Dogtown (S28, E22-618)

This was animated with an "who gives a crap" mindset.  You should see it in action.

Plot Summary
His car out of control in an alley, Homer is forced to stop it by ramming it into either his dog or Gil.  He opts for the latter, who attempts to sue him for the injury.  However, in court, the jury takes Homer's side after its learned that he spared his dog to injure Gil.  Santa's Little Helper appears in court to seal the deal, and Homer gets off with no penalty, much to Gil's frustration.

Later, as Homer enjoys his mild celebrity over the trial, the mayor decides to take advantage of this goodwill by making Springfield a safe haven for dogs.  Dogs all over come to Springfield to play, and laws are enacted to allow them to do whatever they want.  The town vet warns against this, as soon the dogs will realize they are the alphas and wreak havoc, and soon enough Milhouse's dog leads such a charge.  All of the dogs in town, including Santa's Little Helper as well as Willie, own the streets despite the mayor's attempt to rescind the pro-dog laws.

Realizing the the dogs need to know humans are in charge, Gil takes it upon himself, sort of, to do the task.  Meanwhile, Bart and Lisa go searching for their dog, only to find the feral pack.  Cornered, the two are saved by Marge, who kicks the alpha mutt far away, leading her to take over control of the pack before Gil even had a chance to do anything.  Marge safely returns the now playful dogs back to their owners while even downtrodden Gil befriends a dog (albeit the same one that led the dog rebellion in the first place).

Quick Review
It was an okay episode.  A couple of annoying things in it kept it from scoring higher, and while there were some decent lines here and there overall it wasn't enough to really cancel out the negatives.  I'm not particularly upset with the episode or anything, but I guess it wasn't that great.

Final Score: 6.6

Peeping Mom (S26, E18-570)

Pictured is Marge, half-assing her stealth clothing.

Plot Summary
Marge sees the aftermath of an incident where someone stole a bulldozer and bulldozed over several buildings.  Chief Wiggum has pinned the crime on Bart despite no motive, evidence and so on.  He gives Bart over to Marge hoping she can get him to squeal, but Bart denies everything, including even knowing about the bulldozer.  At her wits end, Marge decides to keep constant watch over Bart until he confesses his wrongdoing in the bulldozer incident.

Marge follows Bart to school, to Milhouse's secret area, and tails him even at night when Bart tries to escape for some solitude.  However, Bart continues to deny any and all involvement.  During the night time chase, Marge tries one last time to get Bart to confess, but he still won't crack.  Marge officially gives up, and leaves Bart to himself.

Meanwhile, Flanders gets a new dog, nicknamed Baz, who takes an immediate liking to Homer, much to the dismay of both Flanders and Santa's Little Helper.  Flanders wonders if the dog he had quickly grown to love should just go to stay with Homer instead.  Homer, however, realizes Baz only sees Homer as a playmate, another dog, and that Flanders is the best choice to be the dog's owner.

Bart reveals to Milhouse a new scheme of his, where - during the 50th anniversary of the "SPRINGFIELD" sign outside town - he plans to pull down several of the letters (using the bulldozer he indeed stole) to make it instead spell "FIE".  Marge shows no interest at all in this.  There, Bart is readying the bulldozer but notices that Marge packed some fried chicken before he left.  Growing a small conscience, Bart changes his plan at the last second to make the sign instead spell "FD" which the townspeople interpret as a tribute to the Fire Department.  Bart finds Marge and tells her he did indeed take the bulldozer, which an eavesdropping Chief Wiggum overhears, giving him enough reason to arrest Bart, but Marge forgives Bart I guess.  The episode ends with Santa's Little Helper (who made up with Homer) and Baz becoming acquaintances.

Quick Review
This episode starts out pretty well but the comedy dies out near the end.  The dog subplot was the same, it started off with promise but ended on a whimper.  Mainly, I didn't think the conclusions of either plot were really all that well written both for comedic effect nor for storytelling purposes.  The plot set itself up well, but it crashed kinda hard from there.

I also kinda think the episode could've worked better if Bart hadn't stolen the bulldozer.  I felt like as though the first half of the episode was setting it up to where Bart was actually innocent and that Marge was gonna look silly for being so persistent over nothing.  Not that I expect that alternative to of been written well either, but having Bart actually be the one to steal the bulldozer kinda makes the first, funnier half of the episode pointless filler.  I guess that irritates me a little.

Final Score: 7.0

The Changing of the Guardian (S24, E11-519)

They're so perfect, Bart and Lisa are even holding hands.

Plot Summary
An ordinary storm takes a turn for the worst when a twister appears near the Simpson home, taking the dog within it despite Homer's genuine best attempts at saving him.  Lenny and Carl, chasing the storm, offer to help so Homer and Marge tag along to find their dog.  The four catch up to the twister but it ruins the storm van and even sweeps Carl away.  Luckily, the twister breaks up just moments later, leaving both Carl and Santa's Little Helper alive, intact, and nearby.  However, the storm also drops a bank it had swallowed up right over Homer and Marge, who are standing just in the right place to avoid being crushed, though they're stuck within a bulletproof glass revolving door.

Afterward, the two realize just how close they came to death, and that if they hadn't made it the kids would've been turned over to the state with their crummy laws on the matter.  The two decide to settle on a guardian to take after the kids just in case both of them die.  Homer doesn't trust Grampa to do, so he's out.  Homer tries to call his half-brother Herb Powell, but he's "broke again".  The two try Patty and Selma, the latter having been raising her adopted daughter Ling, but Ling - who has aged several years despite previously appearing at a baby about Maggie's age - seems pretty despondent from Patty and Selma's harsh parenting methods, so that's out of the question.  The two also try asking friends, but after a few failed attempts the rest of the town catches on and actively avoids the two from asking them about guardianship.

Homer and Marge then decide to start looking out of town, where they come across a surfer named Mav and his wife Portia, an environmental lawyer.  The two are quite rich and successful, and they even have an old man who is far less annoying than Grampa is.  Believing them to be perfect, Homer and Marge officially ask the two to be the kids' guardians, and the two decide to agree.  After the paperwork, Homer and Marge let Mav and Portia spend some time with the kids while the two of them start spending more time alone.

A few weeks pass, when Marge sees to her horror a Christmas photo with Mav, Portia and the kids.  Believing that the two are 'stealing' the kids, Homer and Marge rush up to Mav's winter home to confront the two.  On the way, Marge wonders if Mav and Portia are actually better for the kids.  Homer confirms it so, but also states that those are their kids, theirs to raise unless they die.  After reaching the home, both couples try to talk things out, but the kids return to reveal they'd rather live with Homer and Marge, their biological parents.  Mav and Portia relent and quickly go off to do another rich person activity.  Back home, Homer and Marge give up on finding a guardian for now, deciding that instead of focusing on them dying they'll focus more on just living.

Quick Review
A couple of oddities before I begin.  First, Herb Powell.  The character had been in two episodes: a Season 2 episode where he, a successful car entrepreneur, gets ruined by his long lost half-brother Homer, kind of a downer, and a Season 3 episode where he uses the money won by his half-brother Homer to create an invention that makes him rich again, a nice redemption story.  So after 21 years, Herb finally makes another appearance on the show.  Well, I say appearance, but it was only a few seconds worth of a phone call, where Danny DeVito actually came over to record the single line, Herb is never seen and he quickly admits he's "poor again", ruining the good vibes from the Season 3 episode.  The five seconds worth of "gag" was pointless, stupid and perhaps even insulting.

Another oddity is that of Ling, Selma's adopted Chinese baby.  For several years, Ling was just that, a baby.  However, in a move which clearly shows the writers and staff couldn't give a care about any established continuity, Ling is now several years older, old enough to silently plead Homer and Marge to help her.  People aren't as affectionate towards Ling as they probably were towards Herb just because Herb was in two early-season episodes while Ling made her debut in Season 16, but even so aging Ling so much for, yet again, a single gag, seems kinda irresponsible.  I suppose there are some people out there who've come to like Ling - I wouldn't know how or why - but I bet they weren't all too please to find Ling as a helicoptered four or five year old in this episode.

Still, because these were only moment-long bits they didn't detract much from this otherwise decent episode.  The scenes during the tornado were pretty good, and the interactions between the family and Mav and Portia had its moments as well (not so much anything involving Lisa and Portia, mind you).

Final Score: 7.0

To Cur with Love (S24, E08-516)

Bongo, doing his best trick: bailing Homer out of crap.

Plot Summary
An accident leaves the Springfield Retirement home in ruins, and Grampa is forced to live with his son again, much to the Simpsons' chagrin.  Homer "breaks his back" just as they leave to help Grampa pack, and gets to stay home, alone, for some time.  Homer passes the time by getting addicted to a game, ignoring the dog's pleas for a walk.  Later, Marge and the family returns with Grampa and his stuff, and Bart learns in horror that the dog has gone missing.

As the family starts their search, Bart and Lisa realize Homer is relatively unfazed by the dog's disappearance.  When they find the dog inside a pantry shelf near the sink, everyone is happy the dog is alright, except for the lethargic Homer.  Homer admits he's never been much of a dog person, but Grampa reminds Homer of a "Bongo", bringing back memories Homer didn't want to recall.  As Homer runs off in tears, Grampa decides to tell the rest of the family about Bongo.

Bongo was Abe and Mona's dog when Homer was born, but Homer became really attached to Bongo as he grew older, especially after Mona left.  The two would do everything together and Homer considered Bongo his best friend.  However, things begin to turn sour when, during a nuclear plant kids fundraiser, Burns runs afoul of young Homer and Bongo, with the latter biting Burns in the hand.  Abe quickly helps the two flee as Burns demands the dog meet its death.  With no other options, Abe takes Homer and Bongo to a "crazy" woman who owns a ranch a bit out of town, and Abe has no choice but to tell Homer he's leaving Bongo with her, letting Homer leave his Itchy & Scratchy sweater with Bongo as a memento.  Homer, though, becomes immensely upset with Abe for doing it, and his relationship with his father becomes irreparably damaged.  Meanwhile, Abe is confronted by Burns again and, with no dog for Burns to slay, Abe agrees to do demeaning work for Burns, who basically turns Abe into the crazy old man he is today.

As the family sheds tears over the story, Homer returns to tell his version of the story, which doesn't work out right, but Homer does decide to tell a part of the story Grampa doesn't know about: a few months later Homer snuck over to the ranch to retrieve Bongo, however before he revealed himself, he sees Bongo having fun with his new owner.  Homer realizes that Bongo was happy without him, and from then on believes dogs to be unfaithful, traitorous mutts.  Grampa, though, shows Homer a Christmas photo of an older Bongo, years later, still favoring Homer's then-tattered sweater.  Homer realizes that Bongo still loved Homer, and that Homer had essentially resented dogs, also his father, for no good reason.  Homer makes up with Grampa, and at some point the dog as well as that night the two elder Simpson men are asleep with the dog on the couch, where Homer is dreaming he and Santa's Little Helper are enjoying time at a park populated by his younger self and Bongo, among others.

As the episode ran short again (likely because there was no opening), a minute is taken by Mr. Burns to explain the fiscal cliff and how he, like all other rich people, are devastated after the results of the 2012 election.  He tries to offer new ideas on immigration, but boy that doesn't work out for him at all.

Quick Review
Man, this episode got to me.  Its actually kinda similar to the Futurama episode Jurassic Bark.  Okay, not really, but a key theme is shared between this episode and that one: a dog who continues to love his former human friend even as it got older without him around.  Jurassic Bark was emotionally powerful for that reason, and so was this episode.  Unlike Jurassic Bark, which was pretty funny, this episode, well, it has its moments to be sure, but its nothing spectacular, and the bit with the fiscal cliff at the end kinda ruins the emotional ending the episode had going for it (which might be why it wasn't part of later re-airings).  Still, its nice to see an episode such as this as even if the show continues to struggles bringing on the laughs, it can still at least jerk a few tears.

Final Score: 7.5

How Munched is That Birdie in the Window? (S22, E07-471)

Like a speeding bullet.

Plot Summary
A pigeon flies through a window in Bart's room, having injured its leg.  As Lisa is creeped out by pigeons, Bart is tasked with nursing it to health.  He does so, but when the day comes for Bart to release it back into the open, neither he nor the pigeon are willing to part, so Bart officially adopts it as a pet.  He decides to teach it how to be a carrier pigeon, and that whole process is coming along nicely.  In quick time, the pigeon becomes a beloved member of the family (except from Lisa).  However, one day, Bart lets the pigeon out of the cage to cover it with a blanket, but in a flash Santa's Little Helper grabs and eats the pigeon.

Bart has a hard time dealing with his pigeon's death, especially at the hands of the dog.  At times, Bart comes close to forgiving it, but the dog ends up pouncing at a bird like thing or another dead animal or something, and Bart gets mad at it again.  The family takes Bart and the dog to a psychiatrist, who tells Homer and Marge they have no choice but to give the dog away.  The two find an ostrich farmer to give it to, and drive up to the farm to deliver the dog.  As Bart says one final goodbye to his dog, including the message that he should stop killing birds, Homer unwittingly lets an ostrich escape, and it makes it way towards Bart.  The dog starts barking at it, but remembers Bart's final words, and backs off.  Bart has no choice but to strangle the ostrich himself, rendering it dead.  From the act, Bart finally understands where the dog is coming from, and he finally forgives him.  Homer takes home the ostrich for dinner, but it turns out the bird didn't actually die, causing panic and chaos within the car.

Quick Review
This episode wasn't anything special.  Though the title kinda spoils the fate of the bird, the dog suddenly jumping in to eat it was still a bit of a surprise and really changed the tone of the episode, mostly for the worse as there really wasn't much to laugh at from that point on.

Final Score: 6.9

Stop or My Dog Will Shoot (S18, E20-398)

The design flaw here is that now, Robodog can not literally take a bite out of crime.

Plot Summary
The Simpsons go to a Harvest Festival, but end up getting stuck in a massive cornfield maze.  For some reason, the family splits up, and eventually Marge and the kids escape.  Homer, though, is unable to get out and he remains stuck inside for hours.  The police arrive to help, but their retrieval dog has gotten old and has given birth to puppies, so that's no help.  Instead, Bart calls over Santa's Little Helper, who had been resting in the car, to come and help.  After picking up Homer's scent, the dog is able to locate and bring out Homer.  The police are impressed with the dog's effort and invite him to be a police dog.

After some brief training, Santa's Little Helper becomes part of the force, teaming up with Lou in the K-9 unit.  As Bart begins to miss his dog, Santa's Little Helper quickly becomes overwhelmed with his new life on the force, and begins to display a more aggressive attitude to stay in the game.  The dog is able to catch and apprehend Snake after he tried to sell illegal steroids, but after incorrectly filing the paperwork, the court is forced to let Snake go.  Lou lets the dog go home for awhile to cool off, but it does little good; as Bart comes from behind to greet his dog, the dog reacts aggressively and bites Bart in the leg.

After some discussion, its decided that the dog will stay with Lou.  Homer and Marge decide to get Bart a new pet, and Bart eventually decides on a Python he calls "Strangles".  Bart takes Strangles to school for show and tell, but the python slithers away, forcing the evacuation of the school.  The police arrive with its K-9 unit, but as they go in the python slithers into the science lab, unwittingly creating a toxic gas.  The police are forced to flee the school, but its learned that Bart is still inside, looking for Strangles.  Santa's Little Helper storms in to rescue Bart.  Bart does succumb to the gas, but is rescued by Strangles and/or the dog, and Bart decides to let the dog finish saving him.  The dog is freed of its responsibilities as police dog, reuniting him with Bart, while Strangles becomes Willie's new pet, though its new role at the school is something I'm not quite sure of.

Quick Review
This ended being a pretty weak episode.  Stephen Hawking makes a quick cameo during the dog's search in the cornfield maze, and it was appreciated, but there was hardly much else to like here.  Once the dog became part of the force, it was hard to find anything worth laughing, though the bit with Snake (Jailbird) was alright.  Strangles had its moments too, but it all still made for a less-than episode.

Final Score: 6.4

Old Yeller Belly (S14, E19-310)

Beer commercials will probably never be this wild again. :(

Plot Summary
Bart's treehouse is destroyed, but Homer promises to build him a new one.  However, Homer isn't exactly doing a fast, good, or a job of it, so Marge brings in the Amish to build the treehouse.  They build a rather spectacular treehouse, enough to fit in a party's worth of people.  They also add electricity, which, well, isn't their specialty, and sure enough a faulty outlet causes the treehouse to set on fire.  Homer has an ice sculpture of himself fall on him, trapping him.  He sees Santa's Little Helper nearby, but the dog is scared of the fire and runs off (not before grabbing some turkey), and Homer passes out.  After a short period of time, the cat, Snowball II, goes in to wake Homer and with the sculpture now melted, Homer and the cat quickly escape.

Snowball is hailed a hero by both the town and especially by Homer, who denounces his cowardly dog in the process.  When interviewed, Homer even claims he has no dog, that's how mad he is at Santa's Little Helper.  Bart and Lisa try to toughen the dog up, but that's not working out so well.  One day, Santa's Little Helper is left outside after eating Homer's hamburger, and gets a hold of a nearby can of beer, balancing it on his nose.  A photographer gets a picture of it, and it makes the news.  The owner of Duff sees this and decides to make the dog the beer's new spokesman, with Duffman all washed up.  The family gets royalties and such, and so the dog becomes Suds McDuff, who appears in commercial as one cool dog.  However, the dog's previous owner, that guy at the race track who dumped him way back when, comes back to claim legal ownership of the dog, using Homer's dog-denouncing interview as proof that, at least, the dog doesn't belong to the Simpsons.

As the guy has the dog appear all over the place for Duff, the Simpsons decide to get their dog back.  They find the guy who was Duffman, Barry Duffman, and convince him to help them remove the dog as Duff's mascot.  At a beach function, they concoct a plan where Homer will pretend he's drowning, and the dog will prove too cowardly to save him, and then Duffman can come in and save both Homer and his old job.  With Homer floating on a beer keg, the plan starts off fine as the dog indeed proves his cowardice.  However, a shark sees Homer flailing about, and decides to circle him, forcing Duffman to cower away in fear as well.  Homer gets out of the way just as the shark makes its move, and the shark devours the beer keg instead.  It gets really wasted in front of the large crowd, causing Duff to make it its new mascot: Duff McShark.  The race track guy realizes the dog is finished, and gives it back to the Simpsons.

Quick Review
This was a fairly good episode.  I felt the best jokes came during the part where the cat was being hailed as a hero, and the middle portion was overall pretty great.  Duffman is a pretty good character for laughs, and he doesn't fail to provide them here either.  The episode's slow start bogs it down somewhat, but its still one of the best episodes of the season.

Final Score: 8.0

The Canine Mutiny (S08, E20-173)

"Remember the time he ate my goldfish, and you lied to me and said I never had
any goldfish?  Then why did I have the bowl, Bart?  Why did I have the bowl?"

Plot Summary
Marge gives Bart some junk mail after he gets no regular mail one day.  Among the junk mail is a credit card offer, which intrigues Bart.  Bart decides to apply for one and, despite him entering obviously fake credentials and the name "SANTAS LITTLE HELPER", he gets a credit card a few weeks later anyway under the name "Santos L. Halper".  He finds, though, that he can't use the card anywhere where somebody knows him, or at least knows his name isn't Santos, but he finds a catalogue, and decides to buy things from that, and he buys a ton of crap from it.  One of the final things he orders is a rarely bred, well trained $1200 collie, and as soon as the dog arrives it makes an immediately impression on Bart and the family, while Santas Little Helper is left ignored.  The collie, named Laddie, is some kind of superdog (as Homer would say), able to perform tricks and feats and such.

Soon, Bart receives a call from a collection agency, as Bart obviously never did pay off the credit card bill.  Realizing his mistake, he and Laddie go off to bury the card.  Upon their return home, the repo men have come to reclaim Bart's purchases.  They've collected all but one thing: the $1200 dog.  Panicked, Bart tells the repo man that Santa's Little Helper is the dog, and they take him away as Bart is somewhat stunned by these turn of events.

Lying that Santa's Little Helper is at a kennel two towns over while Laddie settles in, Bart begins to feel remorse for his actions.  Though the family, and the town as a whole begin to appreciate Laddie and his abilities, Bart is less impressed as the dog is and never will be Santa's Little Helper.  One day, during a walk, Laddie forces Bart to take him to rescue a baby.  As Laddie is giving a medal for his heroics, Chief Wiggum goes over to the two, openly wishing the police had a dog like that.  Bart decides to give Laddie to him as the dog just wasn't for him.  Back home, Bart tells the family that he gave Laddie to the police, and then reveals that he gave Santa's Little Helper away as well.  Homer (in an attempt to get Bart to eat dog food), convinces Bart to search for his dog, and off he goes.

At the repo station, Bart learns the the dog had been taken in by a "man in a dress".  After visiting his aunts with no luck, Bart tries Groundskeeper Willie, who is wearing a kilt.  Willie admits to having picked up the dog, but hated him so he gave him up to the church.  There, Bart learns that the dog was causing hell there, and that Reverend Lovejoy gave him to a parishioner.  Bart visits this person, seeing the dog in the backyard, but learns that parishioner is a blind man, a Mr. Mitchell.  Unwilling to talk about the dog with him, Bart takes his leave, but is still determined to get the dog back.

That night, Bart sneaks in to get the dog back, but the dog barks upon seeing Bart, alerting Mitchell.  Bart tries to run, but flees into a closet, where Mitchell locks him in, calling the police.  Bart yields and tells the man his story, and Mitchell decides to let the dog choose between him and Bart.  Santa's Little Helper chooses Bart, leaving the blind man without a companion, much to Bart's sorrow.  Just then, the police barge in, with Laddie.  As Laddie jumps on the blind man, it seems like there's a happy ending to be had.  Instead, Laddie finds a bag of pot in the man's pocket, and when Mitchell claims it to be medicinal, Wiggum advises Bart to leave as "this could take awhile".  Bart and Santa's Little Helper head for home just as more police arrive to start up to "handle" the pot situation.

Quick Review
This episode definitely has its moments, including Milhouse's line above and Homer's "dog food" line to Bart later on, and the ending had a neat little twist as well.  It all makes for another excellent episode for the season.

Final Score: 9.0

Two Dozen and One Greyhounds (S06, E20-123)

"I really like the vest."
"I gathered you."

Plot Summary
Santa's Little Helper is feeling rather frisky, tearing or burying all kinds of stuff.  Attempts to wear the dog out also fail, and going to the pet store to get a diagnosis ended up being a scam as well.  At that point, though, the dog slinks his way out of the car and runs back to the old dog racing track, where Homer and Bart found him oh so long ago.  Though intending to find the dog, Homer takes the opportunity to bet on a race, specifically for the dog "She's the Fastest".  While watching that race, in which She's the Fastest is winning, Santa's Little Helper comes into the racetrack, runs down She's the Fastest, and mounts her rather effortlessly.  The two dogs fall in love, and the owner of She's the Fastest gives up the dog to the Simpsons, as once its in love it can't really race anymore.  The two dogs do all sorts of stuff together, including each other, and soon enough She's the Fastest is super pregnant, so much so that she ultimately gives birth to 25 puppies.  Talk about frisky.

With the Simpsons enamored, the 25 pups begin their lives at their new home.  Soon, though, it becomes a hassle, as 25 dogs chewing up socks, sniping chips and plopping waste isn't an easy task.  A breaking point is reached when two of the dogs find their way into an already cooked turkey during a dinner featuring Homer's old drill sergeant, an IRS agent and Reverend Lovejoy.  Homer and Marge decide to give the puppies away, but people are reluctant to snatch any up as the 25 dogs don't want to be separated.  Soon, Mr. Burns appears, eager to acquire the dogs.  Amidst concerns as to what Burns would do with them, Homer doesn't allow Burns to take them, though Burns "finds a way" to acquire them anyway.

Now with the puppies gone Bart and Lisa hear from Chief Wiggum that Burns somehow acquired 25 puppies last night (not being able to connect 2 and 2 together, of course).  The two sneak into Burns' manor and are shocked to find Burns giving the puppies a bath.  One of them even stands up, like Rory Calhoun.  As Burns picks up that puppy to be his personal favorite, he soon reveals his true motive via a catchy tune: he plans to turn the dogs into a tuxedo in an effort to complete his animal-skin wardrobe.  Quickly, Bart and Lisa attempt to rescue the dogs, but are trapped by Burns in the basement.  Ultimately, though, Burns finds himself unable to kill any of the dogs, as Bart strategically placed some socks so that every puppy stands up, and both the dogs' and the kids' cries stay Burns from pulling the trigger.  Burns learns his lesson and promises to never kill another animal for the purposes of clothing (or at least any animal that can perform tricks).

Some time later, the 25 dogs have grown up and each become dog racing champions, earning yet another $10 million for Mr. Burns.  Unable to cope with giving up those dogs, Homer hangs himself up with his arm in the basement so he can bat a lightbulb around for amusement, at least until it crashes into his head.

Quick Review
This episode is a good episode, it can hold its own and it has plenty of good moments, most notably the "see my vest" routine near the end, but it doesn't compare to any of the other non-clip episodes this season has provided thus far.  The humor starts off rather slow as it builds up the storyline with Santa's Little Helper, and though the puppy storyline is pretty good it isn't fully able to help the episode recover from that slow start.

Final Score: 8.0

Dog of Death (S03, E19-054)

All hail King Homer!

Plot Summary
Its lottery fever in Springfield, and everybody is buying tickets, including Homer who buys 50 in the frenzy.  While this is occurring, though, Santa's Little Helper appears to be sick and barely able to stand (also his nose is gray the entire episode which is kinda odd).  It isn't until after Homer loses the lottery (but hey at least Kent Brockman won) where Grampa points out that the dog is dead.  Well, its sick but Grampa doesn't care.

A trip to the vet later, its learned that Santa's Little Helper has a twisted stomach, which will eventually kill the dog if left untreated.  An operation is needed to fix it, but it'll cost $750.  Homer and Marge are initially unwilling to do so because of the high cost, but Bart and the dog convince them otherwise, and Marge is able to devise a plan to save enough money, by having everyone make sacrifices.  Soon enough the money is scrounged up, and the dog is saved.

Just two days later, everyone is disgruntled, particularly Homer as his precious pork chop night has been replaced with chub.  As one would expect, the sacrifices the Simpsons made to pay for the operation is biting them hard.

• Marge gave up her weekly lottery ticket, but it turns out that her winning numbers finally come up.
• Homer gave up beer, and goes to the bar just to poorly sing songs for quarters.
• Lisa was getting volumes of the Encyclopedia Generica at the grocery store, but gave that up before she could get the volume on Copernicus: the next subject of Lisa's essay.
• Bart agrees to get haircuts at the Springfield Barber College for free.  That doesn't work out well.
• Maggie doesn't get any new baby clothes, while her current set just happen to fall apart at the right time.

As a result, everybody in the family gets angry at the dog.  Feeling unwanted, the dog is able to run away and go on an adventure for awhile before being picked up by the dog pound.  Mr. Burns, in need of a new attack dog, gets Santa's Little Helper to condition him into being a vicious attack dog.  Bart stumbles upon Burns' house in search of the dog, and upon being attacked by Santa's Little Helper, he's able to 'reach' his dog, returning him to normal.  The dog is brought back home and everybody loves him again.

Quick Review
Dog of Death is a weaker episode compared to several of the episodes that preceded it, but like with a lot of these early episodes there's still some good laughs to be had.  Much of the lottery-related storyline was great whether it was Homer's deluded dreams of using the winnings to become the pictured King Homer or Kent Brockman after he wins the lottery.  Still, one of Season 3's lesser episodes.

Final Score: 7.9

Bart's Dog Gets an F (S02, E16-029)

I just love happy endings, don't you?

Plot Summary
In this episode, we see the struggles of a young dog.  A dog whose carefree attitudes towards obeying has grand consequences.  A dog who could be given away for his lack of ability to follow commands, a threatening loop that could continue until his new owner dumps him as well.  A dog who needs both miracles and his own master's efforts to just graze the line of pass.  These are the struggles of one Bart Simpson.  Uh, his dog, I mean.

The need for Santa's Little Helper to learn obedience becomes apparent when the dog begins to rip and tear various things around the house.  After recovering the dog while it was causing havoc at a neighbor's house, a line is drawn when the dog later proceeds to tear up Homer's cool new $125 shoes.  Frustrated, Homer sends Bart and the dog to an obedience school, which uses a "choke chain" to promote obedience.  While Bart refuses to implement the chain, the dog is unable to learn anything, and continues his wild streak.  It reaches a head when the dog destroys Marge's six-generation family quilt she and Lisa had been working on, and especially when the dog eats Homer's massive cookie.  Homer declares that he's going to give the dog away, but Bart is able to convince him to keep him if he passes the obedience school.

As the dog continues to not improve at all, the day approaches when the dog must prove its obedience or fail the school.  Bart, with Lisa's advice, spends his last night with the dog just playing with him, but then afterwards breaks down, despondent as to how the dog can't even follow a simple command like 'sit'.  However, finally, the dog understands the command and sits, and then follows every command Bart gives from there.  Miraculously, Santa's Little Helper passes the school, and he gets to stay with the Simpsons.

Quick Review
This was another solid entry for Season 2.  It did have a lot going for it.  My favorite part of the episode occurred early on, when Homer's neighbor calls Homer to pick up his dog, and Homer is unaware the dog has run off, telling off the neighbor before finally realizing that, yes, the dog did fun off.  The Bouvier family quilt subplot wasn't really worth any laughs, though I don't think it intended to bring any, but all of Homer's frivolous spending was worth a few chuckles.  Overall, another good episode.

Final Score: 7.9

Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire (S01, E01-001)

I don't think Grampa was this happy ever again.

Plot Summary
The first episode to air (though not the first produced) was a Christmas special.  The first act reintroduces the world and its characters for those who hadn't been keeping up with the Tracy Ullman shorts.  Bart's trouble making at the school's Christmas show was worth a laugh.  Lisa's... lively rendition of the Santa Claus of the south seas sets her character up for years to come.  Patty and Selma are introduced as Marge's sisters who Homer despises and vice-versa.  Ned Flanders was a perfect neighbor, especially when compared to Homer and his failings.  The first act was very enjoyable as it set all of this up.  The next act didn't provide too many laughs.  Bart and his tattoo was the bulk of the entertainment, but otherwise it was mostly a plot-mover, showing that the family has no money to spend for Christmas.

The final act has Homer finding ways to salvage Christmas.  His humiliating work as a mall Santa was an enjoyable watch, and seeing him and Bart adopt former race dog Santa's Little Helper just as his previous owner dumps him was a bit heartwarming.  Who knew that it took a simple dog to save a family's Christmas.

Quick Review
It seems like such a long time ago, and that's because it has been a long time.  The Simpsons are airing episodes from its 24th season now, an unprecedented achieved for a scripted program.  There are many, many fans of the series who are younger than the series itself.  While the show's historic highs have allowed it to find the awful lows that it has seen in recent years, there's no denying that, when it is finally, finally, said and done, the Simpsons will of been one of the best programs to of ever graced the small screen.  The series, which began as a series of shorts on the Tracy Ullman Show, became popular, even more so than Tracy's show itself.  The popularity quickly translated to a standalone half-hour show, and within a couple of years, it was a big hit for the still fledgling FOX network.  Overall, it was a solid episode, and a great way to start the series.

Final Score: 7.9