Fatzcarraldo (S28, E14-610)

"We want the Family Guy audience." -these stupid writers

Plot Summary
After an aggravating night dealing with his sisters-in-law, Homer skips out to get a nice, calming, fattening meal.  However, the Krusty Burger as well as every other fast food place has since updated their menu with the latest food fads and Homer can't get his fix.  Homer has to leave town to find something that fits his palate, and finds a lone chili dog stand -Deuce's Caboose - with which he gorges to his heart's content.

Later, Homer learns from Grampa that, as a boy, Homer was left there while his parents underwent unsuccessful marriage counseling.  It was through Deuce that Homer gained his love for chili dogs and other fattening foods.  Though Deuce doesn't seem to remember Homer, Homer resumes eating at his stand, inviting his friends to eat there as well, causing Krusty Burger and similar outlets to lose sales.  Later, Homer decides to take Lisa (whose school radio program got shut down in a very brief sidestory) to the stand, only to find in horror it has been sold.

Deuce sold the stand to Krusty's food empire so he can retire, but as Homer sees the immediate price markup and likely loss of quality, Homer quickly latches the food caboose onto his car and takes off with it.  Lisa, doing one final radio bit, is able to convince several other fatasses to help Homer out in his chase, but the antics eventually lead to him and the caboose hanging on by a thread over a bridge.  Deuce runs up, having remembered Homer, and helps him back up with the caboose falling to its end.  The two reconcile, and that's that, I guess?

Plot Summary
This episode serves as a good definition of Zombie Simpson "dull".  Too many references, not enough jokes.  Glen Close returns to voice past-Mona for a couple of lines, but she clearly phoned it in both literally and figuratively.  Lisa had a tiny little insignificant sidestory that really served no purpose and offered no laughs.  Although not entirely irredeemable, there isn't anything in this episode worth a watch.

Final Score: 5.3

Pork and Burns (S28, E11-607)

"Why did you bring me back?  Just end me now.", the pig is likely thinking.

Plot Summary
Marge takes heed of a questionable Japanese tidiness guide and has the family start throwing stuff away if it is believed that it doesn't bring them joy.  Lisa, in particular, freaks out over this, and finds that a lot of things in her life do not bring her joy and are subsequently discarded.  Homer is reluctant to give up so many of his prized possessions, and that includes his prized pig, Plopper, previously known as Spider-Pig.  Homer doesn't want to give the pig up but Marge forces him to.  After a failed attempt, Homer learns that some pets can act as therapy pets for cases such as anxiety, and thus Homer successful gets Plopper to be his security pet with whom he brings all over with him.

Homer's demeanor calms as Plopper really does act as a therapy pet for Homer.  Soon, the family goes to a family function hosted by Mr. Burns.  Burns' hounds pick up the scent of the pig, and rush at it, maiming though not killing the pig.  Burns and crew confiscate the pig under the premise of healing it but in actuality they just want to eat it.  However, after the pig is fixed Burns takes a liking to the pig and decides to make it his pet.  Homer catches on and sneaks in at night to get it back.  Smithers aids in this endeavor as Burns fondness of the pig has made him pretty jealous.  Homer is so happy to get his pig back he's even willing to forgo beer to stay with him, a mistake Marge gladly takes Homer up on.

While that's happening, Lisa continues ridding herself of everything that brings her no joy, which now includes even her saxophone.  Bart is able to help her overcome her funk by giving her back her passion for music, and Marge later reveals she didn't actually throw anything away, she just put it all in a storage locker, so Lisa ends up okay, again.

Quick Review
The episode started off very poorly and the Lisa sideplot was fairly dull as well.  I was also hesitant about an episode based around the movie pig - can you believe its nearly been 10 years since the movie? - but the jokes and gags featuring Homer and pig worked quite well for a good chunk of the middle portion of the episode.  After Burns nabs him the episode dips in quality again but up to that point Homer and Plopper were salvaging what was otherwise a terrible episode.

Final Score: 7.0

Simprovised (S27, E21-595)

"End it."  He thinks.  No, not the bit.  Not the series.
Not even his life.  No, everything.  Everything must end.

Plot Summary
Chief Wiggum throws an extravagant birthday party for Ralph which includes a brand new, state-of-the-art treehouse, which makes Bart jealous.  He quickly coerces Marge into rebuilding his treehouse but, afterward, tells Milhouse not to bother thanking Marge as things such as major remodeling is only her "job" as a mom.  Marge overhears this and gets upset at Bart, but Bart gets help from Homer in making up to her and the two reconcile.

Meanwhile, Homer bombs on a speech at the plant thanks to his fear of public speaking.  To get his mind off the incident, Marge takes Homer to an improv show, where he's impressed with the group's ability to think and act on the fly.  He and a few others decide to take an improv class offered by the group and soon start up their own group, of which Homer is the star.  Lisa advises Homer to try his luck at a French festival coming up, but Homer psyches himself out leading up to the day.

Fearful of failure, Moe offers to become an improv plant for Homer, but Lisa overhears and pleads with Homer not to cheat.  Eventually, Homer agrees and does his improv show wonderfully.

The last few minutes are spent on a segment called "Homer Live", where Dan Castellaneta voice acts as Homer while the show digitally shows Homer on a desk (with a bunch of nonsense references flying around him to keep things interesting) moving his mouth as Dan talks.  The segment is just Dan answering (I'm sure) heavily screened questions which amount to a waste of time, honestly.

Quick Review
The episode itself was another bore, with barely anything of comedic note and with both stories wrapping up quickly and all too neatly for it be of any worth.

The "live" segment was interesting of course.  Perhaps with intention, an episode about improv then features a segment in which Dan has to improvise Homer's dialogue on the fly, and he threw out a few decent things that were limited by the rather punchless questions that made it through screening.  While the episode was beyond saving, this bit was still the best the show had to offer this night.

Final Score: 6.9

To Courier with Love (S27, E20-594)

I guess Homer "eclipsed" the competition, heh heh heh.

Plot Summary
Homer magically stumbles upon an old vintage car while cleaning out the garage.  After going on a mild tour driving it, that night he sees Marge is saddened with the burden of everyday life.  Homer wishes for a way to help Marge, and gets it when Jay Leno visits to buy Homer's vintage car - Leno being a connoisseur of such cars.  With his newfound money, Homer tells Marge that he'll take her to any place she'd like.  As she decides, Homer is visited by Leno again, who asks for the money back as the car ended up being confiscated by the police for never actually being owned by Homer.  With no extra money and Marge deciding she wants to go to Paris, Homer is in another marital bind.

Homer visits a travel agent to basically give him a trip to Paris for free.  The agent does give Homer the option of being a courier: helping the mob a client transport a package, with the trip and hotel paid for, but with the stipulation that the courier never look at the package.  Homer agrees, but it doesn't take long for him to break and decides to look in the package while on the plane.  He, and the nearby Lisa, find out a blue snake is inside, but Homer doesn't let Marge find out under the fears that the trip - and their marriage - will be ruined.

At the Paris airport, Homer meets the two French men with whom the package would be given.  However, after learning that the men plan to turn the snake into a belt, Homer and Lisa flee with the package.  As the rest of the family enjoys their time at Paris, Homer attempts to free the snake but is found by the two men and is forced to flee again.  Eventually, Homer tells Marge everything but as the two return to the hotel room they're met by the French police - who were summoned by those two men.  Under arrest for the "theft" of their snake, Homer can only watch as the police open up the package, only to find it empty.  The rest of the room is searched but no snake turns out.  Feeling tricked, the police escort the two men away, afterward it's revealed that the snake hid in Marge's hair.  Marge considers the vacation a success, and Homer returns home with gifts for his barmates - including a blue snake belt for Moe, artificial of course.

Quick Review
Much like the last episode, this one ends up being rather dull.  Some decent jokes here and there and the two French men were pretty funny, but overall the humor was too limited to really help this episode out.

Final Score: 6.4

Waiting for Duffman (S26, E17-569)

There's just something so... lifeless... about this whole episode.

Plot Summary
During a cycling function, Duffman injures his hip severely enough that he requires hip replacement surgery.  This forces the current Duffman, Barry, to retire, and Duff to hold a televised competition to find its next Duffman.  Homer decides to enter not (just) to be able to drink free beer, but also to earn some recognition that can be put on his obituary.  In the contest, Homer does well, but winds up as the runner-up.  Luckily for him, the winner has a tattoo of a competing beer brand, and with the winner being disqualified as a result, Homer ends up earning the title of Duffman.

However, Homer is injected with a computer chip that supposedly prevents him from consuming alcohol, as being Duffman is an always-sober endeavor.  Homer tries to drink a little bit of beer to check, but finds the chip really does work.  Regardless, Homer carries on his duties as Duffman admirably, and Duff finds its profits soaring as the public seemingly loves a man who looks worse than them selling them beer.  Homer, however, comes to find that Duff, and beer in general, actually brings ruin to people and the town, something he can only grasp now that he's been sober for so long.

At a racetrack, Homer uses his power as Duffman to have only non-alcoholic beer served, to prove that people can still have fun regardless of  the alcoholic content of their beverage.  Still, people don't like to be tricked into drinking non-alcoholic beer, and a mob forms to take Homer out.  The head of Duffman forces Homer to drink a regular beer to get the crowd off him, telling Homer that the "chip" was a ruse and Homer fell to the simple power of suggestion.  Disgruntled by that news, Homer drinks the beer to avoid the public lynching, and immediately reverts to his old self.  Still, Homer relishes in now being considered a "has been", while a healthy Barry is given back his mantle as Duffman.

Quick Review
This episode was pretty boring for much of the latter portion.  It started off pretty decently, but once it got into the Duffman antics the comedy just wasn't there.  The plot was fairly dry, and there was hardly anything remotely funny to redeem this episode.  The t-shirt cannon reference still stings 15 years later, by the way.

Sorry, Sam Simon, I wish you had a better episode dedicated to you. :(

Final Score: 6.1

Walking Big & Tall (S26, E13-565)

I kinda capped this randomly, but Selma can't believe what she's seeing right now.

Plot Summary
It's learned that Springfield's anthem is no different than the anthem of most other cities, thanks to former mayor Hans Moleman who "wrote" the song 30 years ago.  Mayor Quimby allows Lisa to write up a new anthem, and she enlists Bart to help with lyrics.  In short time, the two are able to come up with a new anthem focused on what Springfield hasn't screwed up on, and premieres it in a theatre.  During this, Homer has trouble fitting into his seat, and after the conclusion of what turns out to be a hit anthem, Homer is unable to get up during the standing ovation.  He gives another effort to do so but it turns disastrous as he pulls up the entire row of seats with him, causing mockery and other related damages.

The next morning, Marge tells Homer to go to a support group called "Over-Feeders Anonymous", but Homer accidentally enters a room full of similarly large people who take pride in over-eating known as "Big is Beautiful".  The group is led by a wheelchair-bound man named "Albert" who easily convinces Homer to take pride in his girth, including directly to Marge.  Soon, the group stages a protest against a store for promoting thinness, and the entire group is arrested.  Marge attempts to bail Homer out, but insults the group while doing so, forcing Homer to choose between staying in jail with his new food-positive friends or his diet-conscious wife.  Predictably, Homer chooses the former.

Bart and Lisa decide to come up with a new song to change Homer's mind (though Bart only proposed the idea to avoid talking to Marge further), but the two are unable to come up with anything.  Albert leads another fat pride protest at the town square, where Marge tries to reason with Homer again, but with Lisa and Bart arguing over their failure and Homer arguing that America's greatest leader was also wheelchair bound (Professor X, of course), Marge basically gives up.  Insulted that he is considered "wheelchair bound", Albert defiantly stands up to show that he is not ashamed of who he is.   Then he suffers a heart attack and dies.  After the funeral, Homer learns some lessons: first to never be proud of anything again, and to continue yo-yoing his weight from now until eternity.

Quick Review
This episode was not that funny.  Not a whole lot of jokes, well, funny jokes anyway.  There were a lot of meta references as well, but nothing worth laughing about.  The main plotline about the fat acceptance group had many lows and while the opening bit with the anthem wasn't a particular strong point the rest of the episode made no effort to improve upon it.  Another weak episode.

Final Score: 6.1

Steal This Episode (S25, E09-539)

What's with the hair, Channing Tatum?  "Based on a true story", my ass.

Plot Summary
It's Monday, and Homer is ready for some water-cooler talk.  However, the talk all across the plant is about the latest Radioactive Man movie, and it seems like Homer is the only one who hasn't seen it yet, and he tries his damnest to avoid getting the movie spoiled before he can see it and talk about it.  He and the family go to the movies to watch the film, but a 3D film for two adults, three children and a senior exceeds $70, and Radioactive Man-based advertising that isn't the actual film leaves Homer feeling broke and confused.  He rants about how bad the movie-going experience has gotten while in the theatre and is promptly thrown out before he can see it.

Seeing Homer depressed later on, Bart decides to help his dad out by introducing him to the world of internet piracy.  With a few clicks and a decent internet connection I presume (methods FOX refuses to let be known even though its pretty obvious at this point), Bart quickly provides Homer with an illegally obtained copy of the Radioactive Man movie.  After watching it, Homer is impressed with the process.  The next day, Homer goes to tell his co-workers about the movie, but they've all since moved on to a James Bond movie for discussion.  This time around, though, Homer is ready, and lets Lenny and Carl join him to watch a pirated copy of the latest movie at his house.  With the three thoroughly enjoying the movie, Homer is inspired and decides to host movie nights in his backyard, inviting people from across town to watch his illegally obtained material.

Marge finally catches wind of what Homer is doing, and how he's doing it, and is aghast in shame as she's seen one illegally downloaded movie already.  Unwilling to take part any longer, she sends a letter along with a check to a movie studio, but the head of said studio realizes he just got a name of a movie pirate and alerts the feds.  In short time, the rather expansive movie piracy department finds and arrests Homer for his supposed misdeeds, with Homer stunned that someone would turn him in for simply sharing his love of illegal content.  Marge realizes what's happened and feels massive guilt for what she has unwittingly done.

On the bus ride to prison, Homer is attacked by other prisoners when they learn of Homer's heinous crime, causing it to tip over and crash.  Homer is able to return home, and Lisa is quickly able to come up with somewhere he can legally hide: the Swedish consulate because, you see, the Swedes don't care about movie piracy or the legal ramifications thereof, you see.

As the feds fail to convince the Swedes to give up Homer, Marge confesses she sent the initial letter that got Homer in trouble.  Homer, stunned by this, gives up hope and gives himself up to the feds.  In court, the movie industry is trying to take Homer down hard, but with Marge's encouragement Homer decides to stand up for himself and his actions one last time.  The movie bigwigs there, including Judd Apatow, realize Homer's story is just like your sample movie blockbuster, and decide not just to drop the charges against him, but make Homer's tale of movie piracy into its own movie.  Homer gladly accepts and, somewhat predictably, gets upset when he learns other townspeople are trying to watch an illegally obtained copy of his movie now that he has a stake in its profits.  Bart and Lisa, in the episode's conclusion, try to find a moral to the story but admit that pretty much everyone involved is being a thief in some way, so whatever.

Quick Review
I really liked this episode, its the best episode I've watched in several seasons.  There are a lot of jokes that worked well early on, and thankfully the episode keeps the pointless movie references to a minimal, allowing the episode to really shine.  Things slow down at the end when Apatow and several other movie celebrities get involved, but the episode did so well up to that point they couldn't even ruin it.  The stance on piracy was mostly pro-piracy, I believe, but the more important thing was that the episode wasn't heavy-handed in its message (well, mostly), and it kept things at a 'parody' level of entertainment.  It really was the best episode in quite awhile, like as though it took the good will this season has shown so far and really displayed it all in one go.  It gives me probably misplaced hope for the rest of the season.

Final Score: 8.2

Labor Pains (S25, E05-535)

Such dirty thoughts, and with his girl right there too.

Plot Summary
Homer goes to a poker game at Carl's apartment one night, telling Marge he's going to be working late instead.  After exploiting Lenny's reflective shades to win the night, Homer quits while he's ahead.  Upon taking the elevator, a pregnant woman steps in as she's going through convulsions.  As luck would have it, the power goes out in the elevator, leaving Homer and the pregnant woman (and an unseen, uncaring third person) trapped.  The woman, who hasn't seen her boyfriend in months, starts going into labor, and Homer recalls his past experiences to the best of his ability to help deliver the baby.  The woman, Gretchen, decides to name the baby after Homer.

After a poker night where the others find out Homer's been exploiting Lenny's reflective shades, Homer realizes that Gretchen lives in the apartment right next to Carl's, and pays her and Homer Jr. a visit.  With nobody else around to help take care of the baby, Homer agrees to help Gretchen look after Homer Jr.  Homer devotes more and more time to the baby, which draws some suspicions from Marge, especially when she catches Homer buying tons of baby supplies at the store knowing full well he doesn't do that for Maggie.  Aware that Homer's been playing poker rather than go to work, Marge visits Carl's apartment but doesn't find Homer there.  However, she does hear Homer in the next apartment over and sees him playing with the baby, assuming the worst.

Homer quickly clears up the confusion, telling Marge about the elevator delivery (and the third man is around to confirm the story), and Marge does allow Homer to spend more time with the baby.  Homer tries to make amends by taking the baby along with his own three kids to the zoo.  However, Maggie and Homer Jr. just do not get along in the dual-stroller, and Homer Jr. slips out and pushes Maggie away.  Maggie ends up stopping herself, but Marge is there to witness this and decides enough is enough and forces Homer to stop seeing Homer Jr.  Homer relents, and prepares himself to never see the baby again.  Upon returning to Gretchen's apartment, it turns out Gretchen's boyfriend has returned, because he had spent the last few months in the military.  Homer gives the baby back to his real father and departs in a sad state.  Upon returning home, Homer is met by Maggie, who is willing to forgive her father for spending more time with that other baby, and Homer gladly embraces Maggie's forgiveness (these are things that actually happen).

In the sidestory, Lisa for some reason takes up an interest in, as she calls it, American football, and goes to a game with Milhouse (whose father is working as a peanut vendor at the stadium).  There, the cheerleading squad brings Lisa down to be an honorary junior cheerleader or something and Lisa fully enjoys the moment.  Afterwards, though, Lisa learns that the cheerleaders get paid very little for what they do and for how badly they're exploited.  She's able to rally the cheerleaders into going on strike until they get a raise and/or better benefits.  With apparently no other attractive women in town left to replace the cheerleaders, the team's owner is left with no other option but to cave in and give the cheerleaders a raise - at the expense of the peanut vendor's salary of course.

Quick Review
I enjoyed this episode more than I probably should have, really.  I mean, the episode's basic premise sounds pretty boring and having a Lisa-heavy sidestory never makes for good times, either.  Still, there were quite a few jokes and gags that worked in the episode for both storylines and there wasn't really anything that dragged the episode down any.  It's about as good an episode as one can expect nowadays though of course its nothing special.

Final Score: 7.5

Yolo (S25, E04-534)

Homer's storyline got kinda Looney Tunes, no, Merry Melodies at the end.

Plot Summary
As Homer and Marge wait for Milhouse to be picked up after spending the day with Bart, they notice Kirk Van Houten arriving in a new car, dressed like he doesn't care about anything.  Turns out, Kirk is now living by the "yolo" philosophy - you only live once, after all.  Marge and Homer mock Kirk later on, but as Marge openly states how happy she is that Homer is fine with living his boring old life day after day, Homer starts to get depressed that his life is, ignoring most episodes, boring.

Meanwhile, Principal Skinner is rocked when the local news finds rampant cheating being done by students at the school.  At a teachers-parents meeting Skinner is left unable to come up with any answers, but Lisa is able to come up with a simple solution: an honor system, where students vow not just to cheat on tests, but to also turn anybody in they catch cheating.  Lisa is able to trick students like Nelson and Martin into signing up for the system, and it seems like its an early success, with cheating now at all time lows.

Marge sees Homer sadly looking over some old letters - it turns out in 5th grade Homer had a pen pal from Spain he occasionally wrote to.  Tired of seeing Homer so depressed, Marge decides to contact the pen pal and have him cheer Homer up.  Soon, Eduardo, Homer's pen pal, arrives in Springfield to help Homer out.  It seems Eduardo lives by a similar "you only live once" philosophy and agrees to help Homer live out as many childhood dreams that he listed that are feasible.  After doing several, including riding a fire truck and portraying pirates in a play, it seems like the job is done, except for one last thing: gliding through the air like his childhood hero Rocky the squirrel.  Eduardo is somewhat hesitant to go through with this, but Homer wants no regrets, so the two ultimately get into a plain and glide-enabled jumpsuits to do just that.

After a push from Eduardo, Homer is in the air though he's having trouble getting stable.  Soon, with Eduardo's help, Homer is able to get it together and glide through the skies.  Nearby, Lisa learns Bart has still been cheating, and confronts him but Bart knows that Lisa won't turn him in, as that would mean Lisa's shiny new honor system actually failed.  Lisa goes mad from the dilemma, but some time later comes up with a solution: force Bart to turn himself in instead.  Homer, meanwhile, has now flown into Springfield itself and unfortunately glides right into the town's tallest building, causing him to fall.  He recovers, but hits the building again, forcing him to fall for sure this time.  During this, Lisa tries to get Bart to turn himself in, but Bart agrees to only do so if he's given a sign from God.  Moments later, Homer falls right on top of Bart.  Bart agrees to turn himself in, keeping Lisa's honor system working, and Homer is glad Eduardo was able to help him live a full life.

Quick Review
How long was "yolo" mainstream popular again?  Like, a month?  A couple of weeks?  It was a flash-in-the-pan twitter meme, but yet someone decided it would be a good idea to write an episode centered around the idea even though by the time it aired, everyone would be sick of "yolo" to the point of derision.  You'd think lessons would be learned, but alas that would be too good to be true.

The episode itself is alright.  The brief appearance of the Jon Lovitz-voiced Llewellyn Sinclair was appreciated and a few of the gags were pretty decent.  The cheating subplot was the funnier of the storylines, and it a big reason why the episode scored as well as it did.  The main plot with Homer and Eduardo was mostly boring, centering around a minute-long fad, and did nothing to really make this episode any funnier.

Final Score: 7.1

Homer Goes to Prep School (S24, E09-517)

Wonder why the creepy skull is for...

Plot Summary
The family goes to a kid zone of some sort.  While the kids have fun, mothers are allowed in one area while the fathers are in another.  A kid unwittingly leaves the building, causing panic and forcing a lockdown.  While the mothers take the change in stride, the area the fathers were in descend to anarchy.  Homer is nearly knocked unconscious during the chaos, where he deliriously imagines man as the savage apes they still have the potential to be.

Some time has passed, and the experience still traumatizes Homer, who still sees humanity as savage apes.  He's able to make it to Moe's, somehow, where he comes across a guy named Lloyd, who basically congratulates Homer for experiencing a taste of a lawless world.  He shows Homer a video which shows that when society crumbles, only the prepared will be able to survive.  Lloyd takes Homer to a secret society of "preppers", basically him, Herman, Lindsey Naegle and Superintendent Chalmers.  With their help, Homer learns the ways of the survivalist and quickly prepares emergency rations and such.  Homer is also shown a base camp some miles out of town where he's instructed to go once society falls.

Ironically, Homer's negligence at work causes a nuclear reactor to shoot out a EMP, shutting down power all across town.  Homer, unaware of the EMP, believes the end of the world is happening, and takes his now-convinced family to the base camp to hide out for awhile.  Marge, though, is angry with Homer for one main reason: abandoning everyone else in Springfield, showing he no longer has the big heart she loved him for.  Hit hard by this, Homer decides to pack some supplies to take back to Springfield, bringing the family along, but gets caught on his way out and is given chase.  Homer makes it back to Springfield where he sees something astonishing: people getting along.  Professor Frink explains that they learned only Springfield had lost its power, but it was restored after a few days.  Flanders then adds that the incident only causes a neighborly sense of togetherness within the community, as though all the angry people had left.  The angry people arrive in time to see the apocalypse not happen, but Lisa assures them that society is not as brittle as it may seem and it will last for many years to come... just as a zombie-ridden meteor is shown to be on its way.

Quick Review
This was another pretty decent episode, with some good humor at times and nothing that rubbed me the wrong way.  Its nothing spectacular, of course, but I enjoyed it.

Final Score: 7.2

To Cur with Love (S24, E08-516)

Bongo, doing his best trick: bailing Homer out of crap.

Plot Summary
An accident leaves the Springfield Retirement home in ruins, and Grampa is forced to live with his son again, much to the Simpsons' chagrin.  Homer "breaks his back" just as they leave to help Grampa pack, and gets to stay home, alone, for some time.  Homer passes the time by getting addicted to a game, ignoring the dog's pleas for a walk.  Later, Marge and the family returns with Grampa and his stuff, and Bart learns in horror that the dog has gone missing.

As the family starts their search, Bart and Lisa realize Homer is relatively unfazed by the dog's disappearance.  When they find the dog inside a pantry shelf near the sink, everyone is happy the dog is alright, except for the lethargic Homer.  Homer admits he's never been much of a dog person, but Grampa reminds Homer of a "Bongo", bringing back memories Homer didn't want to recall.  As Homer runs off in tears, Grampa decides to tell the rest of the family about Bongo.

Bongo was Abe and Mona's dog when Homer was born, but Homer became really attached to Bongo as he grew older, especially after Mona left.  The two would do everything together and Homer considered Bongo his best friend.  However, things begin to turn sour when, during a nuclear plant kids fundraiser, Burns runs afoul of young Homer and Bongo, with the latter biting Burns in the hand.  Abe quickly helps the two flee as Burns demands the dog meet its death.  With no other options, Abe takes Homer and Bongo to a "crazy" woman who owns a ranch a bit out of town, and Abe has no choice but to tell Homer he's leaving Bongo with her, letting Homer leave his Itchy & Scratchy sweater with Bongo as a memento.  Homer, though, becomes immensely upset with Abe for doing it, and his relationship with his father becomes irreparably damaged.  Meanwhile, Abe is confronted by Burns again and, with no dog for Burns to slay, Abe agrees to do demeaning work for Burns, who basically turns Abe into the crazy old man he is today.

As the family sheds tears over the story, Homer returns to tell his version of the story, which doesn't work out right, but Homer does decide to tell a part of the story Grampa doesn't know about: a few months later Homer snuck over to the ranch to retrieve Bongo, however before he revealed himself, he sees Bongo having fun with his new owner.  Homer realizes that Bongo was happy without him, and from then on believes dogs to be unfaithful, traitorous mutts.  Grampa, though, shows Homer a Christmas photo of an older Bongo, years later, still favoring Homer's then-tattered sweater.  Homer realizes that Bongo still loved Homer, and that Homer had essentially resented dogs, also his father, for no good reason.  Homer makes up with Grampa, and at some point the dog as well as that night the two elder Simpson men are asleep with the dog on the couch, where Homer is dreaming he and Santa's Little Helper are enjoying time at a park populated by his younger self and Bongo, among others.

As the episode ran short again (likely because there was no opening), a minute is taken by Mr. Burns to explain the fiscal cliff and how he, like all other rich people, are devastated after the results of the 2012 election.  He tries to offer new ideas on immigration, but boy that doesn't work out for him at all.

Quick Review
Man, this episode got to me.  Its actually kinda similar to the Futurama episode Jurassic Bark.  Okay, not really, but a key theme is shared between this episode and that one: a dog who continues to love his former human friend even as it got older without him around.  Jurassic Bark was emotionally powerful for that reason, and so was this episode.  Unlike Jurassic Bark, which was pretty funny, this episode, well, it has its moments to be sure, but its nothing spectacular, and the bit with the fiscal cliff at the end kinda ruins the emotional ending the episode had going for it (which might be why it wasn't part of later re-airings).  Still, its nice to see an episode such as this as even if the show continues to struggles bringing on the laughs, it can still at least jerk a few tears.

Final Score: 7.5

A Tree Grows in Springfield (S24, E06-514)

Brockman "hopes" he can stop hope before he can be stopped.

Plot Summary
Homer is depressed about life in general.  Not even a Duff-sponsored party can cheer him up.  He remains depressed as his family takes him to a school raffle.  However, to his surprised glee, Homer ends up winning the top prize in the raffle: an Apple iPad - oh I'm sorry, a "Mapple MyPad", whatever.  Anyway, Homer loves his new iPad and it does everything for him, including cheering him up.  Homer in particular becomes addicted to a pizza making app, and becomes so distracted by it he doesn't see where he's going and falls down an open sewer drain.  Homer is physically not too hurt, however the iPad did not survive.  The iPad wasn't the only thing that shattered, so too did Homer's newfound optimism.

Depressed once more, Homer is dragged out by Ned Flanders to be shown an odd sight: his tree has maple markings on it that spell out the word "HOPE".  As Homer had prayed to God for a goddamned break after his iPad broke, and with Ned Flanders preaching a "even if your tires are flat, you just take things real slow until you reach the next station" message, Homer decides to see things in a new light.  In church, Homer tells everyone about the hope tree, and a following of people start praising the supposed miracle.

Kent Brockman, disillusioned after a childhood incident involving a guy in a Mickey Mouse costume, remains skeptical and decides to find out the truth behind the message.  Quickly, Brockman learns and shows to everyone videotape of a mysterious stranger coming from out of nowhere and painting the word on the tree using typical store-bought maple syrup.  The message of hope dies, as does Homer's optimism again.  Marge finally cheers Homer up for good by telling him that he doesn't need iPads or fake tree messages because the hope he felt was real, not to mention there was somebody out there on Homer's side telling him to keep hope.  Later that night, the mystery person returns to the tree, and ends up being a sleepwalking Homer, subconsciously telling himself to keep hope alive.

With the episode done early, a short mini-cartoon about a love story is presented, but its two minutes worth of referencing nearly every false product the show has made over the years.  Yawn.

Quick Review
Two things really bothered me with this episode, as "grounded" as it was: everything involving "Mapple" and the "MyPad" and Steve "Mobs" and jabs at Apple's privacy concerns because "everyone cool owns iProducts so if we just mention how much Apple sucks ironically then we'll get all the laughs!"  Why.

The short story at the very end was stupid too, again only there because the main plot was boring enough that it couldn't fill up just two more minutes.  The main episode had a couple of decent jokes and moments, but overall it was boring mixed with a few lowlights, which is why it scored so low.

Final Score: 5.4

Them, Robot (S23, E17-503)

Oh, the humanity-er, robotiny, er, humanity but with robots, uh, hm, yeah.

Plot Summary
A plant physical is coming up, and Mr. Burns promises to fire any employee found with any drugs in their blood - including alcohol.  Homer tries to get through the weekend without drinking, but accidentally ingests some alcohol without realizing.  The following morning, Homer is fearful for his job, but Burns grows tired of even paying for the drug tests, especially when some employees contract gamma radiation.  Smithers tells Burns that today's technical advances allows him to replace his workers with cheap robot workers.  Burns happily obliges, and soon forces everyone at the plant to train the new robot workers before firing them.  Smithers, however, does tell Burns that he should keep one human worker around as a scapegoat, or to do tasks too low even for robots.  With Homer coming in to kinda tell Burns off sort of, Burns decides to let Homer be that one person that stays, even firing Smithers because one of the robots can do his duties even better..

With the massive layoffs, Springfield's economy hits the tank, and other businesses start to suffer.  Homer, meanwhile, tries to make friends with the robots, but they are unwilling to even acknowledge him except to get him off their backs.  Later, Homer accidentally breaks one of the robots, and pulls out a manual to try and fix it.  He learns in the manual that the robots do have a conversational feature, and after several explosions, finally learns out to bypass the security self-destruct to finally get the robots to talk.  Although the Brent Spiner-sounding robots only provide logical replies to Homer's rambling, Homer decides to trick the robots into playing a game of baseball with him.  Homer accidentally stumbles onto the road - and live traffic - forcing the robots to comply with their prime directive: to preserve human life.  Several get destroyed in the process, and Homer gives them a sendoff in his backyard.  However, now one of the robots tries to get Homer to stop drinking beer, and Homer decides to do something drastic to get them to stop nagging him about it: drilling holes in their heads to give each of them a "robotomy".  Predictably, this backfires, as all it does is replace the robots' prime directive with a new one: eliminate all impediments to the nuclear plant i.e. Homer.

As Homer flees from the now murderous robots, he runs to Mr. Burns house, but he can't do anything about the robots either.  The two flee to Burns' greenhouse, but the robots surround them in there.  Suddenly, the two are saved by all of Burns' former workers, who have banded together in either unemployment or underemployment and they work together to destroy the remaining robots.  Burns learns his lesson and rehires everyone as temps.  Later, Homer has reactivated one of the robots to go fishing with him, but the robot can't deal with Homer any longer and self destructs.

Quick Review
Can you believe its been over 10 years since Brent Spiner last portrayed Data in a live-action role?  Him providing the voice of the robots really was a joy to hear, and though the robots' interactions with Homer had its moments, there were also several lowpoints through the episode to prevent it from really being good.

Final Score: 7.0

How I Wet Your Mother (S23, E16-502)

A stark reminder that even Tracy Ullman short Simpsons are funnier than what we get nowadays.

Plot Summary
Smithers inadvertently leaves the supply closet ajar, which Homer takes full advantage of by letting everyone taking the contents within.  After work, Homer sees Burns approaching and quickly flees, forcing every other car to crash and spill out office supplies for Burns to see.  The next day, Burns yells at everyone for their thievery except for Homer, whom Burns didn't see with any supplies, and even gives Homer the day off.  Although the entire plant is angry at Homer, Homer doesn't care and he spends the day fishing with Bart at the lake, though Bart tries to correct Homer that karma is when if you do something bad, something bad happens to you.

Sure enough, the next morning, Homer wets the bed.  He's able to hide it, but the next morning he wets it even worse.  He realizes that this must be for how he threw everyone at work under the bus, and decides to make it up to them and karma by hosting an apology party, for free even!  Believing himself to be even, Homer happily goes to sleep that night, but finds in horror the next morning that he has wet the bed yet again.  Homer buys a 'urine detection system' to blare an alarm should he start leaking, and that's when the entire family learns of Homer's problem.  Later, Homer deals with it by simply wearing a diaper, which is a massive turn off for Marge.  One night, Marge is on a late night walk when Professor Frink just drops in, literally.  Aware of Homer's problem thanks to Twitter, Frink proposes Marge use a new invention of his which can go into people's dreams to find whatever subconscious quirk is making them do this or that.

Frink hooks up the entire family to a sleeping Homer, and they successfully enter his dream, which is him skiing adequately.  He's met by death, who's carrying a coffin.  As Homer uncovers that the coffin reads "Marriage", he panics a bit.  Suddenly, everyone falls off a cliff and, worse yet, Frink reveals that dying in the dream means dying for real.  Luckily, Lisa gets the idea for their dream selves to fall asleep and enter a secondary dream world of their own.  Quickly they do so, where they wind up in one of their own Tracy Ullman shorts.  Homer is forced to confront the marriage coffin, when fish suddenly swarm out.  With the room flooding with fish, the family decides to fall asleep and enter a tertiary dream world.  This world, Lisa's, is mostly uninteresting and everyone quickly falls asleep for yet another world, which annoys Lisa.  Finally, they reach Homer's innermost desires and while Homer is unwilling to confront his trouble, back in reality Chief Wiggum busts in to stop Frink for some reason, the two fumbling over Frink's dream device enough to cause chaos in the dream world.

Death returns to rescue the family, but reveals itself to be Homer's mother, Mona Simpson.  Taking the family to a secluded theatre, she reveals a scene back just weeks before she left Abe.  Abe and a young Homer had gone on a fishing trip promising to bring back plenty of fish, but Homer's excitement causes the boat to capsize, and the two are forced to swim all the way back, which takes hours.  Homer realizes its the same lake as the one he took Bart to the other day, and so that was what triggered his wet dreams, however he also comes to believe that it was his actions that caused Abe and Mona to split, though Mona quickly shows Homer that wasn't the case at all, so, uh, case closed.  Homer and Mona finally give each other a proper goodbye even though the latter is just a figment of Homer's dream, and the family is able to wake up from each level of dream they were in back to reality with Homer's as dry as he'll ever be.

Quick Review
This episode, which is the last episode I had seen before starting this blog (everything from here on out is new to me!), started off pretty decently with the nuclear plant storyline and the bed wetting plot was initially pretty good as well.  Professor Frink provided a modest amount of comedy, too.

However, once the episode turned into a full blown Inception parody things, predictably, went south.  Too much time was spent spoofing that movie and not enough time was spent making it all funny, though the homage to the Tracy Ullman shorts was appreciated.  The whole thing with Mona at the end was just weird as well.  Its like the writers finally got the memo that the way Mona Leaves-a ended wasn't the best way to conclude Mona Simpson's story and just hamfisted her into a poor Inception parody to set up a farewell dialogue between her and her son.  Coupled that with the odd resolution to Homer's bed wetting, and the latter part of the episode basically destroyed the good will built up at the beginning.

Final Score: 6.6

Politically Inept, with Homer Simpson (S23, E10-496)

She always knew, she always knew.

Plot Summary
The Simpsons are trying to go to their cousin's wedding but suffer delay after delay at the airport and in the airplane itself when hours pass without a takeoff.  Homer finally has enough and goes on a rant throughout the plane about how crummy airlines have become.  Bart is able to record video of the rant and uploads it to the internet.  In time, Homer learns he's become a popular internet sensation.  He gets invited to a conservative news program for some reason, and its host gets the better of Homer at first, but with encouragement from his family, he's about to out-rant the host and show him up.  Network executives come up and reward Homer by giving him his own show on their network.

Homer's rants on his show have an extra kick to them, as Homer often cries while defending whatever it is he's talking about, showing more emotion than most other pundits.  Marge and Lisa begin to worry that Homer's inciting flames of some sort, and that becomes true after Homer goes on a tear about the gravy boat of freedom or some such.  With legions of people now on the gravy boat bandwagon, Homer is chosen by the Republic party to select someone to become their candidate for presidency.  At the Republican HQ, Homer has trouble choosing a candidate, until someone shows up to make the choice for him: Ted Nugent.

Marge and Lisa now plead with Homer to reconsider, but Homer isn't backing down.  Homer then has a dream where James Madison shows Homer he's betrayed democracy, but he learns that it was actually a setup by his family led by Lisa.  Angered by this, he goes on his show to fully back Ted Nugent's candidacy, but finds he can't gather any emotion to back his pick.  Lisa shows up to tell Homer that this is because he doesn't believe what he's saying.  Homer admits he's full of crap, and apparently that's the end of his show and Nugent's campaign.

Quick Review
Well, this was a pretty bad episode.  Strike one: heavy political themes.  Strike two: Lisa meddling in Homer's affairs.  Strike three: Ted Nugent.  Oddly enough, its still not the worst episode of the season, but it certainly isn't watchable.

Final Score: 5.3

The Man in the Blue Flannel Pants (S23, E07-493)

Here's an entry for the 'extreme awkwardness' award.

Plot Summary
Krusty is forced to improve the brand awareness of his own crappy vodka, so he is tasked with setting up a party where that vodka is the main drink served.  He's also tasked with finding someone not just willing to host the party, but also hip.  Somehow in someway, Homer meets this criteria, so Krusty's party is held at the Simpson home.  Mr. Burns is accidentally invited to the party by Homer, and as expected he becomes a pretty big buzzkill.  Homer springs into action to save the party by having Burns do something more his speed: do some karaoke of a song old enough for him to be familiar with.  With the party back in full swing, Burns takes notice of how Homer handled the situation.  The next day, Burns decides to promote Homer to the plant's Account Manager position, with the previous one on his way to retirement.

The retiring guy, Robert Marlowe, shows Homer how to handle the position, which involves a lot of salesmanship and drinking bourbon during downtime.  With Marlowe's help, Homer is able to convince the mayor to allow the plant to increase their rates, and Marlowe bids Homer adieu.  Soon, though, Homer becomes worn out from his new job, with long nights and plenty of travel he becomes so disillusioned he turns into yet another television reference.  He doesn't even have time to read Lisa a bedtime story, forcing the half-illiterate Bart to do so in a side story so short its not worth explaining.

Marge becomes concerned with Homer's behavior and talks directly with Marlowe, who does reveal that the life of the account manager is one where hardly any time is left for the family.  Marge decides to reverse this and tries to convince Homer to take a vacation with the family to a rafting trip, showing him a brochure for it.  Homer sees Mr. Burns outside his office and quickly shoos Marge out, as Burns tells Homer he's got a big account for him to close, but needs an exciting locale to seal the deal.  Seeing the rapids trip, Burns suggests they do that to accomplish the sale, and Homer figures in his mind that he'll be able to do both the family vacation and the account at the same time, and agrees.

Of course, that doesn't work out so well as both Burns' raft and his family's raft are both out at the same time, separated only by a strip of forested land, and Homer has to quickly switch between the two often.  Quickly, Homer's scheme is found out by Marge and Homer is caught in the middle of both rafts as they both miss their docking points, now floating towards a waterfall.  Forced to choose between his work and his family, Homer ultimately decides on the latter and moves his family's raft to safety.  Marlowe appears from out of nowhere to save Burns - though not his clients - and he happily takes his old job back, allowing Homer to go back to his job as "safety inspector".

Quick Review
Well, its better than the past couple of episodes, but that's not saying much.  Again, the show attempts to reference, this time a cable TV show, and does so with enough accuracy that there wasn't any comedy to make it worth the effort.  The tiny piece of episode that was the side story wasn't funny either, and while the episode does pop up decent jokes from time to time, its still yet another weak effort to what has been a very weak season.

Final Score: 6.3

The Falcon and the D'ohman (S23, E01-487)

Couldn't of said it better, myself.

Plot Summary
The episode begins with the comic book guy stating the the results of the "Nedna" campaign over the summer will be revealed at episode's end, but there'll be hints in the episode as to whether they stay together or not (though its basically given away in a scene where Ned and Edna are in bed together and Edna just winks at the viewers).

Homer comes in late to work, but successfully evades trouble to punch in "on time".  Afterward, he goes to greet his security guard friend, when he sees that ol' Larry has been replaced by the less friendly Wayne.  Homer tries to make friends with Wayne, but Wayne refuses to even let Homer fistbump him.  Homer is eventually able to get Wayne to ride with him to the tavern, where Wayne still isn't very friendly.  Just as he goes to the bathroom, Snake runs in to rob everyone.  Wayne is able to bust the scene and stop Wayne rather definitively.  As thanks, Homer invites Wayne over for dinner, where Wayne starts having flashbacks of 'special training' he's had in the past, and leaves early.  The next day at work, the media has learned of Wayne's heroics, and Mr. Burns plans on putting a commemorative helmet on Wayne.  It triggers another flashback of Wayne almost being forced to lose his memories via a helmet, and after choking Mr. Burns during the trigger, Homer intervenes to save Burns.  Burns fires Wayne for his act, but Homer decides to let Wayne stay over at his house.

Wayne teaches the family various techniques which they probably shouldn't be learning, but oh well.  He hears Lisa play a particular tune on her saxophone, which causes him to remember a dinner party where a gun fight broke out, and freaks out again.  At the same time, in Kiev, a gangster or something finds video of Wayne choking Burns online, and realizes who it is, recalling the same dinner party where Wayne's actions caused the gangster's wife to be killed.  With vengeance in sight, the gangster flies to Springfield to trap Wayne.

Homer unwittingly reveals to the gangsters that he's Wayne's friend, and they kidnap him and send out a video for Wayne to see.  He's thankful Homer had previous eaten a large quantity of tracking chips, and is able to locate Homer in an ice skating rink.  Wayne is able to sneak into an equipment closet, where he prepare a t-shirt gun full of t-shirts and gasoline to create a makeshift missile launcher.  He's able to defeat the gangsters and save Homer.  Later, Wayne is forced to leave town again, but before he leaves, he lets Homer fistbump him to indicate their friendship.  Marge intervenes, and tells Wayne there's a perfect place for Wayne to hide: the DMV, where Wayne now has rather lengthy flashbacks of him writing plays for Kim Jong Il.

During the credits, Ned and Edna reveal that, yes, they've been voted to stay together.  Principal Skinner comes in wondering why he wasn't an option, and his mother chides him for being late to the party as always.  A message then pops up that this arrangement is basically canon forever.

Quick Review
The episode itself is not that good.  Keifer Sutherland - again - appears as a pretty decent guest voice, but the plot was pretty unfunny as a whole, especially the ending with the Kim Jong Il play.  The big 'reveal' of the Nedna vote wasn't done very well either.  There was hardly any suspense for the reveal, and the episode practically gives it away midway through anyway.  I suppose things could've been worse, but this is a pretty disastrous start to the season.

Final Score: 5.7

Homer Scissorhands (S22, E20-484)

In this scene, you see a man die inside.

Plot Summary
After Bart and Lisa accidentally get paint on a sleeping Patty's hair, Homer is forced to do something about it or get in trouble for letting it happen.  Homer cuts Patty's hair, and unwittingly makes it looks pretty good.  After Patty and Selma realize what's happened, Selma makes Homer cut her hair as well.  The two send out word of Homer's ability, and soon Homer becomes in demand for haircuts.  Homer reveals that, because he's lost his own hair he's grown a fascination with it, so much so that he's able to create fantastic cuts without even trying and so after learning how lucrative cutting women's hair could be, he opens up a hair salon.

However, Homer is forced to hear every woman talk all day long about their husbands or significant others, and the continued chatter starts driving Homer insane.  He can't even see other men in town without attaching the criticisms their wives have made about them.  He tries to retire, but Chief Wiggum won't let him when his wife wants her hair done for an upcoming policeman's ball.  He tries to suck at it, but his hands are just too good.  Seeing her husband going insane, Marge finally has enough.  At the policeman's ball, Homer and Marge show up with Marge showing off a spectacular haircut.  The women at the ball compliment Homer's latest, greatest work, but Homer reveals he didn't cut it at all: Marge's normal hairdresser Julio did, and so all the women across town go straight to him for their cuts now, relieving Homer from his misery.  Homer decides to thank Marge by giving her a haircut of her own.

While this is all happening, Milhouse reveals to Bart that he has a new perspective on life after finally being able to see the opening scenes of Finding Nemo, which had previously been restricted from him.  Realizing that if fish can die, he too can die at any moment so he decides to tell Lisa he loves her in a rather open fashion.  He does so in the cafeteria, but Lisa plainly rejects Milhouse.  However, a fifth grader named Taffy liked what Milhouse did and the two become a couple, which makes Lisa suspicious.  Unable to grasp the concept of a popular fifth grader going out with Milhouse, Lisa starts stalking the two on a date.  However, Lisa gets a bit lost in the process and ends up crashing the two's special moment.  Taffy takes it as a sign that Milhouse will always love Lisa somehow, and breaks up with him.  Milhouse becomes upset that Lisa not only won't hook up with him, but is now preventing him from hooking up with anybody else.  Desperate to cheer Milhouse up, Lisa kisses him and though she's as uncommitted as ever, she does admit to him that he does look cute in the moonlight.

Quick Review
Well, this episode is pretty boring for the most part.  Both stories didn't have much going for them, Milhouse's side story less so.  Homer's storyline has a few noteworthy moments, particularly his flashback and the scene at the bar with Moe, but it too was mostly unspectacular.

Final Score: 6.5

A Midsummer's Nice Dream (S22, E16-480)

Life will never be this groovy again...

Plot Summary
On TV, Kent Brockman reflects on the careers of the celebrated Cheech and Chong, who are going to be in Springfield for a show coming up.  As Brockman reveals "Richard Marin" and "Thomas Chong" were once Channel 6 meteorologists who got their first whiff of fun from an unrelated event outside, Homer is stunned to learn his kids don't know who the two are (Bart also claims ignorance on Beavis & Butthead, even though that show has premiered, ended and recently come back throughout the entire existence of The Simpsons).  Homer was a big fan of the two back when they were big, and Marge was okay with them I guess, so the family goes to see their live show.  Homer and the rest of the crowd gets excited when the duo start their "Dave's not here" bit, but Chong has gotten tired of the repetitiveness, and gets into an argument with Cheech about trying to experiment and not selling out.  The argument eventually reaches a head, and Chong just ups and leaves.  With the show in the balance, Marge convinces Homer, who has remembered every line from the duo's antics, to go up and finish the act with Cheech, which proves to be a pot-influenced success.

Cheech is impressed with Homer's act, and invites him to tour with him across the country.  As "Cheech and Chunk", Homer is excited by this at first, but slowly he comes to learn that Cheech the person is not like Cheech the character.  Real life Cheech cares about making sure the show is perfect, while valuing his cultural heritage, things Homer just can not believe.  Meanwhile, Chong tries to start up a new act, bringing along Principal Skinner as his new partner, as Chong believes him with the unfunniest person there is could create a mindblowing show.  Calling the act "Teech and Chong", the show takes a rather deep look into the fact Dave is actually there, but the show is universally hated.

Meanwhile, Marge and Lisa take the dog for a walk, but it runs off chasing after a cat.  Running into a house, the dog leads the women to the house of the crazy cat lady.  Full of clutter and garbage, its quickly realized that the cat lady is a massive hoarder, and Marge takes it upon herself to clean up the mess.  Sending the cat lady to a movie, Marge along with a team go in and clean up the woman's house, leaving it sparkling clean.  Not only is the cat lady's house cleared, so too is her mind.  As the cat lady regains her sanity, Marge starts taking an interest in some of the clutter that was cleaned up, opting to keep it for herself.  In no time, Bart and Lisa return home to find the house full of garbage, and Marge has become a massive hoarder herself.  Lisa tries to call Homer for help, but Cheech is forcing Homer to continue a rehearsal and he's unable to answer.

Homer does answer eventually and finds a moment to escape Cheech's iron grip to return home.  Homer confronts Marge over her hoarding, bringing in the sane no-cat lady to talk with Marge.  However, the woman becomes enveloped in her garbage again and quickly devolves, calling back both her cats and her insanity.  Homer takes Marge out of the house, under the premise that things will work itself out with a crazy lady inside, and they leave.  The two go back to Cheech, but Homer brings along another person: Chong, who has realized that people just like their classics, for better or worse.  Cheech also comes to terms that its okay to go outside the box every now and then as well.  The two reunite, and things work out for the best.

Quick Review
This is one of the best episodes of the season.  I may be old enough to predate The Simpsons, but I'm still not old enough to remember Cheech and Chong in their prime.  Even so, the pair provide excellent guest spots for the episode, and the bits with "Cheech and Chunk" were excellent.  The hoarding side story has its moments, but nothing too notable, but for the most part the main plot of the episode was pretty good, though the end with Bart as the Shakespeare character Puck (referencing the episode's title) was too odd to be of any worth.

Final Score: 7.9

Donnie Fatso (S22, E09-473)

I like how there's a carrot in Fit Tony's hand, as though we wouldn't get that he's fit otherwise.

Plot Summary
It's New Years Day, but unfortunately for Homer, he gets pinned by a slew of Springfield's new laws meant to tax the hell out of people.  Piling up $1000 worth of fines, Homer gets advice from Moe to place a bribe at window #9 at the courtroom.  Homer tries to do so, but nobody is at the window at the time so he leaves his ticket and a bag with the word "bribe" on it at the window.  Of course, a short time later Homer is arrested for the bribe and is given a 10 year jail sentence.

Homer is about to begin his sentence when Chief Wiggum reveals a way Homer can get out early: become a mob informant.  Homer meets up with an agent of the FBI, who informs Homer he's been on Fat Tony's tail for 20 years, trying to catch him smuggling Belgian guns.  He wants Homer to get close to Fat Tony, wearing a Fonzie-like wig which contains surveillance equipment as a disguise.  With Tony and his cronies currently in prison, Homer is sent in as Nicky "Blue Pants" Saxophony, and befriends Louie after he 'defends' Louie from a 'guard' (the FBI agent).  Louie takes Homer's act as genuine, and soon introduces Homer to Fat Tony, who decides to break out of prison.  As the prison was made by the mafia, Tony quickly crumbles a nearby wall and the group easily escapes.

Tony and Homer become fast friends, but before Homer can get any closer, Tony wants Homer to whack Moe, who mistakenly believed Tony's innocent mis-dial was a prank call.  Tasking Homer to burn down Moe's Tavern, Homer is saved when Moe does the deed himself rather than install a ladies' room.  Tony doesn't see this and only assumes Homer actually did it, and therefore lets Homer into the family, a gesture Homer fully accepts.  Soon, though, Homer is taken to a dock where Tony tells Homer about a Belgian gun shipment that's about to come in.  Homer tries to warn Tony, and as authorities start moving in, Tony finally figures out that Homer was a rat.  Unable to deal with the betrayal, Fat Tony has a heart attack, and dies right there.

With the FBI agents rather cold towards Homer, Homer is let free and is able to go home.  Still, he can't let go of his time with Fat Tony, and visits his grave where he gets whacked with a shovel.  Upon coming to, he thinks he hears Fat Tony's voice, but its actually the voice of his cousin, Fit Tony who, as the name implies, looks like a much fitter version of Fat Tony.  Fit Tony planned on killing Homer, but after seeing Homer's genuine sorrow and grief towards Fat Tony's death, Fit Tony decides not to kill Homer, believing that Fat Tony's memory will live on in him.  Homer narrates the rest, as Fit Tony takes over the Springfield mafia.  However, Fit Tony has a hard time dealing with the pressure of being a mob boss, and starts overeating to lessen his woes.  Eventually, he gains enough weight to be called "Fitfat Tony" and then just "Fat Tony", even wearing the same clothes as the original one.  Still, Homer is glad to be back with his family even if the only person in said family to ever shoot a gun was Maggie.

Quick Review
I remember seeing this episode when it first aired, and I remember hating it.  I gave a pass to The Principal and the Pauper back in Season 9 for its blatant screw around with established canon, but for some reason having Fat Tony die only for him to be replaced by his cousin Fit Tony who ate so much he became the new Fat Tony just bugged me badly.

Watching it again, the episode isn't as bad as I originally thought it to be.  Leading up to the big moment, the episode actually fares pretty decent, as well as most other Season 22 episodes thus far anyway, and the segment where Homer infiltrates Fat Tony's crew was entertaining.  Hell, the moment Fat Tony dies wasn't bad either by itself, I didn't have a problem with that and the gag with Homer's self-destructing hair added a nice but not overboard comical touch to it.

Still, though, the inclusion of Fit Tony, and using him to maintain a Fat Tony character for future episodes seems like such a cop out, even by Armin Tamzarian standards.  Its like the writers wanted to make an impactful episode, complete with a characters death, this time with meaning unlike a previous episode, yet they were mandated not to kill anyone off so they threw together a nonsense of an ending to keep canon intact, even though it loses all of the impact of the death.  It seems so pointless and it just ruins the episode.

Final Score: 6.4