season 7 has presented thus far.  The entire bit with the pig, the Meat-eating video, and Apu's appearance late highlight some of the best moments of the episode.

Final Score: 9.1

Lisa on Ice (S06, E08-111)

The Maple Leafs could use Milhouse's adequate blowing abilities.

Plot Summary
Bart mistakenly believes the next day to be a snow day based on a weather report, only to find the next day to be unseasonably warm.  With a book report due that day, Bart's ass is saved (for awhile I assume) by an assembly where Principal Skinner announces the use of "Academic Alerts", which inform parents right away if and when a child is failing a particular subject, such as Ralph in English ("Me fail English?  That's unpossible!"), or Bart on pretty much everything.  A shock occurs when Lisa gets an alert, as it turns out Lisa is failing gym due to her lack of physical capability.  She learns she can avoid failing the class if she picks up an extracurricular sport outside of school, but neither basketball nor volleyball work out.

At the same time, Bart is participating in peewee hockey, a star player on Chief Wiggum's Mighty Pigs team.  Homer showers all of his praise on Bart, though he also threatens to punish Bart mightily should Bart fail or his team even lose.  One night, the Pigs are playing against Apu's Kwik-E-Mart Gougers, and one of Bart's shots concusses the Gougers' goalie, the poor Milhouse.  Receiving more praise from Homer later on, Bart taunts Lisa further by shooting garbage at her.  Noticing Lisa deflect each and every shot, Apu decides to take Lisa on as his new goaltender, with Lisa only obliging due to her failing gym grade.

Lisa's first couple of games go alright, but she plays terrified.  As the games go on, though, Lisa picks up a competitive streak and turns into a fierce fighter in net, quickly receiving Homer's praise rather than Bart.  Bart is further put down when his friends start hanging out with Lisa instead, who also defends him from bullies.  Suddenly finding himself on the wrong end of the popularity and success spectrum, Bart begins to despise Lisa, and the two form a heated rivalry against one another.  Though Marge attempts to cool heads, Homer reveals that Bart's team and Lisa's team are due to play each other, pushing the rivalry to new heights.

With glory, respect and Homer's adulation at risk, the game begins.  Bart gets a shot past Lisa for a goal, but Lisa stops one of Bart's later attempts.  The two get roughed up along the way as well, fueling an already bloodthirsty crowd.  With the score tied at 3 late, Bart is tripped on a breakaway and is given a penalty shot with time somehow expiring.  With the ultimate sibling showdown in place, and the crowd either chanting "Kill, Bart!"  or "Kill Bart!", Bart and Lisa begin to remember the good times they had with one another, and decide to take off their gloves and helmets, and hug each other, both claiming a good game had been played.  However, with time expired, the score remains 3-3 (which would've been the score had Lisa blocked the shot, mind you), inciting rage in the crowd, prompting a destructive riot.  Homer couldn't be more disappointed in his kids, but Bart and Lisa skate off the ice in good relations once more.

Quick Review
This is one of the most enjoyable episodes of the season.  Homer fills the role of the "projecting, over-competitive parent of sport-playing child", and he fills it very well as he somehow only has enough room in him to praise one child at a time.  The use of the many secondary characters throughout the episode was well done as well, and the episode ends on a warm note despite everything that happened leading up to it.  Its one of Season 6's best episodes.

Final Score: 10